# Taking shoes off etiquette **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 25, 2011, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612 "2011-02-25T18:56:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/21 "2011-02-26T00:31:20Z")
> [@scr4](#): > > You say there were several shoes “on the front porch”, is this where you later found your shoes? Front porch is maybe not quite the right word. I tend to call the area outside of any residence’s front door the “front porch”. It was an apartment that opened to the outside. My shoes and another guest’s were on the walkway outside the front door, just next to the welcome mat. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/22 "2011-02-26T02:57:00Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > This is not specifically about your shoes-outside, but just a side note to the shoes on vs shoes off. > > One of the conclusions that some of these discussions have reached before is that areas that have long/frequent periods of snow tend to be shoes off. The snow leads to a lot of water or mud on your shoes. If this is the case for months out of the year, this can mean a lot of nastiness inside. :shrug: We are a whatever you want to do house. And we live in snow at least 6 months out of the year. Sure, we have mud season, and I might even take my shoes off after walking the dogs. Snow is just moisture where I live. In the deep of winter there is no dirt or anything else mixed in with it. Drives me crazy when people expect their guests to take off their shoes. I think it’s very rude (and uncomfortable [for me] to boot). ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/23 "2011-02-26T02:58:45Z")
> [@iamthewalrus\_3](#): > > Front porch is maybe not quite the right word. I tend to call the area outside of any residence’s front door the “front porch”. > > It was an apartment that opened to the outside. My shoes and another guest’s were on the walkway outside the front door, just next to the welcome mat. You leave your shoes outside in the hallway of an apartment building? ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/24 "2011-02-26T03:46:31Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > Western homes, unfortunately for those who have a shoes-off policy, don’t have such spaces. Some do, and you can build such a space into most existing houses. There are many good reasons to build an [entrance room](http://vasarhelyi.eu/books/A_pattern_language_book/apl130/apl130.htm), in addition to facilitating the not-wearing of shoes. (Many American houses have front halls which can be made to serve much the same purposes, even if they’re not stepped down from the rest of the level.) For example, people arriving and departing may have packages, and need to set these down while they don or doff not only shoes but coats, hats, whatever. There should be a table or shelf of some kind within a couple paces of the door. There needs to be a place to sit down, also within a couple paces. And so on. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/25 "2011-02-26T03:46:48Z")
Annoying. When I put together an outfit, chances are I’m not thinking about how it will look in socks. Damn those wet blankets trying to stop me from rocking my shiny knee highs! ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/26 "2011-02-26T04:02:56Z")
I have a related question. My house is neither shoes on or shoes off. I don’t put shoes on unless I have to go somewhere but I never make people take off their shoes if they’re at my house because for me, shoes off is just a personal preference. My husband grew up in a shoes on house\* and whenever we go visit the ILs, everybody else is wearing shoes except for me and the kids. Am I being rude by not wearing shoes? It never, ever occurred to me until now that I might be. \*I really just figured they were more formal…his parents are of the generation where you shower and get dressed before you make breakfast too. I find it totally weird. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/27 "2011-02-26T04:09:47Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > You leave your shoes outside in the hallway of an apartment building? This is really common in buildings in NYC in inclement weather. Apartments are small, your floors are pre-war parquet and your winter boots are wet and salty so everyone dumps their boots and umbrellas in the hallways. The supers HATED it. Everytime there was rain or snow, the notices started going up. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/28 "2011-02-26T04:11:56Z")
> [@Sue\_Duhnym](#): > > Am I being rude by not wearing shoes? It is at least very slightly insensitive. Within private homes, guests should conform to the norms of their hosts, whichever way that goes. When a guest is _told_ these norms and complains about them, or doesn’t comply, that is definitely rude. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/29 "2011-02-26T04:36:35Z")
This whole shoes-off thing is so bizarre to me. I have never in my life been inside a house where guests had to take off their shoes. The only place I ever hear it being done is here on the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/30 "2011-02-26T05:12:36Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > This whole shoes-off thing is so bizarre to me. I have never in my life been inside a house where guests had to take off their shoes. The only place I ever hear it being done is here on the SDMB. When we visit someone else’s house here, we automatically stop and take off our shoes (when visiting in the US, we ask about the shoes, since we are aware that it is not the tradition everywhere). Last time we were at a house party, I was tempted to take a picture of the ranks of shoes to post in a thread just such as this. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![gone2thedogs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c67d28/32.png) [@gone2thedogs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gone2thedogs)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/31 "2011-02-26T05:26:16Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > :shrug: We are a whatever you want to do house. And we live in snow at least 6 months out of the year. Sure, we have mud season, and I might even take my shoes off after walking the dogs. > > Snow is just moisture where I live. In the deep of winter there is no dirt or anything else mixed in with it. Drives me crazy when people expect their guests to take off their shoes. I think it’s very rude (and uncomfortable [for me] to boot). Like enipla I think it extremely rude to come into my house and remove your shoes. I would be horrified if anyone did this and be quite perplexed as to how to tell them how offended I was. I don’t want anyone’s dirty feet, sox or not in my house. Your shoes and outside dirt I can handle. ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/32 "2011-02-26T05:39:38Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > This whole shoes-off thing is so bizarre to me. I have never in my life been inside a house where guests had to take off their shoes. The only place I ever hear it being done is here on the SDMB. Whilst pretty much the whole of western Canada is shoes-off, you shouldn’t think of it as being required to not wear shoes - just required to not wear your outside shoes. If you visit someplace and bring slippers or even clean inside shoes, no one will mind. It’s just that most people don’t bother. What I find bizarre is that anyone would think it appropriate to enter a home with snowy shoes and leave wet tracks all over the place. And don’t say you’d wipe your shoes - pretty much any shoes that are remotely suitable for wearing outside in a western Canadian winter will not be wiped clean, as they will have tread designs full of crevasses packed with snow. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/33 "2011-02-26T08:00:26Z")
