One thing I couldn’t get used to when I visited The South was that if you were in a restaurant and ordered iced tea, you had to specify “without sugar”, or else you would get something so sweet as to be undrinkable.
Many in the Northeast take pride in being referred to as a Yank, many in the South take would take great offense, no one else cares much one way or the other.
We usually refer to our country (The United States of America) as the United States or just the US, but refer to ourselves as Americans, because United Statesians would sound stupid.
Most of us think of ourselves as American and something else. When outside the US, we will refer to ourselves as Americans. Inside our country, we usually refer to ourselves by our ethnic designation. My students, most of whom are Mexican-Americans, refer to themselves as Mexicans in the US; when they visit Mexico they’re Americans.
We’re a nation founded by immigrants, and are still a nation of immigrants. Over a third of our population is three or fewer generations removed from its family’s country of origin. Over a third of all population growth is from immigration.
Most of us have a number of geographical loyalties of varying strength, i.e. to our country, region, state, city, neighborhood.
We tend to revere our founding fathers to the point that they have become quasi-religious figures.
Sweet Tea should have aproximately 5 tablespoons of granulated sugar per gallon added to freshly brewed tea that is still hot. It is amazing how many restaurants (especially the chains) can not make a decent glass. Johnny L.A., please don’t judge sweet tea based on this. I too have had glasses that tasted like corn syrup with lemon in it. But I could make you a glass that would have you swear off Coke or Pepsi forever.
Additionally, Loaded Dog, you may or not know this but “barbecue” in the U.S. does not mean simply grilled meat - it’s all about the sauce. (i.e. “barbecued” pork is always grilled, but grilled pork is not always “barbecued” - “barbecue” is the style, the grill is the device). I used to date an English chick that got the two mixed up all the time. Otherwise I think the others have done a damn fine job of describing the American Tapestry.
I rarely have a coke (I’ll drink it with fast food), I never have Pepsi if I can help it. I like unsweetened tea or water, or black coffee. I do put sugar in my espresso though. Two teaspoons in a 14 oz. cup of espresso made with freshly-ground French Roasted beans. Mmmmm…
Some might disagree with you about barbecue. To most Americans “barbecue” means cooking meat on a grill with sauce. To others it’s grilling the meat without sauce and serving the meat on the side. Still others say that a proper barbecue (and my favourite when I can get it) is meat that’s been slow-cooked for about 12 hours in a smokey purpose-built barbecue pit with sauce on the side. A fast-food restaurant’s idea of barbecue is shredded meat in sauce. I’ll bet it would be a very interesting trip to travel across the country in search of regional barbecue variations.
The most important things you should be prepared for are the following:
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Most of us do not know where Australia is. You will likely be given the opportunity to explain the difference between Arnold Schwarzenegger and Mel Gibson. You may even be asked if you speak English in Austria–I mean Australia. We do not mean any offense when we ask this. Most Americans don’t know where Idaho is, either.
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You’re a guy, right? Well, it doesn’t really matter. Just feign interest and ask questions here and there, making sure to play up your accent. You will get laid constantly. Americans are suckers for accents.
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Just because we drive goofy-looking cars doesn’t mean we’re rich. Many of us are poor because we just put fat, buzzy, chrome mufflers on our Honda Accords. We do this sort of thing to impress the small subset of the population who also does this sort of thing. It really doesn’t impress anyone else very much. Whatever you do, don’t ask one of these people about their car, unless you want it to be the single topic of discussion for the remainder of your stay.
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Some people will try to take advantage of you by attemting to claim they are more capable or important than they really are. Watch out for this.
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The Australian Embassy in Washington, DC is a wonderful place that has all of your favorite beers in a cute little lounge area, and it’s crawling with gorgeous women. You would be well advised to take me along with you when you go there. You know, to smooth things out. I’m a pretty important guy around here.
TAXI!
I was in America not that long ago, Oakland to be precise, and the major thing that struck me was how nervous people were.
In Canada, I’m regularily finding myself chatting with all manner of people, ranging from children to the elderly, just because I am present. In America, all manner of people were frightened to initiate conversation with me because I don’t look like everyone else (picture Kramer, as a bodybuilder/martial artist, with a slender beatnik beard – kind of like a white Mr. T, now that I think about it). I was casually walking by and told this girl that she had cool hair, and she gave me a look that distinctly said, “What are you up to?” And, until a stranger appeared, she had been perfectly relaxed with her friends.
