# Team Building Exercise **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 24, 2010, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849 "2010-09-24T04:11:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/61 "2010-09-27T19:13:51Z")
> [@Omi\_no\_Kami](#): > > My friend’s dad is the head of a 30-some person IT department in a small company. This is his story. > > So he was having a fairly average day going about the business of running a department, when he got a call from his boss, who told him that they were paying for each department to go out and do a 3-day team building event, and that his guys were going next week. No wages, of course, but he was nice enough to give everyone in the department a $50 “participation bonus”. So the dad, being fairly accomplished with laying back and thinking of England, shrugs and goes to share the bad news with his team. > > Fast forward to the day of the event, where they are required to show up at the office at 5am (!), and quickly herded into vans and driven for three straight hours into the middle of nowhere. Turns out, the “team-building” exercise was going to be survival training with a bunch of corporate BS thrown in on the side, so not only would they get to spend three days doing stupid crap, they were not to be allowed to go home until they had finished. > > I guess it was supposed to be one of those “Overcome adversity and weather shared hardship to build a better team,” I don’t really know. But in any case, by the time they got to the campsite, his guys were _pissed_. They’re introduced to the instructor, who starts the event by assuring everyone that he understands they don’t want to be there, but ultimately it will be good for them and blah blah blah horseshit blah. He then proceeds to put five aluminum cans on sawhorse about 30 feet away from the group and produces a small handgun: the schtick will be that each guy gets three shots at the cans, and anyone who manages to hit a can will get to go home right now. Predictably, most of the department have never shot a gun, so the activity goes as planned and most people miss all of their shots, until it gets to my friend’s father. > > Now the father was probably well over 400 pounds, a chain smoker, and disdained most forms of exercise. He also happened to be a crack shot with a pistol, and had apparently done pretty well in state and national marksmanship competitions over the last twenty years, and decided he was going to screw with the guy a bit. His first shot was a bit wide, but with his second he accomplished what he was trying to do, and managed to knock the can over without pushing it off the sawhorse. Satisfied that he’d shown off enough, he casually fired a third shot to knock it off… …and knocked the can upright again. He said that the instructor just kind of stared at him for a moment, and then told them that screw it, with that performance they all deserved to get a free pass. > > So about 2/3 of the participants elected to go home and watch TV or hang out with their kids or do whatever IT people do with their time. Apparently management was very happy with how much morale it built. 🙂 Pretty good story, but I was plumping for one of the pissed-off co-workers to take advantage of the fact that he was holding a loaded weapon and ordering the immediate return of the party to civilization. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/62 "2010-09-27T19:40:04Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > > [@aruvqan](#): > > > > All I actually want from a job is to be properly trained, then left the fuck alone to actually do my damned job. I do not need any warm fuzzies, just actual monetary bonuses now and again. > > Quoted for truth. Re-quoted for WTF? Seriously, I’m not demanding pony rides and kewpie dolls, but I spend a good part of my waking life at work. I don’t want it to be just drudgery with a pay-check at the end of it. I do like my job. And, for the most part, I like the people I work with. A few of them are honest to Buddha friends. I just don’t get the “leave me alone and give me my paycheck” attitude. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/63 "2010-09-27T19:54:15Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > > [@Fenris](#): > > > > Quoted for truth. > > Re-quoted for WTF? > > Seriously, I’m not demanding pony rides and kewpie dolls, but I spend a good part of my waking life at work. I don’t want it to be just drudgery with a pay-check at the end of it. > > I do like my job. And, for the most part, I like the people I work with. A few of them are honest to Buddha friends. I just don’t get the “leave me alone and give me my paycheck” attitude. Good for you! Now go away and let me get my work done. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/64 "2010-09-27T19:54:55Z")
