# Swiss Army knives **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [January 2, 2008, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015 "2008-01-02T18:58:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/1 "2008-01-02T18:58:55Z")
In Cecil’s 1995 column on the [Swiss Army Knife](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a4_158.html), he said: > [@Cecil](#): > > Today the knife has become emblematic of almost comical versatility. Boy, he didn’t know the half of it! From the [Victorinox Web site](http://www.victorinox.com/index.cfm?site=victorinox.ch&page=157&lang=E): > [@Victorinox](#): > > SWISSMEMORY™ USB Victorinox rediscovers itself > The next generation: Swiss pocket knife with 2GB storage capacity and a new outfit > > It has always been smart and chic, and is now even more powerful in its amazing new outfit. SWISSMEMORY™ USB Victorinox, the liaison between the traditional Swiss pocket knife and a Hi-Speed USB storage device is now available on the market with a capacity of 2 GB in addition to the classic variant in rubyRED and in the chic Silver Edition retroALOX. Whee! A USB-enabled pocketknife with 2GB of memory! ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/2 "2008-01-02T19:54:11Z")
MacGyver would be so proud. ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/3 "2008-01-02T20:00:12Z")
That is awesome. My son will want one of these. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/4 "2008-01-02T20:16:12Z")
[QUOTE=Cecil] There’s even a model with a blade that will let you perform–I am not making this up–an emergency tracheotomy, no doubt inspired by an actual emergency tracheotomy performed with an SAK aboard an airliner in flight. [/quote] Great; but that can’t happen now because they won’t let you carry anything sharp or useful onto an airplane. Good luck performing a tracheotomy with a plastic spoon. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/5 "2008-01-02T20:31:06Z")
Which model Victorinox is, or most closely approximates, the army-issue knife? I’m guessing the [Soldier](http://www.amazon.com/Victorinox-Soldier-Swiss-Knife-Silve/dp/B000MWFKYM). ---
**Author:** ![Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aji_de_gallina/32/260_2.png) [@Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aji_de_Gallina)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/6 "2008-01-02T20:47:11Z")
…and people still will not believe in God…what more proof do you need??? ---
**Author:** ![Jake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2008, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/7 "2008-01-02T21:32:29Z")
[QUOTE=Cub Mistress] That is awesome. My son will want one of these. [/QUOTE] Heck, I’m 116 years old and I want one! No, I want 2!! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/8 "2008-01-03T00:15:38Z")
Two gigs of memory? Damn, mine’s only got a half a gig. I feel so obsolete. ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/9 "2008-01-03T01:14:40Z")
[QUOTE=Johnny L.A.] Which model Victorinox is, or most closely approximates, the army-issue knife? I’m guessing the [Soldier](http://www.amazon.com/Victorinox-Soldier-Swiss-Knife-Silve/dp/B000MWFKYM). [/QUOTE] That would be right. However the knife might change slightly in 2008. [An article describing the new knife](http://www.swissinfo.ch/fre/actualite/detail/Le_couteau_militaire_suisse_a_termine_son_service.html?siteSect=106&sid=7998967&cKey=1183723895000) says it will have a phillips screwdriver and a saw, plus some way to lock the knife in the open position. The tradition will still be maintained that only officers will have the corkscrew. ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/10 "2008-01-03T01:18:54Z")
McGyver wouldn’t want a USB drive. MacGyver would want the [Giant Knife](http://www.wenger.ch/scripts/Modules/Products/listOne.aspx?idProducts=319&idn=166) - 87 tools and 141 functions! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/11 "2008-01-03T01:40:09Z")
[QUOTE=Arnold Winkelried] That would be right. However the knife might change slightly in 2008. [/quote] So mine is now a ‘collectible’? Are the ‘issue’ knives different in any way? (Physically or markings?) [QUOTE=Arnold Winkelried] [An article describing the new knife](http://www.swissinfo.ch/fre/actualite/detail/Le_couteau_militaire_suisse_a_termine_son_service.html?siteSect=106&sid=7998967&cKey=1183723895000) says it will have a phillips screwdriver and a saw, plus some way to lock the knife in the open position. The tradition will still be maintained that only officers will have the corkscrew. [/QUOTE] Alas. Je ne parle pas français.. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/12 "2008-01-03T02:05:57Z")
