# Tell us why you will be banned under the new rules **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 24, 2009, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253 "2009-02-24T19:22:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/61 "2009-02-24T20:49:50Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > No, no, that’s why **SKALD** will be banned. You are not he. I know this, because I am he, and you are not I. I checked just to be sure. If **Skald** gets banned, I’ll be banned shortly thereafter for cutting a promo on whichever Admin did it. Said promo will make the target’s ears bleed, and may cause the servers to melt, so vile and vituperative will it be. ---
**Author:** ![woodstockbirdybird](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/woodstockbirdybird/32/7905_2.png) [@woodstockbirdybird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/woodstockbirdybird)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/62 "2009-02-24T20:50:22Z")
> [@Omegaman](#): > > Um, because I’m not a literary giant. When I care to tell someone to “fuck off” that’s just what I say. Just like in real life. I’m not very well educated and if I have to come up with some swishy ass way to insult some fucking snapperhead who is working my nerves, I doubt I’ll last very long. > > Nice job **Ed**. You’re really well on your way to making sure every one that doesn’t meet your academic and social standards just doesn’t post here. QFT. I always want to lob a “fuck off” at those pussies who come into a thread acting all supercilious with their “vulgarity is the sign of an unimaginative mind” bullshit. Now it looks like they won. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/63 "2009-02-24T20:53:23Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > If **Skald** gets banned, I’ll be banned shortly thereafter for cutting a promo on whichever Admin did it. Said promo will make the target’s ears bleed, and may cause the servers to melt, so vile and vituperative will it be. Thanks. Um.. what does cutting a promo mean? ETA: Never mind. I remembered that I am connected to a vast storehouse of knowledge through a miraculous device developed by the Holy Spirit so that **kanicbird** and **ITR champion** can proselytize, and Googled it. Also Kim told me. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/64 "2009-02-24T20:55:43Z")
For a tribute reading of George Carlin’s list. I have the Heavy Seven\* memorized, but he had a longer version that I don’t have a copy of yet. Like Mtgman, I’m too mild manored to go off in the pit myself, but do enjoy browsing. It’s just not the pit without a chance of profanity. Yllaria - Shit, piss, cunt, fuck, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/65 "2009-02-24T20:56:49Z")
> [@Omegaman](#): > > I’m not very well educated and if I have to come up with some swishy ass way to insult some fucking snapperhead who is working my nerves, I doubt I’ll last very long. Nonsense. You did very well at coming up with “some swishy ass way to insult some fucking snapperhead who is working my nerves” that did not involve beating them up. Buy a thesaurus, you fucking snapperhead. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/66 "2009-02-24T21:06:41Z")
> [@woodstockbirdybird](#): > > QFT. I always want to lob a “fuck off” at those pussies who come into a thread acting all supercilious with their “vulgarity is the sign of an unimaginative mind” bullshit. Now it looks like they won. I haven’t actually seen posters do that. Are they so boring that my eyes just glaze over at their posts and they don’t register? Heck, I rarely curse on the board and I try not to IRL and I see no benefit to most of these changes. ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/67 "2009-02-24T21:14:35Z")
Ok, all kidding aside let’s be honest here for a moment. What is really going to happen is that we are going to get all bent out of shape for a little while (like we did when the place went to paid subscriptions or when they started with the banner ads) and then we will calm down and continue to hang around this once interesting website until the aggressive mediocrity, inconsistency and erosion of standards leads to its inevitable demise. Read some old threads sometime and you will see what I mean. This place isn’t even within shouting distance of how interesting and vital it used to be. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/68 "2009-02-24T21:16:41Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > Nonsense. You did very well at coming up with “some swishy ass way to insult some fucking snapperhead who is working my nerves” that did not involve beating them up. > > Buy a thesaurus, you fucking snapperhead. Good thing they have them online. I had to look up QFT.😉 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/69 "2009-02-24T21:17:05Z")
> [@Binarydrone](#): > > Ok, all kidding aside let’s be honest here for a moment. What is really going to happen is that we are going to get all bent out of shape for a little while (like we did when the place went to paid subscriptions or when they started with the banner ads) and then we will calm down and continue to hang around this once interesting website until the aggressive mediocrity, inconsistency and erosion of standards leads to its inevitable demise. Read some old threads sometime and you will see what I mean. This place isn’t even within shouting distance of how interesting and vital it used to be. Only the Communists benefit from you saying such things. ---