> [@gone2thedogs](#): > > Like enipla I think it extremely rude to come into my house and remove your shoes. I would be horrified if anyone did this and be quite perplexed as to how to tell them how offended I was. I don’t want anyone’s dirty feet, sox or not in my house. Your shoes and outside dirt I can handle. This attitude is completely foreign to me. Where do you live that outside dirt is cleaner than feet? My floors are mopped and/or vacuumed at least weekly and I take showers daily but, with my shoes, I regularly walk on sidewalks where dogs defecate. You honestly think a person’s feet are dirtier than the bottom of their shoes? ---
**Author:** ![Carmady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f04885/32.png) [@Carmady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carmady)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/34 "2011-02-26T08:19:03Z")
I’ve only ever been to one house where the hosts asked guests to take their shoes off. After that, I avoided going there. Years later I had to go back, and found they had changed their policy and guests no longer had to strip off their shoes to enter. Oddly, I never wear shoes at my own house. But I am quite uncomfortable taking them off when visiting someone I am not intimate with. ---
**Author:** ![Norse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a9adbd/32.png) [@Norse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Norse)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/35 "2011-02-26T12:17:46Z")
> [@gone2thedogs](#): > > Like enipla I think it extremely rude to come into my house and remove your shoes. I would be horrified if anyone did this and be quite perplexed as to how to tell them how offended I was. I don’t want anyone’s dirty feet, sox or not in my house. Your shoes and outside dirt I can handle. You’re joking, right? I sort of thought I heard a kind of whooshing sound here :dubious: FTR: In Scandinavia, the norm in private homes is “shoes off” and it’s generally considered rude to walk into someone’s home with your (often dirty) shoes on. Unless you’re attending a party and have dressed up for it, you’re generally expected to take off your shoes. It’s more common that the outside is wet and/or muddy and/or snowy, and nobody here likes sand, grit and mud all over their floors. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/36 "2011-02-26T12:44:34Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > This whole shoes-off thing is so bizarre to me. I have never in my life been inside a house where guests had to take off their shoes. The only place I ever hear it being done is here on the SDMB. It is very common in Russia and other former Soviet nations, as well as many countries in Asia. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/37 "2011-02-26T14:36:52Z")
> [@gone2thedogs](#): > > Like enipla I think it extremely rude to come into my house and remove your shoes. I would be horrified if anyone did this and be quite perplexed as to how to tell them how offended I was. I don’t want anyone’s dirty feet, sox or not in my house. Your shoes and outside dirt I can handle. That’s not what I meant. I think it’s rude for the hosts to ask their guests to remove their shoes (unless of course they are muddy, or extra wet). In this case I really think the host should accomadate the guest. I don’t mind if a guest takes their shoes off, but it seems a little familiar. Like changing into PJ’s or something. If I’m just lounging around in my house, like now, I’ll have my shoes off. Once I get my day going, even if I’m not going to leave, it’s shoes on. More comfortable for me for walking. I often come into my house with snow on my shoes, I just knock it off as best as I can. A little moisture on my carpet doesn’t hurt it. And in anycase, it’s nothing compared to having two dogs that have a doggie door and come and go as they please. We have had a number of threads on this, and I really doubt either side will change their mind. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/38 "2011-02-26T16:12:55Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > You leave your shoes outside in the hallway of an apartment building? Well, _I_ didn’t. But, yes, that’s where they were placed. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/39 "2011-02-26T16:36:05Z")
> [@iamthewalrus\_3](#): > > Well, _I_ didn’t. But, yes, that’s where they were placed. That just seems really strange that they can’t have a throw rug or something actually in the apartment for people to leave their shoes. While my Wife was getting ready to leave this morning she must have come in and out 4 or 5 times. She was wearing lightweight hiking boots. Pretty typical around here when there is snow on the ground (or not). Now this is SNOW and ice. Not slush, not mud. It’s really very clean. Anyway – -Go out to start car. Come back in. -Go out to brush snow off. Come back in. -Go out . Come back in because she forgot gloves. -Go out and leave. -I think I missed something in there. Perhaps she took something to her car. Now, it’s not like she is hiking down the block or anything. The car is right off our (snow covered) deck in our driveway. She sure as heck isn’t going to take her boots on and off 4-5 times just because they may get an ounce of water on the carpet. That’s just silly. We had -31F about 3 weeks ago. Yes we pre-warm our cars, and no we don’t change into slippers when we come back in. We live in a home, not an operating room or museum. For us, it’s just not worth it to take your boots on and off every time you step outside. So it follows that we have a shoes on house. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2011, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612/40 "2011-02-26T19:08:16Z")
I was surprised by several posts in this thread, but agree that this one almost has to be a woosh: > [@gone2thedogs](#): > > Like enipla I think it extremely rude to come into my house and remove your shoes. I would be horrified if anyone did this and be quite perplexed as to how to tell them how offended I was. I don’t want anyone’s dirty feet, sox or not in my house. Your shoes and outside dirt I can handle. “The street grime and turd dust you’ve picked up on your shoes is fine, but don’t you dare put your freshly bathed feet on _my_ floor!” :smack: Our house is the opposite of the one OP visited. Every visitor places his shoes outside unasked. I move the shoes inside because of the risk our puppies will think they smell delicious! 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/taking-shoes-off-etiquette/572612.md?page=3)