# Talk about avoiding reality. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 9, 2012, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615 "2012-06-09T13:57:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/41 "2012-06-10T11:30:57Z")
Let me ask the question again: Does anybody believe that this board will help **quasimodem** retain his real life social skills? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/42 "2012-06-10T11:44:10Z")
> [@Mtgman](#): > > There’s no upside to beating up a kid in a wheelchair. The kinda wheelchair with a motor, or that you have to power yourself?😕 ---
**Author:** ![Myrnalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/43 "2012-06-10T11:50:31Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > The assholes who knew about **Quasi** ’s condition could have ignored him. Instead they goaded him. **I hope I’m alive long enough to see them deteriorate so I can laugh at them.** Um wow, ok. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/44 "2012-06-10T11:56:48Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Let me ask the question again: Does anybody believe that this board will help **quasimodem** retain his real life social skills? Is it going to help you get some? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/45 "2012-06-10T12:38:12Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Let me ask the question again: Does anybody believe that this board will help **quasimodem** retain his real life social skills? Yes, seeing as keeping the brain working has been shown to fight of dementia. You’d know that if you weren’t just try to rationalize your own bigotry. That’s what the entire tough love bullshit all is–how can I justify to myself an action I know is immoral. The person who the OP is so mad about was trying to make a guy who was obviously getting so fucking depressed that he was thinking of giving up some encouragement to try to make him feel better. That’s what the OP is pitting: being a decent human being. It was likewise clear from **Quasi** ’s first post that he wasn’t quite understanding what was going on. Mhendo decided that he was mad enough to rationalize away beating up on someone who obviously was in trouble. Mhendo beat up on a defenseless old man–just like in real life, no one can get mad when the old man starts throwing punches. But then Quasi felt so bad about it that he felt he had to quit. Because of **mhendo** , Quasi may die earlier than he was supposed to. At least the OP’s pittee was trying to make him feel better. I not only share Tripolar’s beliefs on this matter, but I would add to it if I were sure it wouldn’t get me a Warning. Because, as I said in the other thread, mhendo, and people like him, aren’t worth it. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/46 "2012-06-10T12:45:34Z")
> [@Mtgman](#): > > So there are two kids on a playground. One is in a wheelchair, and the other is a normal able-bodied kid. The one in the wheelchair is a real little shit. Constantly mouthing off, rolling over people’s toes, throwing dodgeballs at people during recess, etc. God what a a little fuck. So one day, in response to one of these little acts of assholery, the able bodied kid just punches him in the face. The wheelchair falls over and the little shit starts flopping around on the ground, throwing whatever little rocks and things he can get his hands on at the other kid. A foul stream of curses accompanies the rocks. This further angers the able bodied young man so he starts kicking the paraplegic. Eventually the fight is broken up. > > And the able bodied kid is now the kid who beat up the kid in the wheelchair. > > Sure there was provocation, sure no one would have even remembered the incident if it had occurred between two able bodied kids, especially if one of them was an angry little shit like the wheelchair bound kid was. > > But the other kid is still the guy who beat up the kid in the wheelchair. > > Discretion remains the better part of valor. The little shit may have deserved it, may have asked for, nay been begging for it. > > But the victor is still the kid who beat up the kid in the wheelchair. > > There’s no upside to beating up a kid in a wheelchair. It’s a failure of imagination. A failure to subdue your own ego long enough to walk away or find another resolution. It’s unnecessary. It’s never the only reasonable course of action. While it may be rationalized, it’s _never_ **necessary**. > > Enjoy, > Steven I wish I could have written something like this. But this shit makes me so angry that I can’t do calm rational stuff like that. The guy who beats up the kid in the wheelchair is just such a horrible person that I can’t say anything about them without wanting to hurt them. Heck, I got so mad that I’ve had to stay away from the thread, and would have this one if I’d known what it was about. For all I know mhendo has apologized. And the OP of this thread and a couple others may yet apologize. So I will, after this, continue to treat them like human beings instead of the single-celled organisms I think they are now. But, gah, I can’t understand how anyone can even think this way. Especially people who have shown themselves to be compassionate people in general. I thought the way people jumped on **Farmer Jane** or **Ambivalid** was bad, but at least they could defend themselves. