# Tell us about your Really Kinky Fantasies **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 15, 2000, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443 "2000-06-15T04:40:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Elthia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e274bd/32.png) [@Elthia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elthia)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/21 "2000-06-15T16:19:40Z")
I feel so … tame. In an odd way. I’ve DONE all the things I could possibly think of as kinky fantasies, including extra people and BDSM both ways. I hate being tied up. I get this fight reaction, where I’m more likely to kick him hard enough in the chest to cause heart failure than to sit back and enjoy myself. I don’t mind being a ‘top’, but it’s not as much of a turn on as it is sometimes-fun. Most of my real Fantasies read like romance novels 😕 Y’know, roomful of flowers, silk sheets, man who smells incredibly good and is irresistably sexy - and while confident and strong (he can pick me up without wincing, walk around with me in his arms), still is gentle and sweet at heart… the kind who COULD protect me - but knows he wouldn’t need to, so won’t unless I ask. Sometimes they involve food, but usually EATING it BEFORE sex, not during or on each other. REal food, good food - like really good, fresh steaks, seasoned properly and cooked properly (NO hockey pucks, thanks). Food is a very sensual thing to me, a good meal is a great way to get me started. Women get involved too sometimes, but it’s the same type of woman. LOL I like my women the same way I like my men - well built, strong, sensitive, and able to kick ass but not likely to unless it’s -necessary-. And pretty. I like em pretty (both genders). Well, that and the dnd fantasies, but… um… those are embarrassing _sheepish grin_ (I can’t help it. I’m in love with Drizzt _wince_ don’t beat me, I have fantasies about wandering the woods with an elven ranger, or … well… lol anything with elves eep. ) -Elthia ---
**Author:** ![Elthia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e274bd/32.png) [@Elthia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elthia)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/22 "2000-06-15T16:19:49Z")
I feel so … tame. In an odd way. I’ve DONE all the things I could possibly think of as kinky fantasies, including extra people and BDSM both ways. I hate being tied up. I get this fight reaction, where I’m more likely to kick him hard enough in the chest to cause heart failure than to sit back and enjoy myself. I don’t mind being a ‘top’, but it’s not as much of a turn on as it is sometimes-fun. Most of my real Fantasies read like romance novels 😕 Y’know, roomful of flowers, silk sheets, man who smells incredibly good and is irresistably sexy - and while confident and strong (he can pick me up without wincing, walk around with me in his arms), still is gentle and sweet at heart… the kind who COULD protect me - but knows he wouldn’t need to, so won’t unless I ask. Sometimes they involve food, but usually EATING it BEFORE sex, not during or on each other. REal food, good food - like really good, fresh steaks, seasoned properly and cooked properly (NO hockey pucks, thanks). Food is a very sensual thing to me, a good meal is a great way to get me started. Women get involved too sometimes, but it’s the same type of woman. LOL I like my women the same way I like my men - well built, strong, sensitive, and able to kick ass but not likely to unless it’s -necessary-. And pretty. I like em pretty (both genders). Well, that and the dnd fantasies, but… um… those are embarrassing _sheepish grin_ (I can’t help it. I’m in love with Drizzt _wince_ don’t beat me, I have fantasies about wandering the woods with an elven ranger, or … well… lol anything with elves eep. ) -Elthia ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/23 "2000-06-15T16:38:22Z")
> [@](#): > > Try it in the front seat of a Pinto… Try it in the back seat of a Chevette…in a farmers field…in February… Keith ---
**Author:** ![obfusciatrist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4af34b/32.png) [@obfusciatrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obfusciatrist)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/24 "2000-06-15T16:53:40Z")
How about a highway rest stop in a Festiva? ---
**Author:** ![Kiki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dc4da7/32.png) [@Kiki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiki)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/25 "2000-06-15T19:37:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > [Try it in the back seat of a Chevette…in a farmers field…in February… > Keith > \*\* This is kind of freaky. **I** had a Chevette… it was the back seat… in a farmers field… in February… was that you? Surely not! ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/26 "2000-06-15T19:38:27Z")
Most of my fantasies involve very uncomplicated things like holding hands. This is probably because I have yet to have a girlfriend. Oh well. However, I can _make_ fantasies that are pretty decent. They just don’t last very long because of inexperience \ ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/27 "2000-06-15T19:40:08Z")
I have one that involves a radio-operated remote-controlled device. It would be the approximate shape and size of a lightdays panty liner. The remote would have a dial marked “vib. speed” and another marked “vib. intensity”… ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/28 "2000-06-15T19:47:20Z")
To put your mind at ease Rachelle it was my Chevette. I guess Kansas is more like Saskatchewan then we realized. 😉 Keith ---
