# Take a news headline too literally

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180>\
**Category:** Thread Games\
**Created:** [November 30, 2021, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180 "2021-11-30T04:04:35Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\
**Post date:** [November 30, 2021, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180/1 "2021-11-30T04:04:35Z")

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“Federal Judge Deals Major Blow To President Biden”: Biden was attacked by a federal judge who punched him really hard.

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**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2021, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180/2 "2021-12-01T00:13:38Z")

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Decades ago there was a senior politician in the UK called Michael Foot. If he had been put in charge of the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation (NATO), the headline could have been:

Foot heads arms body

😀

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**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2021, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180/3 "2021-12-01T01:47:36Z")

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^ Cheeky.

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**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2021, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180/4 "2021-12-01T05:01:01Z")

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‘‘CNN Suspends Chris Cuomo Indefinitely’’

Do you suppose they hung him by his feet?

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**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\
**Post date:** [February 17, 2022, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/take-a-news-headline-too-literally/955180/5 "2022-02-17T22:26:22Z")

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“U.S. Coast Guard offloads $1 billion worth of narcotics”

Oh, they meant $1 billion worth of seized, illegal narcotics.