# Tell me, tell me, Alan Keyes... what, exactly, is the "slaveholder's position"? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 10, 2004, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247 "2004-08-10T19:23:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/41 "2004-08-13T05:03:06Z")
> [@SPOOFE](#): > > But do we still have the right to mock a politician for pulling a stupid rhetorical buttfuck? Oh, please oh please, let us still have THAT right! Although I don’t agree with your judgement of it, you are still good to go! 🆒 for now… ---
**Author:** ![Gamaliel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b487fb/32.png) [@Gamaliel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gamaliel)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/42 "2004-08-13T05:09:32Z")
> [@Muad'Dib](#): > > There is a difference in that Hillary went “shopping” for a state to run in. Keyes was asked by the constituents of Illinois to run. :eek: 😃😛 :rolleyes: :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/43 "2004-08-13T05:24:41Z")
> [@Gamaliel](#): > > :eek: 😃😛 :rolleyes: :smack: 😕 :dubious: :rolleyes: 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/44 "2004-08-13T06:27:30Z")
> [@](#): > > There is a difference in that Hillary went “shopping” for a state to run in. Keyes was asked by the constituents of Illinois to run. Actually, I’ll bet it was the Republican Party of Illinois who asked him to run, not some vague group of “constituents,” which IMO makes him little more than a hired gun running wherever the Party needs him. I have a Great Debate about this very subject [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=271108), if anyone is interested. ---
**Author:** ![threeorange](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@threeorange](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threeorange)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/45 "2004-08-13T13:45:09Z")
> [@NDP](#): > > In any case, even though I realize Illinois has a sizeable contingent of rabid right-wing religious nuts… No we don’t. They exist, and they’re very vocal, but, compared to other states, there aren’t that many of them here; hence my previous post in this thread. I think the assumption that there are comes from coastal prejudices about the “flyover states”. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/46 "2004-08-13T14:03:14Z")
> [@Muad'Dib](#): > > There is a difference in that Hillary went “shopping” for a state to run in. Keyes was asked by the constituents of Illinois to run. Oh yeah, the entire nation was enthralled by the vision of the mass rallies across Illinois begging the state party to draft this man of extraordinary vision and leadership. It led the political news every night for months. The \*\*constituents \*\* didn’t ask him, schmuck. A small coterie of state party insiders, not including the alibi’ing Hastert, did that after nobody else in the entire state could be talked or bribed into it. Or did “the constituents” ask Mike Ditka first? Thanks for the laugh. Keep it up. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/47 "2004-08-13T14:33:00Z")
I do understand your point Maud Dib (slaves = not human, fetus = not human), but I really don’t see much of a difference between slavery and forcing a woman to carry a child to term and go through labor. I’m not required to sacrifice my time and effort to keep other people alive, why should I be required to do it for a fetus? If I am the only bone marrow match for my child, there is no legal requirement to make me donate, I’m not required to give up a kidney for my sister. I’m not even required to pay taxes to a national health care system that would help keep people alive (unless you count the inadquate Medicare/Medicaid) - that would be too great a burden on me. Pro-life will make a lot more sense to me when we have a national obligitory bone marrow registry and national health care. (Daniel, does Keyes have any supporters? I thought even the right thought he was a nutcase). ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/48 "2004-08-13T14:50:00Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > (Daniel, does Keyes have any supporters? I thought even the right thought he was a nutcase). Near as I can tell, **Muad’Dib** is one; earlier this week, I drove behind a van with a “Keyes for President 1996” bumpersticker, here in NC. There’s nobody so nutty that he’s got no supporters. As for abortion=slavery, I do agree: free the fetuses now! If they want back inot the womb, they’re welcome to go back into the womb; but it’s disgraceful to force them to remain there. Oh, wait. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/49 "2004-08-13T18:04:46Z")
> [@threeorange](#): > > No we don’t. They exist, and they’re very vocal, but, compared to other states, there aren’t that many of them here; hence my previous post in this thread. I think the assumption that there are comes from coastal prejudices about the “flyover states”. I’m sorry if I came across as insulting (especially considering I live in an area that has a similarly unfairly earned reputation with outsiders). Anyway, getting back on topic, Keyes will certainly make this race more interesting but, with his extreme views, he’s going to get stomped. ---
**Author:** ![threeorange](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@threeorange](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threeorange)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/50 "2004-08-13T18:56:07Z")
> [@NDP](#): > > I’m sorry if I came across as insulting (especially considering I live in an area that has a similarly unfairly earned reputation with outsiders). > > Anyway, getting back on topic, Keyes will certainly make this race more interesting but, with his extreme views, he’s going to get stomped. No problem. Re-reading my post, I see that I sounded more offended than I actually was. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2004, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/51 "2004-08-13T20:23:38Z")
> [@SPOOFE](#): > > But do we still have the right to mock a politician for pulling a stupid rhetorical buttfuck? Oh, please oh please, let us still have THAT right! You still have the right, at least until the Super Duper Patriot Act gets passed. ---
**Author:** ![Chairman\_Pow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/838e76/32.png) [@Chairman\_Pow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chairman_Pow)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2004, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247/52 "2004-08-14T04:42:03Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > Got it. So, you feel that those near suicide should just be allowed to have their choice, right? > > Right to die and all that, correct? > > -Joe Perhaps that joke wasn’t as clear as I expected it would be and the argument you’re proposing is off-topic for this thread, so I’ll let it go. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-tell-me-alan-keyes-what-exactly-is-the-slaveholders-position/259247.md?page=2)