# Telemarketers, where are you hiding?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [April 18, 2017, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703 "2017-04-18T14:22:39Z")
**Posts on this page:** 19
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@2Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2Bits)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/1 "2017-04-18T14:22:39Z")
Anybody here personally know anyone who owns or runs\* one of the companies engaged in telemarketing? If so, please describe the personality of said individual.
Bonus question: Has anybody here actually sat through a telemarketing pitch and purchased the product? If so, were you ultimately satisfied with said purchase?
\*Not particularly interested in the folks (or robots) manning the phones.
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### Author:  [@Silver\_lining](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_lining)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/2 "2017-04-18T14:38:06Z")
> [@2Bits](#):
>
> Anybody here personally know anyone who owns or runs\* one of the companies engaged in telemarketing? If so, please describe the personality of said individual.
>
> Bonus question: Has anybody here actually sat through a telemarketing pitch and purchased the product? If so, were you ultimately satisfied with said purchase?
>
> \*Not particularly interested in the folks (or robots) manning the phones.
You’d be surprised. Telemarketing is more about marketing these days. They target people who have downloaded something, attending something, or said something on social media. Big data as they say.
Its about your need and wants, combined with timing.
People are more prone to listen IF the first 6 seconds of the pitch applies to them.
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### Author:  [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/3 "2017-04-18T14:52:56Z")
[We had a telemarketer post here once…](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=51270)
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### Author:  [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/4 "2017-04-18T15:06:50Z")
I’d like to know why I keep going on cruises and staying at resorts and apparently can’t remember one damn thing about them. They must put roofies in the punch.
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### Author:  [@2Bits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2Bits)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/5 "2017-04-18T15:12:12Z")
> [@Silver\_lining](#):
>
> It’s about your need and wants, combined with timing. People are more prone to listen IF the first 6 seconds of the pitch applies to them.
I say with confidence that the nature of the calls I personally receive has not changed from what I would get 25 years ago and these calls in no way apply to my needs or wants.
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### Author:  [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/6 "2017-04-18T15:33:41Z")
> [@2Bits](#):
>
> I say with confidence that the nature of the calls I personally receive has not changed from what I would get 25 years ago and these calls in no way apply to my needs or wants.
Likewise.
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### Author:  [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/7 "2017-04-18T15:40:25Z")
I once went through the drill to talk to an agent, and I asked him if he wold be interested in a $10,000 whistleblower reward, for turning over his employer for DNC violations. He just laughed and said, No, they pay me very well to do this job.
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### Author:  [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/8 "2017-04-18T15:59:43Z")
> [@2Bits](#):
>
> I say with confidence that the nature of the calls I personally receive has not changed from what I would get 25 years ago and these calls in no way apply to my needs or wants.
Pretty much this.
And frankly, the implausibility and innaccuracy of the approaches is inexcusable. Offering me student loan debt relief? It’s a _stupidly_ easy task to determine if I have any actual student loan debts (I don’t). And it goes on from there… If you’re going to disturb me, at least show some effort to actually target someone whom might, on some implausble day, need or want whatever it is you’re pushing.
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### Author:  [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Channing_Idaho_Banks)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/9 "2017-04-18T16:35:16Z")
No I don’t need a new heater unit. Thank you.
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### Author:  [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/10 "2017-04-18T16:58:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Telemarketers, where are you hiding?
Somebody looking for a target to drop another MOAB?
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### Author:  [@Common\_Tater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Common_Tater)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/11 "2017-04-18T19:01:05Z")
> [@Steve\_MB](#):
>
> Somebody looking for a target to drop another MOAB?
You beat me to it. Would anyone take it badly, I wonder? I mean, aprt from the telemarketers.
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### Author:  [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/12 "2017-04-18T19:56:09Z")
> [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](#):
>
> No I don’t need a new heater unit. Thank you.
I don’t want an extended warranty on my car either.
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### Author:  [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/13 "2017-04-18T20:46:18Z")
> [@Steve\_MB](#):
>
> Somebody looking for a target to drop another MOAB?
From orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.
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### Author:  [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)
#### Post date: [April 18, 2017, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/14 "2017-04-18T21:28:35Z")
Actually, I get relatively few of them, less than one a week (although even that is too many). I wonder if that is because I live in a bilingual city and the callers would have to detect my language and respond it. Perhaps some other Montrealers would confirm my impression.
What I mostly get is: ring; hello; 10 seconds of silence while someone decides what language to speak in; goodbye and hangup.
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### Author:  [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)
#### Post date: [April 19, 2017, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/15 "2017-04-19T19:38:08Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#):
>
> I’d like to know why I keep going on cruises and staying at resorts and apparently can’t remember one damn thing about them. They must put roofies in the punch.
Ah, yes, Planned Memory Obliteration (PMO). If you take a vacation and remember it you are much less likely, on average, to take the same vacation again any time soon. By obliterating your memories of the trip, the vacation companies up the chances of getting more of your money sooner. It’s marketing genius and another example of how space exploration (specifically Men in Black) has spawned useful technology for business use.
Telemarketers, as you can see, really don’t like the tech.
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### Author:  [@Dobbs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dobbs)
#### Post date: [April 19, 2017, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/16 "2017-04-19T19:58:34Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#):
>
> I don’t want an extended warranty on my car either.
The car warranty scammers had been calling me, offering a warranty on a make/model I’ve never owned.
One time I answered and it was a live person. As soon as I heard the word ‘warranty’, I started in with ‘you sumbitches are paying for that transmission, right?’, and from there, it was on. Soon we were screaming and yelling, challenging each other to a gun fight, speaking ill of each other’s mothers, and in general having a good ol’ time. He thought he was playing me, but my goal was to waste as much of his time as I could. I got close to 12 minuets of it, before I told him what I was up to, then he cussed at me some more.
I’m looking forward to the next call. Verizon has reworked the telephone system around here, and I now have simultaneous ring, which means I can now have Nomorobo. I look forward to seeing how well it works.
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### Author:  [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)
#### Post date: [April 19, 2017, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/17 "2017-04-19T21:41:13Z")
> [@Hari\_Seldon](#):
>
> What I mostly get is: ring; hello; 10 seconds of silence while someone decides what language to speak in; goodbye and hangup.
Weirdly, I either get an immediate hangup (what good is telemarketing if you don’t even TRY to talk to me?) or the one I really find odd - a voice comes on and says something like “that extension is not valid. please try your call again later”. I can’t even figure that one out.
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### Author:  [@Wallaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallaby)
#### Post date: [April 19, 2017, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/18 "2017-04-19T22:56:40Z")
I think the OP is using a new, cunning type of telemarketing. After he establishes himself as a cool, with-it, kind of guy who post on interesting web forums ;), he will then offer a ‘Let’s take a hypothetical…’.
And THEN, he’ll deliver the ‘Well, since we are talking about that, I have this opportunity for you…’.
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### Author:  [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)
#### Post date: [April 19, 2017, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/telemarketers-where-are-you-hiding/784703/19 "2017-04-19T23:08:44Z")
> [@Hari\_Seldon](#):
>
> What I mostly get is: ring; hello; 10 seconds of silence while someone decides what language to speak in; goodbye and hangup.
I’ve figured this out, and now simply grunt when answering the phone. It goes dead quickly. 😉