# tell me that I wasn't completely out of line **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 9, 2004, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807 "2004-11-09T08:07:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![START](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@START](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/START)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/1 "2004-11-09T08:07:00Z")
I know that we all acted like a bunch of 2 year olds today but hey, he STARTed it. I will describe the incident that took place earlier today in as much detail as possible and then add that looking back at it, things could have been handled differently but exactly how I don’t know. We were very immature We were in my friend “Brian’s” car after school with another guy I will call “Jeff” and his Jeff’s cousin that I will call “Amy”. I know “Jeff” because my mother and his mother are friends and my friend knows “Jeff” because he likes “Amy”. Jeff is a big guy and he is very intimidating, loves classic rock and so do Brian and I but we are not as into it as “Jeff”. Apparently anything made after Jeff turned 2 years old is too new for him. Jeff he had this CD with classic rock on it and he says “play this” and Brian plays it and we were driving around with the music up real loud. Brian is more into hardcore metal than anything else and when a “KISS” song ended, Brian says now it’s time for something hardcore and puts in some Hardcore Metal. Jeff begins weirding out like “What the hell is this gay crap…turn it off” Jeff kept demanding that the music be turned off and that it was too loud although we listened to his classic rock mix at the same volume. Jeff was really getting agitated and he wasn’t joking around and his cousin keeps repeating “it’s not your car”. Jeff was like “but I’m in it” and he ejects the disc and Brian puts it back in and this repeats until Jeff throws it out the window. Brian was horrified because the CD I guess wasn’t from a mainstream band and was already out of print and he hadn’t made any copies yet. Amy kept promising that she would get Brian a new CD and Brian was trying to tell her that the CD probably couldn’t even be bought anymore. Amy wanted us to go back and get the disc because Brian was really upset, like “wanting to cry” type of upset. He didn’t want to turn back because in his words the CD was already “f-cked up”. Brian pulls the car over and tells Jeff to get out and Jeff is all “Make me” and because Brian knows he is no match for Jeff he continues driving. Jeff was telling Brian that he is not allowed to play “gay ass heavy metal shit” (exact words) when he is in the car and Brian was basically saying “f-ck you”. Imagine this whole time the tension is high and one girl is in the back seat trying to keep the peace. Her cousin is bragging about throwing the CD out and saying that if it was the last one that he did the world a favor by getting rid of it. I was feeling bad for Brian so when I noticed that Jeff’s CD player was right next to me I threw it out of the window. Brian cheers, Amy says we were even and Jeff is ready to kill me. Jeff opens the glove compartment and takes out everything and asked if it was important and of course it was and out of the window it goes. I took Jeff’s back pack which was on the back seat and opened it and threw most of the contents out of the window. The obvious question is was anybody behind us and the answer is honestly I do not know because I was not thinking at all I was just acting. Jeff wanted Brian to turn around and get the stuff but Brian just pulled over and let him out and Amy wanted to go with him so he wouldn’t be alone but Jeff refused. Now this is the part that made me realize a lot sooner that I was a part of the problem and not a solution as my father would say. We drove back around to see Jeff crossing the street trying to pick up his stuff that was all over the road and Amy convinced him to get back in the car and convinced Brian to let him get back in. When he got back in the car believe it or not he was crying, I kid you not he was crying. I was expecting him to try to hit me but he didn’t say anything, just sat next to me on the backseat. He didn’t even finish the trip and asks to be let out a few minutes later and after we dropped off Amy. Brian was congratulating me on what I did except that I felt like a jerk and he kept bringing it up. I was glad to get home today except that my mother knew about everything that happened and asked why I wasn’t being “Christ-like” towards a boy that apparently doesn’t really have any friends. It was like being congratulated by Brian was like being stabbed and then I came in the house and my mom finished me off. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/2 "2004-11-09T08:14:26Z")
Nope, you all acted like perfectly rational, level-headed adults. ---
**Author:** ![START](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@START](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/START)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 8:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/3 "2004-11-09T08:32:16Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > Nope, you all acted like perfectly rational, level-headed adults. Yep I thought so. NOT ---
**Author:** ![Gamaliel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b487fb/32.png) [@Gamaliel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gamaliel)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/4 "2004-11-09T08:58:58Z")
I’m surprised nothing was set on fire. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 9:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/5 "2004-11-09T09:04:17Z")
