# Teaching kids about privilege. Or should I just kill them now? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 15, 2020, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832 "2020-04-15T07:42:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/1 "2020-04-15T07:42:31Z")
We live in Aus with a comfortable roof over our heads, food in the fridge and on the table, a stable internet connection, Netflix, hot water and a reliable car. Education and health care are essentially free. For those who are unemployed, there is a fortnightly payment to get us through the tough times ahead. I’m very grateful to be an Aussie at the moment, fuckups and shit from our govt notwithstanding. Anyway, the grandkids are being cunts, bemoaning every last thing about their version of the ‘End of Days’. I need some media stuff to show them that they live in one of the most privileged places in the most privileged of times. Links please? Or I’ll just kill them… ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/2 "2020-04-15T08:06:18Z")
[Perhaps start with _Back In Time For Dinner_](https://iview.abc.net.au/show/back-in-time-for-dinner/) on the good old ABC. It takes a look back at not just the food in various decades back, but a little bit about domestic chores, food prep, and social roles. Starts in the '50s, and quite absorbing. That’s a gentle introduction. You can go onto various wartime documentaries (especially WWI), descriptions of cholera pandemics, and so forth. If any are into cars, talk about car maintenance in Ye Olden Days of tune-ups, adjusting timing, and so forth. Really, right now we live a life that kings and queens of only a very short time ago could only look on to with envy. Not to mention billions living right now. So much easier and more comfortable. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/3 "2020-04-15T08:27:33Z")
My parents regularly berated my brothers and me at dinner time for failing to appreciate how good life was for us. We heard all about life during the Great Depression, post WWI eastern Europe, and all about the kids in Africa who starved because I didn’t finish my vegetables. That really made me appreciate my life :rolleyes:😕 ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/4 "2020-04-15T08:58:22Z")
I’d tried the whole ‘you don’t know how good you have it’ thing, we donated things to refugees, did a reverse advent calendar to the food bank. The only thing that really hit home was when I agreed to buy a lady a juice when she approached me in the local service station (there is a refuge and a assisted living centre nearby, she could have been from either one). I think because it happened right in front of them - her asking and me thinking about it for a second and then agreeing - that it had as big an impact as it did. They kept on circling back to it for weeks. So the only thing I can suggest is teaching by demonstration. Hard at the moment I know! ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/5 "2020-04-15T14:42:07Z")
> [@galen\_ubal](#): > > [Perhaps start with _Back In Time For Dinner_](https://iview.abc.net.au/show/back-in-time-for-dinner/) on the good old ABC. It takes a look back at not just the food in various decades back, but a little bit about domestic chores, food prep, and social roles. Starts in the '50s, and quite absorbing. > That’s a gentle introduction. You can go onto various wartime documentaries (especially WWI), descriptions of cholera pandemics, and so forth. > If any are into cars, talk about car maintenance in Ye Olden Days of tune-ups, adjusting timing, and so forth. > Really, right now we live a life that kings and queens of only a very short time ago could only look on to with envy. Not to mention billions living right now. So much easier and more comfortable. Eh, who cares how people lived back then? That’s old news. Ancient history. Irrelevant in the life of a modern kid. Showing how people lived before anyone had access to computers (and before that tv. And before that refrigeration. And before that vaccines. etc etc etc) won’t make an impact. Gotta show them what life is like for people today who don’t have access to X Y and Z while the kids themselves enjoy plentiful access. Don’t know the best way to go about that but I wanted to pop in and give my opinion on the first response here 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/6 "2020-04-15T14:48:41Z")
In general, trying to instill a sense of gratitude this way (“think of the starving kids in Africa,” “when we were your age, we didn’t have…”) almost never works - if anything, backfires. Some attitudes, or gratitude, can only be learned on one’s own. They’ll either find it some day on their own or they will not. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/7 "2020-04-15T15:01:53Z")
I don’t think kids can really get it unless they’ve experienced life “unprivileged”. Of course you can lecture them about it, but it’s likely going to fall on deaf ears. If you don’t mind the inconvenience, perhaps you can give them a taste of life without luxuries. Turn off the wifi without them knowing and don’t “fix” it until they’ve had a full eight hours without it. Or do the same thing to the AC. But better yet, why not train them out of their cunty ways? Maybe you can set up a complaint jar; if anyone utters a single complaint, they have to put money in the jar. Or you can require that every complaint made in your presence be followed up by an expression of gratitude. I think being a cunt should be treatedly separately from any lesson on privilege. Tons of sweet, kind people live in privileged bubbles. And tons of dicks and cunts understand privilege very well, but they are still dicks and cunts who don’t know when to STFU. ---
**Author:** ![The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_King_of_Soup)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/8 "2020-04-15T15:16:13Z")
Fall back on the bromide, “Children rarely listen to their parents, and rarely fail to imitate them.” If you can demonstrate gratitude, or selflessness, or tolerance, in a non-performative manner, it will probably work. The effect is slow, and none of us have virtues that are 100% reliable all the time, but it saves you the effort and frustration of preaching, and saves you also from accusations of hypocrisy. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/9 "2020-04-15T16:09:58Z")
