# Tell me, Texmam, are you in show business? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 21, 2010, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010 "2010-06-21T18:13:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/81 "2010-06-23T21:09:13Z")
Whew! That was lucky! Damnear lost a $300 hand cart! ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/82 "2010-06-23T21:13:42Z")
And now I would like to read a few passages from the books of Matthew, Mark, Luke and Duck! ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/83 "2010-06-23T23:01:17Z")
Wait, what’s the “Santa Maria” joke then? Oh, and I’ve got this urgent telegram from Rock Ridge that arrived last week. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/84 "2010-06-23T23:02:46Z")
Taggert: Dang, that was lucky. Doggone near lost a four hundred dollar handcar. ---
**Author:** ![goodie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@goodie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/goodie)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/85 "2010-06-23T23:22:29Z")
Bart: Well, Jim, since you are my guest and I am your host, what’s your pleasure? What do you like to do? Jim: Oh, I don’t know. Play chess… screw… Bart: [quickly] Well, let’s play chess. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/86 "2010-06-23T23:24:24Z")
> [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](#): > > Wait, what’s the “Santa Maria” joke then? Reference to Latin jazz musician [Mongo Santamaria](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mongo_Santamaria). Notable, but possibly slightly NSFW album cover: [noparse][http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00004U2GO.jpg[/noparse]](http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00004U2GO.jpg%5B/noparse%5D) ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/87 "2010-06-24T01:28:22Z")
Well raise my rent! I thought all the jokes that sailed over my head as a kid were now within my grasp - turns out I was wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/88 "2010-06-24T01:41:41Z")
> [@goodie](#): > > Bart: Well, Jim, since you are my guest and I am your host, what’s your pleasure? What do you like to do? > Jim: Oh, I don’t know. Play chess… screw… > Bart: [quickly] Well, let’s play chess. Which is ironic as the actor playing Bart (Cleavon Little) is rumored to have been gay. (I think. My Google-fu is weak.) ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/89 "2010-06-24T03:25:19Z")
> [@](#): > > Which is ironic as the actor playing Bart (Cleavon Little) is rumored to have been gay. I hadn’t heard that and I can’t seem to find anything online about him having been gay. Maybe it’s just people who got confused about him playing a flamboyent homosexual in _Once Bitten_. ---
**Author:** ![Qwakkeddup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/90ced4/32.png) [@Qwakkeddup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qwakkeddup)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/90 "2010-06-24T13:40:32Z")
Well I done broke out my dvd last night and watched it. So I’ll give a Laural and Hardy handshake to **tdn** for this thread. Do any of you remember seeing Mongo go diving for Spanish balloons in an old well? Took me until the vhs tape to prove it existed to my sister. Then of course I had forgotten the coin-op quick draw sheriff. I think I’ll dig out Spaceballs tonight. Oh, shit, there goes the planet. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/91 "2010-06-24T13:54:34Z")
> [@Qwakkeddup](#): > > Do any of you remember seeing Mongo go diving for Spanish balloons in an old well? More air: 25 cents ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/92 "2010-06-24T13:59:50Z")
Piss on you! I’m workin’ for MEL BROOKS! ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/93 "2010-06-24T14:09:07Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > More air: 25 cents I dimly remember this. Is there an uber directors cut bluray edition? ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/94 "2010-06-24T14:17:14Z")
> [@Qwakkeddup](#): > > I think I’ll dig out Spaceballs tonight. Ludicrous Speed! ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/95 "2010-06-24T14:20:18Z")
> [@Unintentionally\_Blank](#): > > I dimly remember this. Is there an uber directors cut bluray edition? As I recall in the original release there were several attempts to kill/subdue Mongo by Sherriff Bart, but they were subsequently cut and only the “Telegram for Mongo” scene remains in current versions. I’m betting that’s the difference. I’ll bet that’s a very old VHS tape. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/96 "2010-06-24T14:22:35Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > Ludicrous Speed! Don’t make me break out spaceballs: the placemat! ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/97 "2010-06-24T14:27:12Z")
Willkommen. Bienvenue. Welcome. C’mon in. ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/98 "2010-06-24T15:01:50Z")
'Scuse me while I whip this out. ---
**Author:** ![Shark\_Sandwich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Shark\_Sandwich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shark_Sandwich)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/99 "2010-06-24T15:13:50Z")
> [@Evil\_Captor](#): > > As I recall in the original release there were several attempts to kill/subdue Mongo by Sherriff Bart, but they were subsequently cut and only the “Telegram for Mongo” scene remains in current versions. I’m betting that’s the difference. I’ll bet that’s a very old VHS tape. The only time I’ve seen this footage was when it was broadcast on regular TV. My VHS copy doesn’t have it, so I always assumed it was extra footage that was added to compensate to how regular TV completely hacks the movie to pieces. Coincidentally, it was on AMC last night 2am EST, and it’s still hacked all up to the point it’s almost unwatchable. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010/100 "2010-06-24T15:16:35Z")
> [@Shark\_Sandwich](#): > > The only time I’ve seen this footage was when it was broadcast on regular TV. Yeah, that’s one of the major differences between the TV edited version and the theatrical version. Well, that and the complete lack of humor. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-texmam-are-you-in-show-business/544010.md?page=6)