**Author:** ![woodstockbirdybird](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/woodstockbirdybird/32/7905_2.png) [@woodstockbirdybird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/woodstockbirdybird)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/70 "2009-02-24T21:18:15Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > I haven’t actually seen posters do that. Are they so boring that my eyes just glaze over at their posts and they don’t register? Could be; they’re nearly that boring to me. But yeah, I’ve seen it a couple times. ---
**Author:** ![Weird\_With\_Words](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weird_with_words/32/385_2.png) [@Weird\_With\_Words](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weird_With_Words)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/71 "2009-02-24T21:32:57Z")
Haven’t posted in a long time. Heck, not even the election of my favored candidate was enough to bring me back; but after hearing about this, I couldn’t resist registering my opinion: This is some very weak sauce. This is the weakest sauce since mayo. This is the weakest sauce since mushroom soup. This is the weakest sauce since “Newman’s Own Pee”. If this sauce were any weaker it would be water. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/72 "2009-02-24T21:34:34Z")
> [@woodstockbirdybird](#): > > QFT. I always want to lob a “fuck off” at those pussies who come into a thread acting all supercilious with their “vulgarity is the sign of an unimaginative mind” bullshit. Now it looks like they won. I can come up with some REALLY creative vulgarity if anyone is interested! (Sadly, you’ll have to PM me, as I can’t offer it here, of course) :rolleyes: (Are we allowed to say “UN-fuck you?”) ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/73 "2009-02-24T21:38:06Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I can come up with some REALLY creative vulgarity if anyone is interested! > > (Sadly, you’ll have to PM me, as I can’t offer it here, of course) :rolleyes: > (Are we allowed to say “UN-fuck you?”) As I read the new Pit rules, vulgarity is not altogether forbidden in the way that hate speech (however nebulously defined) is. So go ahead. Share with us your creative coarseness. I double-dog dare you, you Etruscan trollop. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/74 "2009-02-24T21:45:31Z")
I’m drunk! ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/75 "2009-02-24T21:48:07Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > I’m drunk! No, you’re high. You’re so high you not only don’t know you’re high, but you think you’re drunk rather than high. anyway, the point is that you shouldn’t post when your blood sugar is low. Can someone please teleport me a donut? ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Joe\_Meager](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bb73d2/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Joe\_Meager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Joe_Meager)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/76 "2009-02-24T21:51:59Z")
(pssssst… fuck me) ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/77 "2009-02-24T21:57:11Z")
These new rules are fucking stupid. I could elaborate as to how they are stupid, but I think it’s pretty obvious to anyone with a functional brain cell. ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/78 "2009-02-24T22:07:14Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > I went off the deep end once and said to **Harborwolf** , “Oh fuck you, you pompous asshole” which I should have apologized for before now. Sorry … didn’t really mean it, I was just all het-up. > > But here’s the thing. I was pissed off at him. Reading back on it now, I think it was more from a misunderstanding than a true argument, and I honestly took a step back and thought to myself, “wow, that was pretty uncalled for … eh, water under the bridge.” > > But I’m pretty sure \*\*Harborwolf \*\*doesn’t hate me because of it – or maybe he does. But it was, as far as I’m concerned, a healthy vent. No different that what I’d say to my best friend face to face if we had been having the same argument. > > There will be suicide-FUCK YOU-bannings … I can feel them coming. Hate you because of it? Fuck you you pompous asshole is practically my name. It would be officially, but I can never figure out how to portion properly for first, middle, and last names. Also my wife would probably be unhappy if her last name suddenly became “asshole.” Women are strange like that. Personally, I’ll likely get banned for the coarse languange. I’m a big fan of throwing $10 words around, but goldurnit swear words are just so ding danged appropriate sometimes. I wonder if anyone will do a “Seven words you can’t say in the pit.” I think it’s safe now that Carlin’s dead. ---
**Author:** ![jali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecae2f/32.png) [@jali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jali)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/79 "2009-02-24T22:14:21Z")
For saying this: The Morman Church sent a check for $84,000.73 for the purchase of a many copies of a certain book and the promise of great reviews IF and only if the tone of the Pit were to change drastically. Said check has been cashed. ---
**Author:** ![Earthworm\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f07891/32.png) [@Earthworm\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthworm_Jim)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2009, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253/80 "2009-02-24T22:22:15Z")
New rules, eh? \ … So you can’t pit other posters, you can’t pit the mods, and you can’t pit the board itself. The pit’s going to be pretty quiet. My [last rant](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=493921) may have violated the “no obscentiy in the title” dictum … 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-why-you-will-be-banned-under-the-new-rules/487253.md?page=5)