Gee. My company has never done any team-building exercises. But then, we don’t do birthday and holiday celebrations, either. Or performance reviews. Or raises. Or bonuses. ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/65 "2010-09-27T19:56:42Z")
Jack - some very highly skilled and highly paid people that drive an awful lot of shareholder value for a company just want to be left the fuck alone. And there is another group of people that hate having to turn on the rah rah rah cheerleader shit. There’s nothing wrong with being in either of the above groups or in \*both \*of the above groups. It’s the way they are wired. Seriously, nothing wrong with the above just as there’s nothing wrong with someone that loves organizing group dancing. It’s all part of workplace diversity. And I think the key is that an awful lot of team building organizers forget this fact. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/66 "2010-09-27T20:04:49Z")
> [@Sattua](#): > > Gee. My company has never done any team-building exercises. But then, we don’t do birthday and holiday celebrations, either. Or performance reviews. Or raises. Or bonuses. Would you like fries with that? ---
**Author:** ![Robb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a183cd/32.png) [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/67 "2010-09-27T20:19:46Z")
One year, TPTB selected paintball as a team-building exercise. I think team building starts well when it highlights the disparity in income between us and the bosses. We got to use rented paintball guns. I remember marveling at its inaccuracy as it acted like a single-pellet shotgun. The return fire came from fully-automatic guns with rifled barrels. Paintball retains an element from our childhood games - the person tagged needs to agree and play dead. It sadden me to realize I worked for a guy who would rather become a Pollock painting than admit defeat. I still wonder what I learned that day. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/68 "2010-09-27T20:20:37Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > > [@Fenris](#): > > > > Quoted for truth. > > Re-quoted for WTF? > > Seriously, I’m not demanding pony rides and kewpie dolls, but I spend a good part of my waking life at work. I don’t want it to be just drudgery with a pay-check at the end of it. > > I do like my job. And, for the most part, I like the people I work with. A few of them are honest to Buddha friends. I just don’t get the “leave me alone and give me my paycheck” attitude. Rule 1: There’s no such thing as a non-mandatory team-building exercise. If they’re telling you it’s non-mandatory, they’re _lying_. Even if non-participation puts a tiny little mental check-box next to the “not a good team player” line in their minds, non-participation will have an effect. Rule 2: Every fucking minute that I have to do mandatory non-job related crap is [list=a] [li]…time that I’ll have to make up later. This may not be true in middle management where no-one actually produces anything but in a normal job, lack of work means work undone, not just less papers shuffled around. (Or illegal–if you’re an hourly worker and they make you come in to do “fun” for unpaid hours, this is against most state’s labor laws. If you’re salary, you’re screwed. Totally legal)[/li][li]…money that I’m not getting. The 50 pizzas you ordered x the 2 hours of wasted wages from everyone stopping work to eat the pizzas is money that could have been given to me to spend as I saw fit. Including going out to lunch with co-workers I like.[/li][li]…often incredibly intrusive. I’m not going to fall back into someone’s arms, I’m not taking some half-assed, phony “psychological test” to be shared with a group which would certainly have job consequences (and the last time they tried that stunt, I asked if the person giving the test was psychologist licensed with the state and familiar with HIPPA laws about employee privacy.) [/li][li]…fucking wastes of time. “Write a recipe about how you like your co-workers” (Take 2 cups of love, 1 cup of hard work…etc) or “We’re going to blindfold everyone on your team except one person who will direct the rest of the team to build a lego structure. Ho-ho-ho! It’s HARD to give instructions, isn’t it? Isn’t it good to work as a TEAM to accomplish this?” (First instruction? “Take off your damned blindfolds. I don’t believe in intentionally handicapping myself”). [/li][/list] Look–I don’t hate my job, I like my fellow workers, I have a great reputation as someone who can generally get along with any other worker—just shut up and let me do my job. _I’ll_ decide who/how I want to have fun with and when, not some suit who wants to put a check-mark by the “Did “team building” exercise” box on his performance evaluation by assigning mandatory “fun”. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/69 "2010-09-27T20:48:41Z")