> [@Gamaliel](#): > > I’m surprised nothing was set on fire. That would’ve been immature! I’m teasing you, START. If I had a nickel for every time I was involved in a situation at least this stupid in high school, well, I’d have an assload of nickels. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/6 "2004-11-09T09:23:51Z")
How did your mom know anything about it? ---
**Author:** ![Mike\_in\_HK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@Mike\_in\_HK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mike_in_HK)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/7 "2004-11-09T09:51:27Z")
The only thing out of line was that you didn’t finish him off. Why didnt you laugh and ridicule him for crying like a big girl??? For good measure you should have sucked your index finger then stuck it in his ear. ---
**Author:** ![bienville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@bienville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bienville)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/8 "2004-11-09T09:53:49Z")
> [@Mike in HK](#): > > Why didnt you laugh and ridicule him for crying like a big girl??? Big girls don’t cry-y-y. ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/9 "2004-11-09T13:22:44Z")
:: crosses START and friends off list of people to invite on road trip :: ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/10 "2004-11-09T14:27:52Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > How did your mom know anything about it? Mothers _always_ know! ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/11 "2004-11-09T15:33:36Z")
That was **LITTERING**! Shame on you. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/12 "2004-11-09T15:51:13Z")
Crikey, you sure your friends aren’t really called Rick, Vyvyan, Neil, and Mike? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/13 "2004-11-09T16:01:04Z")
START, I know exactly how you feel. It must have been very satisfying to chuck that CD player out the window. But escalation is an ugly game. It sucks when someone wrongs you, but keeping the moral high ground is better in the long term. It leaves him in a weaker position in future conflicts. If you’re into keeping score, that is. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/14 "2004-11-09T16:17:21Z")
We have a rule in our car: “Driver comfort.” Whoever is driving gets the AC set at the level they prefer and gets the choice of the music to listen to. Cuts out a lot of arguments, I can tell you. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/15 "2004-11-09T16:38:22Z")
Well thank GOD Brian doesn’t keep a gun in the glove compartment. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/16 "2004-11-09T16:46:29Z")
> [@START](#): > > my mother knew about everything that happened and asked why I wasn’t being “Christ-like” towards a boy that apparently doesn’t really have any friends. Gee, I bet I can guess why he doesn’t have any friends… :dubious: Yes, you were stupid. Jeff was cruel and stupid. I don’t think there is a winner in this round. But (not to sound too mom-like) it’s not relevant who STARTed it. You finish it. Be the better man and apologize to Jeff, then suggest to him that the two of you track down another copy of Brian’s CD. Oh, and for next time? What \*\*ivylass \*\* said. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/17 "2004-11-09T17:48:20Z")
> [@Ms Boods](#): > > Crikey, you sure your friends aren’t really called Rick, Vyvyan, Neil, and Mike? 😃 Let’s throw Rik’s CD player out the window, that’ll be good for a laugh. ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/18 "2004-11-09T17:55:42Z")
> [@Hampshire](#): > > Well thank GOD Brian doesn’t keep a gun in the glove compartment. Yeah, anybody could pick that up off the side of the road! ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/19 "2004-11-09T17:56:22Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > We have a rule in our car: “Driver comfort.” > > Whoever is driving gets the AC set at the level they prefer and gets the choice of the music to listen to. > > Cuts out a lot of arguments, I can tell you. Amen, sister! I like to call it “Driver’s Choice”. 😃 (And God bless those naive souls who like to think there should be a consensus; in my mind, it’s the driver who has the power to drive off a bridge and kill everyone in the car, so it’s the driver who should be happy, especially in terms of music! And I am fully committed to this practice this despite the fact that my Air-Supply-lovin’ husband does 90% of the driving for us!) ---
**Author:** ![Bill\_H](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Bill\_H](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_H)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2004, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807/20 "2004-11-09T20:03:01Z")
It’s hard to pick a side without knowing what the metal cd was. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-me-that-i-wasnt-completely-out-of-line/273807.md?page=2)