It was really unnerving. Also, don’t get into hookers’ cars. That freaked everyone out quite a bit, they were surprised I made it out alive. (well, she kicked me out a block later because I only wanted to talk about politics, but apparently it’s a HUGE no-no to get into a stranger’s car. I still haven’t heard the end of it from my Yank friends, who are astounded that I think nothing of it.)
But Canadian women seem to go nuts for an Aussie accent, it sounds like Yank women do, too. Enjoy!
Pah! That was Oakland, fer cryin’ out loud. Not representative of anything except Oakland. Last I heard, they were still calling the cops on their own shadows there.
One of the more amusing things I’ve seen was an Aussie ex-pat working a hotdog cart in downtown San Diego. She was, admittedly one of the cuter girls I’ve seen, but still… She had more custom than she could handle, as all the guys were circling like so many cats at the fish-monger, begging for just a scrap of her attention. It’s not just American women that get all mushy at a cute accent…
You know, it’s always a little pointless to check into a thread after Sofa King, as he always cuts right to the heart of the matter (getting laid). I always picture him clicking “submit reply” and saying “My job here is done.” in a Superhero sort of voice.
Anyway, New York … I live in NYC, and was raised in Buffalo, NY (that’s near Niagara Falls). I’m a complete cheerleader for New York State. Did you know that the Adironack is the largest protected land area in the U.S.? Plus, they make a great chair.
New York City is the same but not the same as one sees in films. Yes, there are parts of the city where the buildings are so high they scrape the sky, but there are many other parts that have mildly sized buildings. It’s also very green. Our parks are beautiful and well-maintained for the most part, and many businesses cultivate public green areas outside of their property as a service to the community. I do some business in Florence, Italy, and I once mentioned that I found it a little depressing to spend so much time downtown because there aren’t any trees. My Italian co-workers thought I was crazy – surely a New Yorker had never even seen a tree!
Not every New Yorker has a Noo Yawk accent, mostly because so many people here are from someplace else … other parts of the U.S. or the world.
The rest of New York State is not at all like New York City, but also worthwhile to visit.
It really is possible to have a honeymoon in Niagara Falls and get a hotel room with a heart-shaped vibrating bed and a hot tub shaped like a champagne glass.
Yank/Yankee – I don’t know any American who would call himself a Yank. Especially around here, it’s mostly associated with the New York Yankees (baseball team).
The U.S. in general:
Nostalgia – I don’t know how much this happens in other countries, but my personal theory on why Americans love nostalgia is because of the vast differences from one region of the country to another. When Americans meet new people, there is often little personal experience in common, yet pop culture nostalgia brings Americans together – hence all the talk about the Brady Bunch, Schoolhouse Rock, the Hamburgler, Star Wars, etc. This is sometimes dismissed as an American preoccupation with television and thus mindless, but I really think it speaks to a deeper desire to find a commonality with other Americans.
We know McDonald’s is junk food. Yes, we eat it anyway, but we’re aware of it.
Americans Abroad: Yes, we can be loud and obnoxious, and often ask amazingly stupid questions about everything we see. But there is a genuine desire to know the answer. How are we supposed to know if everyone has a pet koala if we don’t ask? We’re also not particularly bothered when the answer is given along with the opinion that it was a stupid question. For the most part, we would rather ask a stupid question than sit around being stupid in silence.
My current favorite topic of debate about American culture: whether or not large chain stores are evil. We like things to be cheap, easy to find, and open 24 hours, but there is a popular lament about how the growing chain stores have driven out small Mom and Pop businesses, which we griped about anyway before we had chain stores. In some ways, we are a nation of malcontents.
And most importantly, if you come to NYC, the NYC Dopers provide a fabulous Dopefest which often includes dancing on bars. This is probably really all you need to know.
I can sum up America in one word—WalMart.
Nym pegged the bit about heritage. Americans who have never set foot in Europe, do not speak a word of Irish, have no known family there, and whose only legitimate tie to the home country is a decent recipe for shortbread (if that) wear green and drink themselves silly in celebration of their heritage.
