# Technology doesn't work that way - SamuelA's Pit Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 3, 2017, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420 "2017-12-03T00:52:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 63
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1241 "2019-06-27T23:28:33Z")
> [@nelliebly](#): > > I think the whole sex with hookers braggadacio sounds phony, like a sort of incel Walter Mitty. Doesn’t it sound to you like he’s trying > > _way_ too hard? I suggested that upstream. It’s not only the super cute, thin women but also the free pot. If you’re spending $500 a pop, who gives a shit about a free hit? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1242 "2019-06-28T02:00:16Z")
> [@Guest-starring\_Id](#): > > Reassuring to hear - don’t want Dopers having a hard go of it.🙂 Oh, I’m just a cog in a machine–but I realize it. And I’m a \*good cog, \*that did my time to earn my wayinto a soopercool machine. [sub]This is what I get for posting from a cellphone, isn’t it?[/sub] Tripler Putting the ‘mental’ in “governmental” since 1999. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1243 "2019-06-28T02:19:49Z")
> [@raventhief](#): > > I have to wonder if the Super Genius is getting an HIV test, since the post with HIV rates in Kiev may have thrown him for a loop. Aw, do you think I scared him a touch? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1244 "2019-06-28T02:23:58Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > Aw, do you think I scared him a touch? You _touched_ him? :eek: Did you decon/amputate that hand? Dood, seriously, get some Bactine on that hand before you touch another keyboard. Tripler You might have caught a case of the nanobots. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1245 "2019-06-28T02:43:38Z")
😃 Scared some, not with a touch. :vomit: ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1246 "2019-06-28T03:31:19Z")
Aw hell, he’s probably at his FAANG interview, trying to sell the Cobra Commander and Destro on his self-replicating nanobots, asteroid weapons, and the cable car system to the Snake Pit. Even Serpentor is in the back corner of the conference room, rolling his eyes and shaking his head at the thought of this guy. :smack: “The Baronessssss isssss not for sssssssale, **SsssssamuelA**.” Tripler Because knowing is half the battle… ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1247 "2019-07-04T22:59:07Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > I’ll make a wage: **SamuelA** ’s last activity was on 06-24-2019 12:47 AM (MDT). I’ll bet that he’ll avoid us, specifically this thread, and will return to the SDMB ten days from his last activity +/- 12 hours. > > I’m willing to wager a good cup of coffee from your local coffee house (that’s not a Starbucks) that he’ll pop into some other thread to offer “advice.” > > Tripler > Any takers? Almost exactly dead-on! Fucking amazing. It was actually about 10 days and 21 hours by my quick estimation, and he’s baaaaack! Dispensing advice all over the place on logging HVAC activity, car buying, and of course, his perennial favorite topics, special ed and shooting down missiles. Self-replicating nanobots and cryogenically frozen heads in a jar will be along any minute. Apparently even the self-aggrandizing weenies at LesserWrong must have gotten fed up with his tedious pontificating and kicked him out again. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1248 "2019-07-07T19:25:51Z")
Words. Fail. Me. [https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=878349](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=878349) > [@SamuelA](#): > > I had a thought the other day. If you’re an oppressed minority, perpetually subject to discrimination, and you look the same as the people oppressing you, there’s an obvious thing to try. > > Just convert to the dominant culture, and teach your children it’s mannerisms. Marry off your children into the dominant culture’s families. In a generation or 2, nobody will know the difference. > > This is the fundamental “problem” black people face with discrimination, which other persecuted “white” minorities don’t face. There used to be heavy discrimination against Irish and Italian and other white people immigrants, right, but that’s mostly gone now. Not because those people all died or people stopped discriminating, but because nobody can tell “their” children apart from the dominant group, and thus nobody can discriminate. > > Anyways, it occurred to me that probably many “Jewish” families did exactly this. And some of their distance decedents were probably drafted and served as concentration camp guards. > > Is this an accurate model of what happened? [![](https://i.stack.imgur.com/jiFfM.jpg) ](https://i.stack.imgur.com/jiFfM.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1249 "2019-07-07T19:58:24Z")
Fuckin’ Hell. That boy ain’t right. ---
**Author:** ![SamuelA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@SamuelA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SamuelA)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1250 "2019-07-07T20:03:02Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > Almost exactly dead-on! Fucking amazing. It was actually about 10 days and 21 hours by my quick estimation, and he’s baaaaack! Dispensing advice all over the place on logging HVAC activity, car buying, and of course, his perennial favorite topics, special ed and shooting down missiles. Self-replicating nanobots and cryogenically frozen heads in a jar will be along any minute. Apparently even the self-aggrandizing weenies at LesserWrong must have gotten fed up with his tedious pontificating and kicked him out again. Don’t forget racism and anti-semitism. We all should be outraged at this prick! He implied the Jews were responsible for their own holocaust since their distant unavowed descendents 150 years later could have participated in it! He wondered aloud if black people would have light skin if they were never exposed to sun! What a douche! ---
**Author:** ![Emiliana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@Emiliana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emiliana)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1251 "2019-07-07T20:12:36Z")
> [@SamuelA](#): > > Don’t forget racism and anti-semitism. We all should be outraged at this prick! > > He implied the Jews were responsible for their own holocaust since their distant unavowed descendents 150 years later could have participated in it! He wondered aloud if black people would have light skin if they were never exposed to sun! > > What a douche! You got some really weird ideas, toots. I don’t want to subscribe to your newsletter. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1252 "2019-07-07T20:14:43Z")