I’d say it’s all or nothing. Throw them into the deep end, make them watch videos of when the allies entered the Nazi death camps, and of the aftermath of Hiroshima (slightly less grisly, maybe, there’s a famous animated feature about the latter, sorry I don’t remember the name of it). All those commercials for charities that actually show the starving children with flies crawling on them. Or don’t, and just lead by example as **The King of Soup** suggested. If it were me, though, I would add a rule: “You are entitled to your feelings, and I am entitled not to hear about them. So no complaining on penalty of …” and this is where you have to have some means of enforcement. If you’re the grandparents and the parents are there, you’re screwed. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/10 "2020-04-15T16:15:59Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > Anyway, the grandkids are being cunts, 😃 First laugh of the day. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2020, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/11 "2020-04-15T16:28:23Z")
I always let mine moan and groan during pity-parties. When they were done I’d tell they living under my roof at my discretion. And that’s one privilege I could remove from their lives, if I saw fit. I’d told them to grow up and change the world if they hated it so bad. I know fully it was myself who spoiled them. My baby is 21yo. I say they turned out okay. Except: We just had a 3 day power outtage due to weather. They were like ravenous wolves for internet availability. Sad. I don’t know what you could show them. Maybe ‘Oliver Twist’ or ‘Great Expectations’ Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![OleOneEye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f14d63/32.png) [@OleOneEye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OleOneEye)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/12 "2020-04-16T03:45:06Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > If you don’t mind the inconvenience, perhaps you can give them a taste of life without luxuries. Turn off the wifi without them knowing and don’t “fix” it until they’ve had a full eight hours without it. Or do the same thing to the AC. Nah, this just teaches kids it’s okay to play petty power games. ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/13 "2020-04-16T03:52:59Z")
> [@Socrates](#): > > “The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.” Sounds like this problem has been going on for some time. Maybe in another 2400 years and we’ll get it figured out. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/14 "2020-04-16T03:53:46Z")
IDK, but my sister-in-law has a habit of responding to every ‘I want’ statement from one of her kids with ‘well, _ **I** _ want a million dollars and a trip to Tahiti’. Which at least leads a whinger with pretty much nowhere to go. Tell us what the g-kids’ favourite whingy phrases are and I bet we, collectively, could fit you up with some good gob-stoppers ---
**Author:** ![OleOneEye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f14d63/32.png) [@OleOneEye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OleOneEye)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/15 "2020-04-16T04:08:26Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > IDK, but my sister-in-law has a habit of responding to every ‘I want’ statement from one of her kids with ‘well, _ **I** _ want a million dollars and a trip to Tahiti’. Instead of belittling someone’s feelings, wouldn’t it be better to brainstorm with the kid how they could (eventually) get what they want? This thread is depressing. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/16 "2020-04-16T04:33:06Z")
Humour doesn’t come through very well on teh internets… ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/17 "2020-04-16T07:19:41Z")
Free healthcare and education will mean less than nothing to them, unfortunately. You only realise that your school days were indeed the best days of your life (in terms of free time and lack of responsibility) when they’re long past, and I think it’s futile (and probably counterproductive) to try and drum that into kids. Having said that, I did pick up at a reasonably early age (like, maybe 10 or so?) that counting ones blessings is a great way to get on in life, and I think that’s because it was something my father often said - not in a preachy way, just that he himself was obviously very comfortable and happy in life. Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/18 "2020-04-16T07:26:23Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > IDK, but my sister-in-law has a habit of responding to every ‘I want’ statement from one of her kids with ‘well, _ **I** _ want a million dollars and a trip to Tahiti’. I’ll have to remember this one when my cats are wanting something: My cats: Meow, meow, meow! Meow! Me: I want a million dollars and a trip to Tahiti. It won’t do anything for the cats, but it will make me feel a lot better than just complaining “What the @#$% do you want?” at the cats. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/19 "2020-04-16T08:36:31Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > IDK, but my sister-in-law has a habit of responding to every ‘I want’ statement from one of her kids with ‘well, _ **I** _ want a million dollars and a trip to Tahiti’. Which at least leads a whinger with pretty much nowhere to go. > > Tell us what the g-kids’ favourite whingy phrases are and I bet we, collectively, could fit you up with some good gob-stoppers At the moment it’s ‘I’m bored, can I get Roblox, dinner sucks, I’m bored, I can’t draw stuff, schoolwork sucks, I’m TIRED, can I have an avo, bacon and tomato toastie for breakfast, I’m too tired to make my own breakfast…’ Good times 🤣🤣 ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2020, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832/20 "2020-04-16T11:01:59Z")
My mind’s blanking on anything but the good old traditional “nice to meet you, Bored. I’m Nanna!” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teaching-kids-about-privilege-or-should-i-just-kill-them-now/851832.md?page=2)