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/47 "2012-06-10T12:58:06Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > But then Quasi felt so bad about it that he felt he had to quit. Because of **mhendo** , Quasi \*\*may die \*\*earlier than he was supposed to. At least the OP’s pittee was trying to make him feel better. Oh for crying out loud! You know, I love this place and don’t like to see anyone get piled on, but this is just ridiculous. I hope Quasi won’t leave over this, but he does not need to be coddled and he does need to watch his damn temper. Threats of physical violence are never okay and he needs to understand that. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/48 "2012-06-10T13:14:32Z")
The thing is, he clearly (eventually) realized he’d been inappropriate and essentially suspended himself. In that thread he makes a comment about staying out of the Pit. There’s a grey area between mollycoddling and pretending the disabled aren’t disabled. The wheelchair analogy is really poor simply because cognitive disabilities are a different order of creature from physical disabilities. Can’t walk? Well, that’s a pretty obvious set of limitations. This is different, both in what it is and the fact that it ebbs and flows. Nobody should get a pass on the “being a jerk” rule, even if it’s “being a jerk due to illness.” On the other hand, basic compassion says that his consequences for being a jerk should be different than someone who has been a jerk because he’s an asshole. **Q** has basically been suspended for his meltdown. Whether he did it or the Mods did it is irrelevant, really, and as **Oakminster** says, he may not even be back. ---
**Author:** ![stolatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@stolatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stolatt)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/49 "2012-06-10T13:16:22Z")
Nicely put TriPolar. While I love reading the Dope and it is by far the best message board evah, I don’t live and breathe by it. It’s strictly for entertainment and some of you are pissed that a poster would affect your entertainment with some hardcore real life shit. If you don’t have any idea how ridiculous that is, then I fucking guarantee it’s you who needs a break. I look at it this way. My father in law is 87. If he wants something, I get it for him. If he thinks something, I respect it. Because I’ll be on this planet for a long time after him and I have to live with how I treated him for the final years of his life. All of you will outlive Quasi, lucky for you. You’ll live long enough to be embarrassed at the judgement you passed on him. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/50 "2012-06-10T13:16:59Z")
Heh-more of BigTard’s patented “Anyone with any handicap should be able to get away with anything” jackassery. Sorry, no. Quasi deserves the respect of being treated like an adult, not like a pet. The mods have been kind enough to take Quasi’s condition into account and not banned him for repeated outside-the-pit meltdowns and the sorts of threats of violence that would have gotten anyone else instabanned, and I think that’s kind of them and appropriate. However, whoever up thread said the board doesn’t have to be wrapped in cotton to avoid Quasi bumping into sharp corners was exactly right. He deserves some consideration, he does not deserve to be treated like a pet. And–for you olde timers, can you imagine BigTard’s reaction to the treatment Handy got? OP: My boyfriend’s condom broke last night–is there a douche I can use to avoid getting pregnant? Handy: The first post on Google says pickle brine and coca-cola can be used as a douche to avoid pregnancy Everyone else: NO IT CAN’T! BigTard: STOP PICKING ON HANDY! HE’S DEAF AND YOU ALL HATE HIM (and, by extension me. ☹ ) BECAUSE OF HIS HANDICAP! HE HAS RIGHTS! EVEN IF HE _IS_ POSTING DANGEROUS MEDICAL MISINFORMATION! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/51 "2012-06-10T13:26:08Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Because of **mhendo** , Quasi may die earlier than he was supposed to. Wuh? ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/52 "2012-06-10T13:39:05Z")
