# Survivor: Guatemala - Ep. 5: "Crocs, Cowboys, and City Slickers" **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 13, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092 "2005-10-13T16:59:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/1 "2005-10-13T16:59:53Z")
Title from [Yahoo! TV](http://tv.yahoo.com). Blurb in spoiler boxes below: Winners of the Reward Challenge get a crocodile-proof swimming pool delivered to their camp; the driving rain takes its toll on the castaways, leading one to an outburst; another castaway irks tribe members with tales of a glamorous life. I think (or maybe hope) that the title is a misdirection. Everybody (even me, a little) will assume that the jig might be up for Gary (it’s probably going to happen sooner than later), but I wonder if the Survivor referenced in the last line of the spoiler is [Blake](http://www.cbs.com/primetime/survivor11/survivors/bio_blake.shtml). To me, his life outside the game sounds pretty cushy. Guess we’ll see. Here’s hoping things get more interesting tonight! And also, here’s hoping that we’ll see much more of **Howlie the Mohawked Pirate Monkey** , since he seems to be the most interesting thing going on right now. BTW … does anyone know if the recent earthquakes in Guatemala were anywhere near where this season was filmed? I can’t seem to find accurate locations on any online maps (but I am navigationally retarded, so it’s probably my own fault). ---
**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2005, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/2 "2005-10-13T17:56:02Z")
I like the show, but we need some good character development. We need some fire. We’ve had four boots and none of them have been interesting. I am enjoying the Survivor blog. Ian just really seems like a solid guy. I thought Dolphin Boy fans would enjoy this quote: > [@](#): > > Don’t get me wrong, I would slaughter the fatted calf to be there again. Integrity sure as hell isn’t paying the bills…that million looks better than ever. Also, I heard more about the possibility of Probst leaving the show. Boxed in case people are anal about it: According to E!'s Kristin, the producers are looking to replace him, if he leaves after this one as expected, with a female host, possibly a former contestant. I don’t like the idea of ANY former contestant being the host. I predict a boot tonight for Amy. (I would have called Brooke last week had I not withdrawn it in favor of **rockle’s** sister…) ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2005, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/3 "2005-10-13T18:26:55Z")
> [@rockle](#): > > …but I am navigationally retarded, so it’s probably my own fault). Good thing you’re not on _The Amazing Race_ ! You’d have to pray for Jesus to help you find the right exit. 😃 Kidding! Kidding! Yay for Thursday! ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2005, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/4 "2005-10-13T18:51:26Z")
I like Probst as an interviewer. He asks the questions I’d like to ask at the final show. But I’ve always wanted to see someone hosting the show like James Earl Jones or Anthony Hopkins. I’d like to see a little more voodoo priest, and a little less camp counselor. ---
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2005, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/5 "2005-10-13T19:59:32Z")
> [@BiblioCat](#): > > Good thing you’re not on _The Amazing Race_ ! You’d have to pray for Jesus to help you find the right exit. 😃 Heh. Actually, I’m OK if I have a paper map right in front of me, but I can’t work Google Earth for the life of me. Which is probably the problem, actually: I’m using more technology than I need. If I’m ever on TAR, I’m going to have to navigate, because … well, let’s just say that hubby doesn’t call me the “Car Clutch Killer” for nothing. > [@middleman](#): > > I predict a boot tonight for Amy. (I would have called Brooke last week had I not withdrawn it in favor of **rockle’s** sister…) Using my typically contrarian strategy, I’m going to encourage you to go with that thought. Maybe if _you_ predict the boots, then the person I want out will actually get booted. > [@Liberal](#): > > I’ve always wanted to see someone hosting the show like James Earl Jones or Anthony Hopkins. I’d like to see a little more voodoo priest, and a little less camp counselor. Either of those people would be _sweeeeeeeeeeeeet_. Although I actually think someone like Chris Rock would make a great “Survivor” host, too. Because he would ask the “what the hell is _wrong_ with you?” questions that we at home often ask our televisions. ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2005, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/6 "2005-10-13T20:20:02Z")
> [@middleman](#): > > According to E!'s Kristin, the producers are looking to replace him, if he leaves after this one as expected, with a female host, possibly a former contestant. I don’t like the idea of ANY former contestant being the host. I’d be okay with that… as long as it’s not Stephanie. That would be the end of my Survivor viewing if they had her come back to be host. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/7 "2005-10-14T00:28:08Z")
Wow. I intensely dislike that whiner. ---
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/8 "2005-10-14T00:45:19Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > Wow. I intensely dislike that whiner. Holy crap, yes! I feel like FedExing her some cheese to go with that whine. Dear God, woman, what have they _done_ to you? When did you develop this incredibly overindulged sense of self-entitlement? Sweet Lord in Heaven. Picking on Bobby Jon because he’s excited? Unnecessarily bitchy. I can’t wait until she is gone, _gone, **gone.** _ Buh-bye! ---
**Author:** ![EllisDee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellisdee/32/4531_2.png) [@EllisDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllisDee)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/9 "2005-10-14T01:07:46Z")
_Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz_ Glad to see the Golden Boy booted. The physical challenges were fun, but I’m not captivated by any of the non-challenge portions of the show. At all. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/10 "2005-10-14T01:21:41Z")
I kind of liked Stephanie until she regressed into a middle schooler with all that “He’s so gay” shit. Seems to me that a super competitive, athletic woman like her would be all for bucking gender stereotypes. Blake came across as a pathological liar. ---
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/11 "2005-10-14T01:22:08Z")