There’s a whole Protestant ethic thing going on. Regardless of an individual’s religion, America has a very Protestant feel and attitude.
The thing to remember about America is that it’s very proud of its Puritain roots. VERY proud. Sometimes I have to double check which century I’m in. But as for my beautiful Los Angeles, I can enlighten you about a few things …
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Southern California does not have weather. It rains occasionally, causing traffic to immediately halt for thirty minutes for each tenth of an inch, but overall, yeah, no weather at all. Most Southern Californians, unless they’re transplants, have no idea how to drive in the rain or shovel a walk.
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In case you have seen Rush Hour 2, let me assure you that there is NOWHERE you can just pull up and park in front of the doors of a skyscraper, especially the tallest one in our skyline. Well, I suppose you technically could, but not if you wanted your car to be there when you got back. It’s all red-curbed.
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Smoking indoors is illegal. Being a non-smoker gets you funny looks.
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Don’t EVER get into a stranger’s car, as has been noted before. And don’t flip off the psycho drivers, either. You never know who’s packing heat.
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Australian accents are AMAZINGLY sexy.
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Don’t expect to take public transportation anywhere in LA or Orange counties. While it’s a fascinating chance to study the substrata of the local wildlife, it’s also faster to walk. Backwards. With your ankles tied together.
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Some graffiti artists are pretty talented. It’s worth taking the train to see some of the work on the LA Trickle. (No, no matter what the map says, it’s not a river)
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Avoid Glendale. No really, just go right around it. Nothing to see there. Move along.
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Oh yes, and there are practically no WalMarts in the LA area. This is a good thing.
A couple of posters have pointed out to me that a significant number of Americans may find this term mildly (or even significantly) offensive -though luckily none has taken personal offence (there’s that wacky Aussie spelling again). I am sufficiently aware of US history to understand why this may be so, and to have hesitated before using it. However, I decided to use it after seeing several American Dopers use it themselves in other threads. But “Yank” is the universal Aussie term for all Americans, and in true Australian spirit, I used it anyway -just to stir the pot. 
Of course, it gets worse:
A (now slightly old fashioned but still used) Australian slang term for an American is “Seppo”. This comes from our occasional habit of using Cockney-style rhyming slang. “Yank” becomes “septic tank”, which is a large tank in the backyard of rural houses (not connected to a sewer system) designed to hold you-know-what. Our habit of shortening things reduced the term to “Septic”, and then further to “Seppo”. With this in mind, if we call you:
An American - We dislike / don’t have an opinion about you.
A Yank - You might be OK.
A Septic Tank - We like you.
A Septic - You’re a really good bloke (for a Septic).
A Seppo - You’re a top bloke.
A Seppo Bastard - You’re IN!
[sub]If we call you any of these “yank-based” terms in the knowledge that you are a Southerner, you can consider yourself advanced to the next category.[/sub]
In a nutshell, if we equate you to a tank full of shit, please don’t be offended.
I can’t believe we forgot to mention this but here, when you flush the toilet, the water really does to counter clockwise. Or sink, or bathtub or whatever large water draining device happens to be handy. cool huh?
I have to call you on this one. Here’s Cecil’s take on the matter. This isn’t to say I necessarily want to disagree with you on this - it would be cool if it were true. I’d always taken it as gospel, but after several inconclusive trips to the Northern Hemisphere (it was about the first thing I did when I got to my hotel), and reading Cecil’s column, I was forced to admit defeat.
Still, it makes a cracking good sub-plot for a Simpsons episode.
Yeah, that reminds me. Does the Australian Prime Minister float around naked in an innertube with a beer in his hand? And do you use The Boot to punish offenders? If so, I’ve GOTTA come visit Australia.
I call it “Los Hideous”. I can’t stand it here. Too much concrete, too much traffic, too many people (and no, you generally can’t just strike up a conversation), not enough weather. I like rain! And wind! I’ve hated the weather here ever since I was a little kid in San Diego. I lived in the desert and it was hot, but at least there was wind.