> [@SamuelA](#): > > Don’t forget racism and anti-semitism. We all should be outraged at this prick! > > He implied the Jews were responsible for their own holocaust since their distant unavowed descendents 150 years later could have participated in it! He wondered aloud if black people would have light skin if they were never exposed to sun! > > What a douche! Stop hit’n yourself. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1253 "2019-07-07T20:17:54Z")
Credit where credit is due - the last sentence is solid. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2019, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1254 "2019-07-07T23:52:50Z")
> [@SamuelA](#): > > Don’t forget racism and anti-semitism. We all should be outraged at this prick! > > He implied the Jews were responsible for their own holocaust since their distant unavowed descendents 150 years later could have participated in it! He wondered aloud if black people would have light skin if they were never exposed to sun! > > What a douche! Well, at least you self report. You might want to do some light reading, on, well, any subject. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2019, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1255 "2019-07-08T00:13:52Z")
So Sammy’s general ignorance, racism, dishonesty, pomposity, and sociopathic total lack of empathy for the learning-disabled have all already been established. Thanks to his most recent activity, we can now add anti-Semitism to his list of admirable qualities. And the fun continues elsewhere, too. When someone asked [whether an AI could create jokes](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=878344), Sammy is in there like a dirty shirt [explaining exactly how it’s done](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21736575&postcount=5). You just need some “generative adversarial networks” … lol! Only these can’t have heuristics, sadly, which he then proceeds to define incorrectly. What’s even sadder for ol’ Sammy is that an actual AI researcher who is also a linguist and works on computational humor came along exactly two posts later with some actual interesting commentary on the work that’s been done in the area. I imagine Sammy will be back shortly to explain the mistakes he’s making and set his research on the right path. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SamuelA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@SamuelA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SamuelA)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2019, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1256 "2019-07-08T00:39:58Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > And the fun continues elsewhere, too. When someone asked [whether an AI could create jokes](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=878344), Sammy is in there like a dirty shirt [explaining exactly how it’s done](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21736575&postcount=5). You just need some “generative adversarial networks” … lol! Only these can’t have heuristics, sadly, which he then proceeds to define incorrectly. What’s even sadder for ol’ Sammy is that an actual AI researcher who is also a linguist and works on computational humor came along exactly two posts later with some actual interesting commentary on the work that’s been done in the area. I imagine Sammy will be back shortly to explain the mistakes he’s making and set his research on the right path. 😃 I know, right! What a moron! He explains like a total dipshit a machine learning based approach, and someone comes along and mentions a method using a symbols based approach, the original way to do AI! What an idiot! Symbols based is the future, machine learning is junk! ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2019, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1257 "2019-07-08T00:42:37Z")
I read the paragraph on heuristics twice and it just doesn’t work. **psychonaut** ’s AI sounds very cool though. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2019, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1258 "2019-07-08T01:22:07Z")
> [@SamuelA](#): > > I know, right! What a moron! He explains like a total dipshit a machine learning based approach, and someone comes along and mentions a method using a symbols based approach, the original way to do AI! What an idiot! Symbols based is the future, machine learning is junk! Your grasp of it is junk ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2019, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1259 "2019-07-08T01:27:00Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Your grasp of it is junk It’s his junk to grasp. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2019, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420/1260 "2019-07-08T03:12:19Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Well, at least you self report. You might want to do some light reading, on, well, any subject. Well, that’s probably his problem right there. All he’s done is light reading–of the wrong sort! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420.md?page=62) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/technology-doesnt-work-that-way-samuelas-pit-thread/803420.md?page=64)