# Teasing the kids about Disney: Please help **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 3, 2007, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275 "2007-08-03T12:49:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/21 "2007-08-03T20:11:07Z")
If you want to be sneaky, you can say “It’s bigger than Disneyland.” No, we’re not **taking** you to Disneyland. We’re taking you somewhere _bigger._🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/22 "2007-08-03T20:23:07Z")
[QUOTE=Fish] If you want to be sneaky, you can say “It’s bigger than Disneyland.” No, we’re not **taking** you to Disneyland. We’re taking you somewhere _bigger._🙂 [/QUOTE] I think this would be too much of a giveaway. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/23 "2007-08-03T20:36:59Z")
Something about mice is good. Maybe just say ‘rodents’ or ‘vermin.’ And tell them it’s a small place (world). ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/24 "2007-08-03T21:04:38Z")
[QUOTE=The Sonoran Lizard King] “One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. “Oh, no,” I said. “Disneyland burned down.” He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.” - Jack Handy. [/QUOTE] Damn, I thought for sure I’d be the first to post this and here I am…eight hours too late. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/25 "2007-08-03T21:49:35Z")
Tell her you’re going to Vegas to double her college fund, that should get her excited. ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/26 "2007-08-03T21:59:52Z")
Tell her that there are 999 grim grinning ghosts on the premises. That’ll give her something to think about. Oh, and the birds sing words, and the flowers croon (in the Tiki-tiki-tiki-tiki-Tiki Room)! Be sure to mention that the President of the United States appears there daily, and he’s never been more articulate. ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2007, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/27 "2007-08-03T22:42:26Z")
[QUOTE=Jonathan Chance] We figure we can drop hints and see if she can figure it out before we touch down in Orlando and the Disney folks pick us up. [/QUOTE] Uh, won’t she hear the word “Orlando” at SOME point at the airport BEFORE you get on the departing plane? The whole gaff will be blown the minute she hears “United Airlines Flight 112 bound for Orlando, Florida, now boarding through Gate 3” or “welcome aboard UA Flight 112 with service to Orlando, Florida.” So you’d better get in the fun while you can. How about something like “We’re going to the second southernmost state in the U.S.”? Get her interested in geography, and reading latitude/longitude lines (in order to figure out that Hawaii is more southern than Florida)? ---
**Author:** ![\_len](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/c0e974/32.png) [@\_len](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_len)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2007, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/28 "2007-08-08T02:14:55Z")
You could mention you’ll be doing some river rafting (Kali River Rapids) and going on an African safari (Kilimanjaro Safaris). Hang-gliding over California. On a _Gran Fiesta_ tour of Mexico. And seeing the wonders of China. Or you could mention that one of the hotels near where you’re staying might be haunted, after being struck by lightning in 1939. Len ---
**Author:** ![TupeloHoney](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@TupeloHoney](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TupeloHoney)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2007, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/29 "2007-08-08T02:29:25Z")
Oh wow! This is so much fun! I love Disney and can’t wait to have children to take there for the first time. Your children are going to have the most wonderful time! I actually just went to Disney World on vacation earlier this month and each visit makes me remember why it is so magical. It’s for children of all ages! Now - for a clue… I like the idea of telling her that she’ll see mice, dwarfs, princesses, and a pirate or two. She’ll get to go under the sea and learn how to fly, take a trip to the jungle, and see a genie pop out of a lamp! Not sure if you’re going to Epcot, but if so make sure you do Turtle Talk with Crush. Your children will love it! Have an amazing vacation!! ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2007, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/30 "2007-08-08T11:18:03Z")
Tell them they’re going to see someone in a sailor suit without any pants. I do have fond memories of taking our kids to Disney, despite the oppressive August heat and the ripoff prices. [This site](http://www.allearsnet.com/) is one of my favorite Disney guide sites. My tip: figure out how much money you’ll need. Take twice as much. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2007, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/31 "2007-08-08T11:37:43Z")
Thanks, guys! We’ll be using some of these… So far the clues are: 1. She’ll need a swimsuit (the hotel has a pool). 2. She’ll need comfortable shoes for walking (there’s a lot of walking, God knows). 3. She’ll need a pen for writing (Character autographs). 4. We’re driving to Cleveland (we fly out of Cleveland). 5. It will be very hot (Florida in August) She hasn’t put it together. The Cleveland thing is throwing her. Heh heh heh. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2007, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/32 "2007-08-08T14:07:17Z")
Tell her, “You’ll have to get a passport.” At Epcot, you can get a souvenir passport, and people from each pavilion around the World Showcase will sign and stamp it for you. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2007, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275/33 "2007-08-08T14:58:46Z")
[QUOTE=Jonathan Chance] She hasn’t put it together. The Cleveland thing is throwing her. Heh heh heh. [/QUOTE] You’re evil. And inspiring. 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teasing-the-kids-about-disney-please-help/414275.md?page=1)