People who said Australian accents are sexy are right. Americans tend to like Australian and European accents. I do a passable Aussie accent (for a Yank, and after a couple beers) and I’ve thought about “using” it. Damn my honesty! I can’t do it! People in Los Hideous aren’t very approachable. It’s as if any stranger who tries to strike up a conversation is A) trying to have sex with you (this is for strange men approaching women), or B) trying to scam you. It’s not like New Orleans where people are friendlier. I think Southerners are more friendly in general. There are some exceptions. You can talk to people if it’s clear you’re not a threat – like if you look lost or have been hanging out long enough that you’ve already been noticed. If a stranger hears you talk she or he may talk to you because you’re Australian. People are more approachable outside of the big cities.
Don’t get into a stranger’s car. My old copy of Let’s Go: California said, “Hitchhiking is tantamount to suicide.” People are also warned against picking up hitchhikers. So the people likely to stop for you may be the ones you’re being warned about.
Americans are very proud. This manifests itself as “the Ugly American” when we’re abroad, but we’re really okay when you get to know us. Most Americans are very nice and will go out of their way to help.
I’ve never been to Oz, but I think there is a kinship between Australia and the U.S. We share a common “mother country”. Yes, I know Americans come from all over the world, but we were established by England. We were both colonies. We both like to have fun. I think we’ve lost some of our “fun-lovingness” and Australians seem to have more fun than we do, but we still like to play up a good sweat. We have surfing, jet-skiing, boating, swimming, water-skiing, snow skiing, horse riding, rock climbing, white water rafting – all kinds of fun stuff to do that are familiar to an Australian.
On a whole we drink lots of beer, but our mass-market beer is a bit disappointing. (Why is American beer like people making love in a canoe? It’s fucking close to water.) But some of the micro-brews and regional brands are quite good. You can find Fosters almost everywhere, but it’s been a long time since I’ve seen KB.
Bring your own Vegemite. It’s hard to find in stores here. You’ll have to go to an English store. (There’s the shop next door to Ye Olde King’s Head in Santa Monica.) Most Americans don’t like Vegemite if they’ve tried it. People look at me with disgust when I eat it at work.
Fast food places do not serve vinegar with their french fries.
Taco Bell is not Mexican food. Neither is Del Taco, but it’s much better than Taco Bell. If you want Mexican food stay away from chains. Menudo is good if you don’t think about what it’s made of (tripe, hominy, stock – it’s the tripe that throws off most people). Weekend mornings are the best for Menudo.
Americans seem to eat “ethnic” foods: Mexican, Chinese, Thai, Japanese, Italian… American food is often fried: Fried chicken, chicken fried steak, french fries… Oyster “po’ boys” are good in New Orleans, as are other po’ boys. If you get down that way, try a muffeletta sandwich. The Pacific Northwest has good salmon and crab. People like Alaskan king crab, but I prefer dungeness crab. The northeast is famous for its lobster. I like the kind my mon used to bring up from her Mexican vacations. No claws, just a nice juicy tail. I was amazed by the number of Pancake House restaurants they have in the South. Carl’s Jr. (Hardee’s in the South) have the best fast-food burgers. Burger King are also good. In’n’Out burgers are preferred by many, but they aren’t as widespread as the other two. Jack-in-the-Box tacos are rather disgusting, but in a good way. Good jalapeno poopers too. McDonald’s is a joke, but edible and cheap.
Okay, I’m done writing for now.
You guys don’t have those things??? :eek:
Actually, the thought of Little Johnny Howard naked anywhere is a little nauseating (think George from Seinfeld -that’s our PM, 'cept not nearly as handsome or charismatic).
Well [part 1 of colorful backwoods expression] and call me [part 2 of colorful backwoods expression]. It does run ccw here, each and everytime I noticed. But that must be because our water tubes point the water in in that direction. Sadly when I went to Sydney/Brisbane in, oh, 97 or so I was too busy to check.
p.s. for all us Americans I can tell you that each and every one of those cute Australian girlies I met found my accent (standard American English) absolutely sexy and they all wanted to jump me so it works both ways! Sadly there are only about 9 million Aussie chicks for us 145 million American guys.
Oh, and you might like this TheLoadedDog but we have wild wallabys too. Sometime back somebody brought some over and released them into the Koolaus and now they live there. And luckily them seem to cooexist quite well with the native habitat.