# Tell me a book you've had to hide from your toddlers... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 9, 2007, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507 "2007-02-09T16:23:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![miss\_elizabeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@miss\_elizabeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/miss_elizabeth)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2007, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/41 "2007-02-12T18:16:24Z")
Barney Goes Night Night It was a gift. It was terrible. 'Nuff said. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2007, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/42 "2007-02-12T19:08:18Z")
Snoozers - By Sandra Boynton OK, technically I didn’t hide it. As a matter of fact I read this book to my daughter every single night for probably a year. The good thing is that it only took about 10 minutes to read it. The bad thing is that it was burned into my cranium. But then she learned to read it for herself. ---
**Author:** ![BarnOwl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e95f7d/32.png) [@BarnOwl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BarnOwl)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/43 "2007-02-13T14:49:45Z")
Yesterday, my wife went to Borders, and came back with some books: 1. **Duck Rides a Bike** 2. **Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See** 3. **Puppy and Friends** We’re keeping 1 and 2 here to read to the children on Thursdays when spend the day at our house. We took number 3 to their house yesterday and when we walked in there were the two babies at the door, so happy to see us. As soon as Saxton saw the Puppy book, he put his hands out for it, and immediately sat right down in his tracks to check it out. Throughout our visit we spent lots and lots of time reading that book to the kids - a huge hit. You open to the first spread and see puppies. You feel one’s fur, press the proper button and a puppy barks, then as you proceed through the book, a guinea pig squeaks, a kitten mews and la parrot squawks. Great big smiles of delight, all the live long day. ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/44 "2007-02-13T20:21:03Z")
The five little monkeys, and mama, can never drive far In their rickety, rattletrap wreck of a car. “I’ve had it!” says Mama, “Let’s sell this old heap!” She makes a big sign that says “Car for sale - cheap!” My toddler can recite the next 30 or so verses, and so can I. ---
**Author:** ![BarnOwl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e95f7d/32.png) [@BarnOwl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BarnOwl)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/45 "2007-02-13T20:36:05Z")
[QUOTE=ENugent] The five little monkeys, and mama, can never drive far In their rickety, rattletrap wreck of a car. “I’ve had it!” says Mama, “Let’s sell this old heap!” She makes a big sign that says “Car for sale - cheap!” My toddler can recite the next 30 or so verses, and so can I. [/QUOTE] From what book? 😃😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/46 "2007-02-13T20:46:46Z")
_Five Little Monkeys Wash the Car_ There’s a whole series of them. ---
**Author:** ![Roonwit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/54ee81/32.png) [@Roonwit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roonwit)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/47 "2007-02-13T20:52:38Z")
> [@](#): > > The missus has banished **Fox in Socks**. She HATES reading it, but I really enjoy reading it - so she’d stash it somewhere, then I’d find it - “Hey, Pumpkin! Look what Daddy found!” (Yay!), and SmithWife would get very angry with me. I’d say it’s been “missing” for 6 months now, and I’ve looked all over. ☹ Sounds almost like our house, except Mom didn’t hide _Fox In Socks_, she just said “Why don’t we let _Daddy_ read that one?” \ I always loved to read _Green Eggs and Ham_… but it has to be done [like this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PPxPciXcJvc). 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BarnOwl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e95f7d/32.png) [@BarnOwl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BarnOwl)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/48 "2007-02-13T21:12:45Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] [QUOTE=lorene] Sometimes I send “Fox in Socks” to the Island of Misfit Books (top of our clothes dryer) because it makes me want to cry. > [@](#): > > The missus has banished **Fox in Socks**. She HATES reading it, but I really enjoy reading it - so she’d stash it somewhere, then I’d find it - “Hey, Pumpkin! Look what Daddy found!” (Yay!), and SmithWife would get very angry with me. I’d say it’s been “missing” for 6 months now, and I’ve looked all over. ☹ amazon wants to be your best friend… > **[Amazon.com: Fox in Socks: 9780394800387: Dr. Seuss: Books](https://www.amazon.com/Fox-Socks-Beginner-Books-Seuss/dp/0394800389)** > > Amazon.com: Fox in Socks: 9780394800387: Dr. Seuss: Books …and maybe your wife’s worst enemy. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/49 "2007-02-13T22:09:45Z")