Am I the only one, of the set who actually uses tools almost daily, who’s tried to use one of these things? Functionally, they’re junk. The new generation Leatherman, with the blade lock, is far superior. I well remember back in the day trying to drive a screw with one of those SAKs. I usually put it away and used a dime. Okay, the tooth pick was handy, I guess. Junkjunkjunk. Peace, mangeorge ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/13 "2008-01-03T11:01:18Z")
[QUOTE=mangeorge] Am I the only one, of the set who actually uses tools almost daily, who’s tried to use one of these things? [/QUOTE] Leatherman scissors are useless movie props. Give me my SAK any day. I once rebuilt my carburetor with just a SAK and a pair of pliers. ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/14 "2008-01-03T11:45:38Z")
[QUOTE=mangeorge] Am I the only one, of the set who actually uses tools almost daily, who’s tried to use one of these things? [/QUOTE] Does using the bottle opener a couple times a night count as using tools almost daily? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/15 "2008-01-03T15:10:54Z")
I find the leatherman tools a bit bulky to carry around - I don’t have a SAK any more though - I have one of [these](http://www.swisstechtools.com/productdetail.aspx?PID=NLlBjkwLR0MA) and one of [these](http://www.swisstechtools.com/productdetail.aspx?PID=VZ75GDTdP68A) on my key ring (that does entail a bit of function redundancy, as both tools have screwdriver functions) - if I need anything more serious than that, I get the toolbox (or a fixed blade knife) ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/16 "2008-01-03T15:12:43Z")
[QUOTE=Fear Itself] Leatherman scissors are useless movie props. Give me my SAK any day. I once rebuilt my carburetor with just a SAK and a pair of pliers. [/QUOTE] Scissors? I’m talking pliers, screwdrivers, file, blade and such. Tools! ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/17 "2008-01-03T15:17:10Z")
[QUOTE=Mangetout] I find the leatherman tools a bit bulky to carry around - I don’t have a SAK any more though - I have one of [these](http://www.swisstechtools.com/productdetail.aspx?PID=NLlBjkwLR0MA) and one of [these](http://www.swisstechtools.com/productdetail.aspx?PID=VZ75GDTdP68A) on my key ring (that does entail a bit of function redundancy, as both tools have screwdriver functions) - if I need anything more serious than that, I get the toolbox (or a fixed blade knife) [/QUOTE] I have the micro-plus too. It’s the one I carry around and it serves in 99% of what little work I do any more. My big leatherman stays in my drawer. Nifty little tool. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/18 "2008-01-03T16:43:57Z")
[QUOTE=mangeorge] Am I the only one, of the set who actually uses tools almost daily, who’s tried to use one of these things? Functionally, they’re junk. The new generation Leatherman, with the blade lock, is far superior. I well remember back in the day trying to drive a screw with one of those SAKs. I usually put it away and used a dime. Okay, the tooth pick was handy, I guess. Junkjunkjunk. Peace, mangeorge [/QUOTE] Dunno; I’ve driven plenty of screws with a SAK. In my experience, the Victorinox knives are better-built than the Wenger ones. I’ve had a SAK in my pocket since the late 1970’s, and get some use out of it about every day. (Even got me laid once, sort of. Remarkable how many people bring wine to a camping event and don’t have a corkscrew.) ---
**Author:** ![RiverRunner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/977dab/32.png) [@RiverRunner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RiverRunner)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2008, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/19 "2008-01-03T18:09:48Z")
The main thing I use on my SAK is the tiny pair of scissors. I never would have thought they would come into play so often. RR ---
**Author:** ![puppygod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@puppygod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puppygod)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2008, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015/20 "2008-01-04T15:51:45Z")
I have a victorinox, although not classical SAK but one of larger ones with blade lock. I think it’s atlas. It’s totally functional. I used every single option available - saw, pliers, screwdrivers, awl, corkscrew etc., often for things that it was not intended to (like opening deformed cans using main blade or unscrewing rusted mutters with pliers) - and it always performed great. It’s actually was my main tool when I was doing remodeling in my home, because it was always at hand so I don’t need to go for, say, phillips screwdriver every time I needed one. I still use it on a daily basis and I do use tools. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/swiss-army-knives/432015.md?page=2)