# Teen to Santa: "Gimme what I want or you're dead meat!" **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 17, 2011, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513 "2011-12-17T10:35:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/1 "2011-12-17T10:35:28Z")
My paraphrase. Actually, in addition to threatening to kill Santa, she also threatened to kill his reindeer and feed them to the homeless if she didn’t get what she wants for Christmas: [“Teen writes death threat to Santa.”](http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2011/12/14/19122321.html) > [@](#): > > “This Christmas, I don’t ask for much, so if I don’t get at least two of the things I want, I will literally kill you! Do you understand?! Oh, also, I’ll hunt down your reindeers, cook them and serve their meat to homeless people on Christmas Day,” Mekeeda Austin, 13, wrote in her letter, the Daily Mail reported. “No one wants that, so here’s what I want.” > > The girl lists a BlackBerry, money, a dress, high-top Converse shoes and the real Justin Bieber. > > “Remember, two of these or you die,” she wrote, signing it, “Love from Keedy.” And how did her mum react? by committing to try to get everything on the list, of course. Justin, if you’re reading this, be very afraid. ---
**Author:** ![BeaMyra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/2bfe46/32.png) [@BeaMyra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeaMyra)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/2 "2011-12-17T10:45:02Z")
If she gets Justin Bieber for Christmas, then she’ll get what she deserves for threatening Santa 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/3 "2011-12-17T11:00:34Z")
I wonder how this got into the news though. I don’t mean, why was it deemed newsworthy - what I mean is how does somebody’s letter to santa become known outside the immediate family. In other words, I am not taking this story at face value. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/4 "2011-12-17T11:04:29Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > I wonder how this got into the news though. I don’t mean, why was it deemed newsworthy - what I mean is how does somebody’s letter to santa become known outside the immediate family. In other words, I am not taking this story at face value. Welcome to the Daily Mail. ---
**Author:** ![manila](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@manila](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manila)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/5 "2011-12-17T11:23:08Z")
If she is giving the reindeer meat to the homeless then she has discovered the real meaning of xmas… or something like that. I also second the comment indicating the world of the Daily Mail. ( now I have to go wash my hands for actually typing the name of that rag!) ---
**Author:** ![Foggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foggy/32/1082_2.png) [@Foggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foggy)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/6 "2011-12-17T11:44:11Z")
She’s 13 and still believes in Santa?:eek:😕 ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2011, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/7 "2011-12-17T12:10:30Z")
> [@Foggy](#): > > She’s 13 and still believes in Santa?:eek:😕 That’s why I find the letter “news” silly. That might make a good poll, at what age did you find there is no Santa? I was not quite five.☹ ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/8 "2011-12-19T06:49:53Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > I wonder how this got into the news though. I don’t mean, why was it deemed newsworthy - what I mean is how does somebody’s letter to santa become known outside the immediate family. In other words, I am not taking this story at face value. Is it unheard of in Britain to put them in the real mail? I mean, my local paper always has a large list of letters from Santa reprinted, and I’m pretty sure they get them from the local post office–anything addressed to Santa winds up there. And let’s not even get into Canada and postal code H0H0H0. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/9 "2011-12-19T07:33:52Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > Justin, if you’re reading this, be very afraid. At least she’s not threatening to kill Justin Bieber if she doesn’t get the real Santa. ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/10 "2011-12-19T07:40:10Z")
I can’t be the only one who thinks the letter sounds like a joke? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/11 "2011-12-19T08:14:12Z")
I’m pretty sure a letter like that will get you on the naughty list, so the balance of the universe is preserved. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/12 "2011-12-19T09:51:26Z")
[Tangentially relevant amusing link](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEe55NxFSSU) (NSFW - swearing) ---
**Author:** ![si\_blakely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/13 "2011-12-19T11:54:20Z")
> [@manila](#): > > If she is giving the reindeer meat to the homeless then she has discovered the real meaning of xmas… or something like that. Nope, [you can’t eat reindeer](http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1329594/Lidls-reindeer-meat-Backlash-budget-supermarkets-Christmas-launch.html) either, it destroys the magic of christmas, too. Gotta love the Daily Fail. (see, I avoided typing the name ;)) Si ---
**Author:** ![Walther\_Ego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8dc957/32.png) [@Walther\_Ego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walther_Ego)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/14 "2011-12-19T13:38:00Z")
The reindeer live a freer life and have more space than any tamed animal I know of. I would have thought that any animal rights group would say: don’t eat meat but if you have to, at least eat as much reindeer as possible. ---
**Author:** ![Neidhart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Neidhart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neidhart)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/15 "2011-12-19T13:42:03Z")
I wouldn’t advise eating Rudolph’s nose; the light-emitting chemicals are probably poisonous. ---
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/16 "2011-12-19T14:38:31Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > I can’t be the only one who thinks the letter sounds like a joke? It sounds quite tongue-in-cheek to me too. The tone is light-hearted and funny. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2011, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/17 "2011-12-20T14:47:14Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > It sounds quite tongue-in-cheek to me too. The tone is light-hearted and funny. Yeah, she actually sounds like a pretty funny kid. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2011, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/teen-to-santa-gimme-what-i-want-or-youre-dead-meat/606513/18 "2011-12-20T14:49:30Z")
> [@](#): > > The girl lists a BlackBerry, money, a dress, high-top Converse shoes and the real Justin Bieber. > > “Remember, two of these or you die,” Five bucks and a potato sack. Santa’s safe for another year!