**Author:** ![Kiki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dc4da7/32.png) [@Kiki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiki)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/29 "2000-06-15T19:49:06Z")
I don’t really have any fantasies. My boyfriend and I do everything… and I mean **everything**!! I don’t like to be restrained though, I’ve never liked that. It’s not a trust issue or anything, it just bothers me. However, I do like to tie up my man and tease the shit out of him! I would like to be able to surprise my BF by having him come home from work and find a note telling him to take a shower and go lay down naked on the bed. Then I’d slink in wearing some sexy outfit and proceed to do a striptease for him. I’d let him watch me take my outfit off but I wouldn’t let him touch me with his hands but I’m allowed to touch him and kiss him anywhere I want. I would start kissing his face, slowly over to his ears, down his neck, across his chest, down his stomach, down to… (You don’t need to know this part) And after having the best sex of our lives we would just lay there holding each other, talking, carressing, kissing, and then we’d start all over and make love again and again and again. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/30 "2000-06-15T19:50:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > I would, for once in my life, like to do it in a car. > \*\* I was twenty-two before I knew it could be done any other place. > [@](#): > > It would begin with my BF “kidnapping” me from some public place and dragging me to the car, where he would blindfold me and whisk me off to a previous undisclosed place. Maybe a local hotel or something. Then he would hand cuff me to the bed (I already have the handcuffs) and begin an elaborate game of teasing etc etc. > The “teasing” would involve feathers, chocolate sauce and pudding, whipped cream, a blind fold. > Anyway, it would continue until I can’t take it anymore, and then he would stop and leave the room. Forcing me to cool down. > When I am properly cooled back down, he would come back and do it again. **Pepperlandgirl,** you got this idea from my wife, right? This is absolutely her favorite fantasy—she adds honey to your food list—I am getting way too fat. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/31 "2000-06-15T19:57:08Z")
AHunter3 sez: > [@](#): > > \*\* > I have one that involves a radio-operated remote-controlled device. It would be the approximate shape and size of a lightdays panty liner. The remote would have a dial marked “vib. speed” and another marked “vib. intensity”… > \*\* Reminiscent of the Venus Butterfly, but wireless. All who have been in chat recently have surely heard my impotence plan. The day I can’t get it up anymore will be a wonderful day, in my eyes. I will drive straight to the urologists’ office. I will then get two penile implants. One will pump it up, the other one will make it vibrate. I will be the single biggest slutpuppy at the nursing home, I promise you that! ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/32 "2000-06-15T20:32:13Z")
Never in a car? Oh Cynical, what a shame! Hondas, in the back seat are okay, not the front. Broncos have excellent back seats…see my stripping while he’s driving post (In the Fire Love thread). 1999 Corvettes drivers seats are very accomodating. The best was my 95 Suburban, up near Evergreen. Lot’s of room to fool around 😉 I advise the ladies, never give a guy a blow job while he’s driving…you might accidentally bite. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/33 "2000-06-15T20:35:25Z")
texchick68 said: “I advise the ladies, never give a guy a blow job while he’s driving…you might accidentally bite.” Or you might do such a good job that he loses control of the car . . . think about explaining THAT accident to anyone . . . "Honestly, officer, I was looking at a stain on his pants and I guess he accelerated or something . . . " Officer: “And gee, I wonder what the stain turned out to be?” ---
**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/34 "2000-06-15T20:49:42Z")
Damn, techchick! That description of going down the Colorado by Moab made me shiver! You have good fantasies. Hmmmm… I don’t think I’ll share any of mine here. They mostly involve trying to set up my SO with other guys. Y’know how a lot of guys have that lesbian fantasy? I’m the same way - give me a couple gay guys to watch and I’d be thrilled. Unfortunately, SO will have nothing to do with it. _sigh_. I think that’s probably why it’s my #1 main fantasy right now, as he’s up for just about anything else. On another note, we just bought nifty costumes for the Rennaisance Festival this weekend. His niece is in town, and we’re taking her, so we decided to spring for cool medieval clothes. When we took them out of the box, my first thought was “Oh boy, we could do some fun ‘Lord of the Castle chases down the serving wench’ stuff with these!” Hmmmm… ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/35 "2000-06-15T20:53:13Z")
> [@](#): > > ``` > Pepperlandgirl, you got this idea from my wife, right? This is absolutely her favorite fantasy---she > adds honey to your food list---I am getting way too fat. > > ``` Oh, there’s honey involved. But it’s much later, and used in a slightly different way 😉 > [@](#): > > They mostly involve trying to set up my SO with other guys. > Y’know how a lot of guys have that lesbian fantasy? I’m the same way - give me a couple gay guys to watch and I’d > be thrilled. I’m the same way. But I think I might have more luck than you. I haven’t given up hope yet, and he usually gives into me after I beg long enough. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/36 "2000-06-15T21:16:13Z")
I guess just to be with someone I love, and who loves me. That’s all. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/37 "2000-06-15T21:17:14Z")
> [@](#): > > Try it in the back seat of a Chevette…in a farmers field…in February… Try the backseat of an 86 Camero, in the parking lot of a Fiesta… My main fantasy right now is to be at a bar and get picked up by a strange woman. She’d barely say two sentences to me: We’d go to some sleazy motel and get it on. It’s a turn on because it’s so out of character for me: I’m a shy gentleman, and I’d be too afraid of catching some sort of disease. The good news is, my super cool GF said she’s gonna help me out with this one sometime… ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/38 "2000-06-15T21:55:20Z")
Without getting too graphic, I have always wanted to try…“The Money Shot” Can’t help it people, I just do. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/39 "2000-06-15T22:17:00Z")
:::trudges morosely over to TennHippie’s corner::: Hi there! Wanna sit & swap non-sex fantasies? Sigh. ---
**Author:** ![CatsPaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f1d935/32.png) [@CatsPaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CatsPaw)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2000, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443/40 "2000-06-15T22:31:03Z")
I saw Mr. Cynical blowing Danielwithhisbuttinatoilet. That’s one fantasy that’s not really kinky, though, because it’s so common. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-about-your-really-kinky-fantasies/22443.md?page=3)