I fear I might have been incorrectly adjusted at the chiropractor’s office tonight, because I actually found that episode vaguely _entertaining_. Just _vaguely_, but still. In any case, I must admit that I found the episode to be satisfying, somehow. I still wonder exactly what kind of super-mojo-voodoo powers Brian has that he is still around – if he makes the merge, I would watch out for him. He is one of those “students of the game” in the good kind of way, I think: He knows how to win friends and influence people just long enough to keep his own _tuchus_ out of trouble. Curious to know what, if anything, went on between Gary and Danni – and the rest of the tribe, for that matter – since last ep. No mention of Gary’s ex-NFL past this week (not even from Gary – _shocker!_), and in fact he and Danni seemed to get along pretty well. Perhaps they even genuinely like each other (as much as is possible in this game, anyway). Stephenie and Jamie, will you please both shut up and go out into the jungle and just _do it_ already? And then when you’re done, would you please get chomped upon by toxic spiders or something? God. You both annoy me. What happened to you guys? I liked you for a second, there, a couple of weeks ago. Oh … and, except for the shelter that Koror won in Palau last season, that pool might be the most awesomest reward ever in the history of this show. (Shut _up_, Rupert! A Hawaiian sling isn’t that cool to the rest of us!) And that Reward Challenge looked pretty durned cool, too. I would very much have liked to ride in the wagon. ---
**Author:** ![Frostillicus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Frostillicus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frostillicus)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/12 "2005-10-14T01:51:12Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Blake came across as a pathological liar. At least he now gets to go back and see his girlfriend with the double-Ds. :wally ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/13 "2005-10-14T01:51:30Z")
Man, can I say that Stephanie is a bitch!? I already had some Stephanie hate going on, but tonight pushed it waaaay over the top. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/14 "2005-10-14T02:38:25Z")
I’m still trying to figure out something. Was Stephenie a middling-mediocre player stuck in a tribe full of yutzes so completely yutzy that it was a wonder they remembered to breathe, and therefore looked like a damn good player in comparison, or did they just edit her a HELL of a lot more flatteringly, personality-wise, in Palau? ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/15 "2005-10-14T04:51:31Z")
I wonder if Blake realized that his girlfriend’s PARENTS might watch the freaking show? :rolleyes: What a freaking idiot. ---
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/16 "2005-10-14T06:50:57Z")
Judd is more annoying than ever. I’m glad Lydia did well in the immunity challenge. After all the ragging on her for being older and less athletic it’s nice to see her not on the chopping block. The semi-mandatory prayer services bothered me. The prayer wasn’t even non-denominational. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/17 "2005-10-14T09:59:20Z")
I only caught the last 20 minutes or so. Would somebody mind filling me in on what all Blake was saying that bugged everybody so much? From reading TWoP, I got that he was talking about his girlfriend’s double D breasts (while receiving a backrub from the “Thank Goodness it Fits” sized Danni). But was there more? And what exactly did Brandon say about “novelty boobs?” ‘Cause that is freakin’ hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/18 "2005-10-14T12:20:02Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Was Stephenie a middling-mediocre player stuck in a tribe full of yutzes so completely yutzy that it was a wonder they remembered to breathe, and therefore looked like a damn good player in comparison, or did they just edit her a HELL of a lot more flatteringly, personality-wise, in Palau? Yes. On both counts. And it’s interesting to watch her go from one of the “(Alleged) Most Popular Survivors Ever” to one of the “Survivors You Would Most Like To See In A Steel Cage Deathmatch With Sue Hawk.” With money on Hawk. I really liked her last time. Now, I find her insufferable. I really wonder what Burnett (or whoever) said to her in the off-season to turn her into this. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/19 "2005-10-14T12:37:19Z")
> [@Green Bean](#): > > I only caught the last 20 minutes or so. Would somebody mind filling me in on what all Blake was saying that bugged everybody so much? > > From reading TWoP, I got that he was talking about his girlfriend’s double D breasts (while receiving a backrub from the “Thank Goodness it Fits” sized Danni). But was there more? > > And what exactly did Brandon say about “novelty boobs?” ‘Cause that is freakin’ hilarious. Actually, it was Blake suddenly contracting verbal diarrhea and basically talking, pretty much constantly, about himself and his frat buddies and the stupid things they do and how they treat women and how he really thinks of women and stupid stuff he did and how his life is so great and he travels around the world and gets stupid drunk and does stupid things with his stupid friends and gets in stupid trouble because of it and… Seriously. It’s like when he finally started feeling better and could actually breathe, every single air molecule was forced to pass through his larynx and contribute to this giant-size bubble of self-puffery he was forming. It was a work of art. Stupid art, but art nonetheless. And I love how Brian kept putting quarters in the bubble machine…it’s always nice to see a strategy that actually works the way the strategist intended it to on this show… ---
**Author:** ![Nutty\_Bunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d07c76/32.png) [@Nutty\_Bunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nutty_Bunny)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2005, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092/20 "2005-10-14T12:50:25Z")
> [@middleman](#): > > Also, I heard more about the possibility of Probst leaving the show. NO!! Just no! He’s the perfect combination of eye candy\* and snarkmeister. He can’t leave. And can you imagine: someone like Amber as host? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…Susan would be much better. I guess. \*_Although I don’t know what he’s thinking with that hair this season._ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/survivor-guatemala-ep-5-crocs-cowboys-and-city-slickers/326092.md?page=2)