> [@Autolycus](#): > > Geez, how fucking hard is it to cut a guy with Alzheimers a little slack? If anything, I’m in favor of cutting other posters with personality orders slack, not hoisting **Quasi** over the coals. Most people with personality disorders don’t know it. And people who are insane, by definition, do not know they insane. So why not just assume everyone is mentally ill? If we cut everyone slack we’ll never have to be mad again. ---
**Author:** ![Myrnalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/53 "2012-06-10T13:59:08Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > But then Quasi felt so bad about it that he felt he had to quit. Because of **mhendo** , Quasi may die earlier than he was supposed to. Oh, sweet blithering fuck. Can _you_ go on a posting sabbatical? _ **Please?** _ ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/54 "2012-06-10T15:29:07Z")
A couple of questions: Has anyone doubted **Quasi’s** claims? How long has he been here? I like to give people the benefit of the doubt…but watching him deteriorate over the year has been a little unnerving. Sometimes it’s not even believable. His…enthusiasm is awkward. I sometimes imagine him to be Tom Cruise jumping on a couch. While **mhendo** was being a jerk in that thread, so was **Quasi**. And it’s the Pit, so it’s allowed. We don’t give people with mental disorders a pass. Hell, we’ve allowed people who were suicidal on this board get flamed. It’s not right to pick on a guy with Alzheimer’s, but people with dementia can get really nasty. It would appear that **Quasi** can hold his own (what with his numerous physical threats to posters and all) on the Internet. It’s also my understanding that **Quasi** has been doing this for years. Years. So of course someone’s bound to get irritated eventually. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/55 "2012-06-10T19:17:36Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > I wish I could have written something like this. Oh, you could have, because it’s a bunch of blithering sanctimonious nonsense. It’s right up your wheedling idiotic alley. **Quasi** lashed out _with words_. **mhendo** retaliated _with words_. Physical assault is not an appropriate analogy. If **Quasi** shouldn’t be held responsible for what he says, then he needs supervision. Unfettered access to the internet is a _bad_ thing, because the internet is a shitty place. He might weep tears over how we’re all one big family, but we’re not, especially in the Pit. If it wasn’t **mhendo** , it could well have been someone else taking him to task. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/56 "2012-06-10T19:28:52Z")
> [@Myrnalene](#): > > Oh, sweet blithering fuck. Can _you_ go on a posting sabbatical? _ **Please?** _ Classy. Because you posted this, BigT is going to die several days earlier than he otherwise would have. I hope you can live with yourself, murderer. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/57 "2012-06-10T19:37:10Z")
> [@Farmer\_Jane](#): > > A couple of questions: > > Has anyone doubted **Quasi’s** claims? > How long has he been here? The second question is easy to answer: his profile has a join date of December, 2000, so 11½ years. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/58 "2012-06-10T21:01:01Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Y Because of **mhendo** , Quasi may die earlier than he was supposed to. Christ. You’re an even bigger retard than I thought. I mean, seriously, SERIOUSLY fucking retarded. I can imagine **BigT** as the type who, if he worked in a nursing home, would talk to all of the residents in baby-talk, and treat them like children. “Now, did we have a nice lunch today, Mrs. Stevens? How about we go and watch some nice tv now? Would you like that?” Ugh. Seriously, dude, if you acted like that to my grandma (she doesn’t have dementia, but she’s 93 and in really bad health), she’d smack the crap out of you. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/59 "2012-06-10T22:16:11Z")
This thread has taken days off my life. You’re all murdering, life stealing bastards! (Immediately sulks off to Superscience Lair to formulate the ultimate life stealing internet post.) ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615/60 "2012-06-10T22:16:50Z")
**Quasi** is well known here, and has been posting regularly for over a decade. His deterioration in the last few years is clearly notable, follows typical patterns of a progressive dementia, and has been painful to many of us. **Quasi** stated quite clearly after he received his diagnosis that he didn’t wish for special treatment on this board because of his disease. I feel we should respect that. Nothing anyone posts here is going to shorten, or lengthen his life. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/talk-about-avoiding-reality/624615.md?page=4)