Well … all I can say is that our last team building exercise, the head of my department – who I like personally – gave a speech which contained the following sentence: “If you’re not having fun at work, my advice to you is to quit.” And I pretty much agree with him. And again, not fun in a woohoo kind of way, but in a I like going to work kind of way. For me, I enjoy a little extracurricular activity every now and again … even if it’s something goofy. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/70 "2010-09-27T21:37:35Z")
The head of your department sounds like a tremendous douche _IF_ the context was forced fun and/or “teambuilding” crap–has he ever heard of “false dilemmas”? (If that wasn’t the context then nevermind). It’s quite possible to enjoy your job and your co-workers without liking the painful forced “fun” or teambuilding crap. I like going to work. I like my job. I do it well. I like finding processes that will make my job quicker/easier to perform and/or save the company money. I have no objections to people deciding “Hey, we like each other–let’s grab lunch today” or “Hey, you guys want to grab dinner and a movie after work?” I think it’s swell and I’ll occasionally participate. What I don’t like is the grim forced jolliness of mandatory “fun”. ("We’ve hired a body-paint artist to come around and paint your face the way your team members describe you. We’ll give YOU a grumpy-face and YOU a happy-clown face! 😃 ") What I especially resent is being pulled away from my job for bullshit teambuilding crap like hugging my co-workers and whispering one thing “special” about them in their ear as part of a “bonding” exercise. I don’t like being told to make up advertising jingles that I’ll then recite for the team. I will never, EVER fall back into someone’s arms because my boss says to. None of those things are remotely in my job description and the “…or other duties, as required” clause specifically does NOT cover most of these crackpot, bullshit ideas. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/71 "2010-09-27T22:12:04Z")
I worked at the campus coffeeshops in college. We had a big gathering every year of all of the Union staff together to do stupid teambuilding shit. This always involved the Union pledge. One year, I ended it with a click of my heels and one hand stuck up in front of me with my arm at a 45 degree angle. Somehow, my manager wasn’t amused. > [@DarrenS](#): > > My point was that someone who has spent their time learning to do something they enjoy doing should be able to find a place where they can do it an enjoy those working hours, rather than treating them as drudgery that they have to do to pay the bills. Let me know how your ideal society deals with problems like piles of trash, toilets overflowing with shit, and data that needs to be entered into spreadsheets. ---
**Author:** ![DarrenS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@DarrenS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarrenS)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/72 "2010-09-27T23:39:23Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Let me know how your ideal society deals with problems like piles of trash, toilets overflowing with shit, and data that needs to be entered into spreadsheets. Apparently, plenty of people in this thread don’t think it’s unreasonable to do that kind of work. They can have it. And please point out where I said anything about “ideal society”. ---
**Author:** ![Gukumatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@Gukumatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gukumatz)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/73 "2010-09-28T02:44:30Z")
> [@DarrenS](#): > > Apparently, plenty of people in this thread don’t think it’s unreasonable to do that kind of work. They can have it. And please point out where I said anything about “ideal society”. An ideal society would be one where people could pick and choose where they’d like to work. I do hotel receptionist work. (And IT, film or audio tech work when I can get it) I’m damn good at it. I have written records and references that’ll gladly tell you the same. I like going to job in the morning. And I’m in my early twenties. So in about ten-fifteen years, _I’ll_ be able to choose where I work. Even today, I might get lucky (as I did with my new job) but anyone who takes the attitude that “the skilled will always have a job” should try resigning their job before finding a new one, next time. I judge it’ll take about three months before your standards starts to slip. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/74 "2010-09-28T07:19:52Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > > [@FE3O4ENAIL](#): > > > > I was the team leader of one of two groups that was given a box of stuff and had to build something ( a tower? a helicopter? I truely forget). > > > > The presenter took me aside and ordered me to be a nasty boss, disparaging all my peoples ideas, and to do the work myself. You see, the other leader didn’t get those instructions and we were supposed to be supprised when my team did poorly. > > > > Screw them, I just stood mute, despite the glares from the presenter. > > He wanted you to that to illustrate how workers deal with an a-hole boss vs. a effective boss. In defying him, your were an even bigger a-hole. Maybe the coach should have chosen someone who enjoys being an asshole boss, then. There’s a few in every company, and neither need nor benefit in forcing people into roles that will be evidently fake to anybody who’s known them for five minutes. “Kommandant” José Mari trying to get cast as Truppenchief vonMartínez? Absolutely believable, it’s his usual MO. Miguel “Mr. Laid Back”? After a minute of trying to behave like that, we would have been checking his forehead for fever and paging the company doctor. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/75 "2010-09-28T13:03:56Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > It’s quite possible to enjoy your job and your co-workers without liking the painful forced “fun” or teambuilding crap. > > I like going to work. I like my job. I do it well. I like finding processes that will make my job quicker/easier to perform and/or save the company money. And you sound like such an enjoyable person to work alongside as well. For the record, I’ve never even seen, heard, nor been involved in any of that shit you’re talking about. Team building, from my perspective, has always just been … let’s take a little break and recharge and maybe have a few laughs. I feel sorry for your co-workers. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/76 "2010-09-28T14:18:24Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > > [@Sattua](#): > > > > Gee. My company has never done any team-building exercises. But then, we don’t do birthday and holiday celebrations, either. Or performance reviews. Or raises. Or bonuses. > > Would you like fries with that? Worse… a startup that has neither gone bankrupt nor made money in the past several years, with management in a different city than most of the workers. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/77 "2010-09-28T14:41:10Z")
I like my job, too, and I like my coworkers. I do not, however, like stupid team building exercises. Just take all of that money, divide it up, and hand it to me. Does it work out to be only $5? Hey, that’s a free lunch! And it would make me so much happier. ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/78 "2010-09-28T15:23:03Z")
I don’t think a job has to be a laugh riot all the time. But it shouldn’t be someplace you dread going every day. In my experience, it’s not the job’s rating on the “fun meter” that matters so much as the atmosphere and attitude at the place of business. If workers are treated with respect and appreciation, it’s usually a good place to work. If workers are treated like slaves, are exposed to aggression, or are constantly under threat of losing their paycheck, it will be miserable. I had a nice, “cushy” highly skilled job with a literal corner office, and it drove me into crushing depression because my boss was an asshole. I was much happier running a cash register for an hourly wage. They still had to pay me to do it - I could think of a lot of activities that were more fun and hurt my feet less - but it was an acceptable place to go day in and day out, because I was among people who treated each other well. I’d say people are complaining about “team-building” that exhibits disregard of workers as individual people. Activities that offer things most people like (see free food and booze, above), along with flexibility in what they participate in and not expecting them to spend their personal time on it are probably OK with most people. ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849/79 "2010-09-28T23:19:46Z")
Just seen this in the news and had to relate it. And you thought your team building exercises were bad… :eek: > [@](#): > > A MAN is suing his former employer for sexual harassment and breach of contract after he refused to attend an office retreat that involved naked men. > Stephen Eggleston alleged that he read websites that suggested the all-male weekend could involve an activity where naked participants passed a wooden phallus around in a circle and described their sexual experiences to each other, reported ABA Journal. > [snip] > The **‘New Warrior Training Adventure’** is described on its website as “a modern male initiation and self-examination”. > [snip] > Nudity at the retreat “is NOT required” but “the VAST majority of men choose to participate”, as nude participation “is NEVER sexual”, says the website. Address of the news article itself (unlinked because of NSFW photo – rear male nudity for thems that want to know). NOThttp://www.news.com.au/business/business-smarts/lawyer-sues-ex-firm-for-naked-male-retreat/story-e6frfm9r-1225930875532 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/team-building-exercise/554849.md?page=3)