[QUOTE=si\_blakely] It is seared into my brain, along with _Hairy Maclary_ (from Donaldsons Dairy) by Lynley Dodd. Si [/QUOTE] Lynley Dodd rocks, though I’m more of a Slinky Malinki man: Slinky Malinky was blacker than black, a stalking and lurking adventurous cat. He had bright yellow eyes, a warbling wail and a kink at the end of his very long tail. He was cheeky and cheerful, friendly and fun, he’d chase after leaves and he’d roll in the sun. But at night he was wicked and fiendish and sly. Through moonlight and shadow he’d prowl and he’d pry. My niece, who’s 3, thinks Lynley Dodd creates _everything_ with animals in or on it: she’ll see a butter packet depicting a cow and declare authoritatively “By Lynley Dodd”. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/50 "2007-02-13T22:43:41Z")
[QUOTE=Ethilrist] A cow goes moo A sheep goes baa Three singing pigs go “Tra la la…” No, no, you say, that isn’t right Pigs go “Oink” all day and night. I haven’t seen that book in 15 years and it’s still worn a groove in my brain. [/QUOTE] [this book](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MstyFwhLy4) 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Woodhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@Miss\_Woodhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Woodhouse)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/51 "2007-02-13T22:51:40Z")
I once hid _The Very Hungry Catepillar_ because of over reading. I thought seriously about hiding _Knuffle Bunny_ but it’s utterly adorable, too good prose saved it. My children are all big on books, so multiple readings are very common around here. My youngest would sit through a standard (not board) book from the age of nine months on. By one we had progressed to the multiple readings of the same book in the same sitting. She’s a good girl now about only reading a story once each time now thank goodness, so my precarious sanity is saved. PS. Wacky Wednesday is evil. ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/52 "2007-02-13T23:44:25Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] That’s because Sandra Boynton is mind-bogglingly good at writing children’s books. My little one gets _The Belly Button Book_ read to her at least once a day, and I’m fine with that. [/QUOTE] BE BO! I guess I’ve hidden Are You My Mother once or twice. I’m horrible and I tend to suggest short books like Brown Bear, Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, and Wiggle (though there’s one non-scanning line that bugs me) over Cat in the Hat or Tango Makes Three. Those are better daytime books. Disney books get hidden or tossed. I haven’t seen a good one yet. Also some accidentally-purchased Backyardigans books are going in the trash - the prose is pure torture! ---
**Author:** ![Hedda\_Rosa](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hedda_rosa/32/1204_2.png) [@Hedda\_Rosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hedda_Rosa)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2007, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/53 "2007-02-14T04:12:15Z")
_One berry, two berry, pick me a blueberry Hat berry, shoe berry in my canoe berry Under the bridge and over the dam Looking for berries, berries for jam._ Aargh! _Goodnight Moon_ also of course, and _Brown Bear_ and others, but _Jamberry_ is the one kids book that I will still be able to recite on demand when I’m old and peeing myself and can’t even remember my own grandchildren’s names. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2007, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/54 "2007-02-14T04:30:43Z")
Haven’t had a toddler in years, but I had to hide _Curious George Rides a Bike_ which I put on a top shelf. Only a couple of days later…well, maybe a couple of weeks, at any rate **not long enough,** the kid’s other parent said, “Oh, what’s this book doing up here?” In retrospect I should have clued him in. I also used to sort of use movies as a built-in babysitter (bad mommy, bad, bad!) and when I was on deadline for one of my books (a murder mystery) the video of choice was _The Wizard of Oz_ and I was not in the same room but not very far away. Not far enough. I very nearly changed the name of my book to “Really Most Sincerely Dead” and sometimes I wish I’d done it. ---
**Author:** ![BarnOwl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e95f7d/32.png) [@BarnOwl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BarnOwl)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2007, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/55 "2007-02-14T15:58:54Z")
Duh!! I had this brilliant epiphany that all you smart folks are slready doing: Sign the toddler books as you read them to your kids. Brown Bear, Brown Bear seems ideal for the purpose.Look at all the animals you can sign: bear, bird, duck, horse, frog, cat, dog, fish, and sheep. But, you say there’s no word for SHEEP at [http://commtechlab.msu.edu/sites/aslweb/browser.htm](http://commtechlab.msu.edu/sites/aslweb/browser.htm) Click on LAMB and you’ll find it’s a combination of BABY and SHEEP. So, just use the SHEEP sign (which looks like your right hand is sheep shears, running up your left forearm). For beginning signers… If the videos of the signing site above don’t work, you might need to download **(free**) Apple Quicktime at [http://www.apple.com/quicktime/download/win.html](http://www.apple.com/quicktime/download/win.html) You might also want to look at the two My Baby Can Talk DVDs at [http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb\_ss\_gw/102-0538227-5544109?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=My+Baby+Can+Talk&Go.x=4&Go.y=12&Go=Go](http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw/102-0538227-5544109?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=My+Baby+Can+Talk&Go.x=4&Go.y=12&Go=Go) They’re quite good and have enthralled the toddlers of many folks at this website, including my grandkids. ---
**Author:** ![NajaNivea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NajaNivea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NajaNivea)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2007, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/56 "2007-02-15T00:11:44Z")
[QUOTE=lorene] I had to do some editing of the content while I read, too, because I don’t like telling DD that “George was so ashamed that he wished he were dead” or talking about how he and the man with the yellow hat (please, can’t we just call him ‘Fred’? ‘The man with the yellow hat’ is too many syllables!)smoked a pipe after dinner. The other night, my husband was in charge of the bedtime reading. He took a few of the new books we had gotten for Christmas but hadn’t gotten around to reading yet into our daughter’s room. Later on, he mentioned to me that Babar is just a horrible story, and did I know that a hunter kills Babar’s mother on the second page of the book? In his effort to edit while reading, he just said that the hunter “knocked Babar’s mother out.” [/QUOTE] Censorship makes me ☹ I pity your children for living in such a bubble. Stories are the way that we learn to deal with the world. What better way to start a conversation about smoking and the dangers of it, how common it was before because we didn’t know–and how so many people are sick now because of it. Or having a conversation about death, or mothers, or anything. Babar is a wonderful book. I imagine you have good intentions, but what a way to stunt your children’s growth. ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2007, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/57 "2007-02-15T01:12:38Z")
[QUOTE=NajaNivea] I pity your children for living in such a bubble. Stories are the way that we learn to deal with the world. What better way to start a conversation about smoking and the dangers of it, how common it was before because we didn’t know–and how so many people are sick now because of it. Or having a conversation about death, or mothers, or anything. Babar is a wonderful book. I imagine you have good intentions, but what a way to stunt your children’s growth. [/QUOTE] While I agree with you for somewhat older children, we’re talking about toddlers here. They don’t exactly have the capacity for the discussions you’re suggesting. That said, the only book I edit is “Love my Mommy,” and the edit is very slight. Instead of “I love my mommy because she is not afraid of the dark,” I usually say, “I love my mommy because she stays with me in the dark.” I figure there’s no use in _suggesting_ that she should be afraid of the dark. If she develops the fear on her own, the edited version is just as good. But I don’t think my subterfuge will last long, as she’s showing some signs that she’s going to be reading for herself in the not-too-distant future. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2007, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/58 "2007-02-15T03:30:37Z")
Hand hand finger thumb Dum ditty dum ditty dum dum dum ---
**Author:** ![pipperroo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7feea3/32.png) [@pipperroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pipperroo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2007, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507/59 "2007-02-15T03:50:59Z")
We had to hide _How do Dinosaurs Say Goodnight_ for awhile. She was at the stage where she would point to something and say “what that?” There was one page where she would point to the Dinosaur’s nose, and nothing you answered was correct, she kept getting angrier and wouldn’t let you turn the page. We never did figure out what the correct answer was, just hid the book for awhile until she was past that stage. Other books have gotten huge repetition, but fortunately, so far she hasn’t remained fixated on any for too long. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-a-book-youve-had-to-hide-from-your-toddlers/391507.md?page=2)