# Terms of endearment that should really never be revealed outside the relationship.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [April 10, 2007, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431 "2007-04-10T02:39:05Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/1 "2007-04-10T02:39:05Z")

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The “redneck terms of endearment” thread got me thinking a little tangentially about terms of endearment in general, and embarrassing/“wrong” ones in particular.

I think there is a special class of terms of endearment that should really be on a need-to-know basis.

My friend Joe and his wife, by way of an example, refer to each other as “Poopie” and “Pooper.” I think that this is something that should probably have been kept between them.

Me, I call my girlfriend “sexy-pants.” That’s probably not _too_ bad.

A combination of the quasi-anonymity of the SDMB and the recklessness that comes of having two beers with dinner is enough to allow me to admit that her pet name for me is _“mon petit crayon d’amour.”_

I would almost certainly move to Tuktayuktuk at first light (without packing) should any of my meat-space friends learn of this.

So, uh… y’all have any terms of endearment that are worse than that?

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**Author:** ![Fetchund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b2d939/32.png) [@Fetchund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fetchund)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/2 "2007-04-10T02:45:09Z")

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Ummmm… The Spouse is…

Skink.  
(Sorry, honey!)

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**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/3 "2007-04-10T02:46:43Z")

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I had a girlfriend that called me “Bunny Fluff”. I’d rather that was not widely known…

:smack: Crap, I’m on the internets!

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**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/4 "2007-04-10T03:07:39Z")

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My ex wife called me Scumby. Being Dopers somebody probably remembers the T-shirt line that inspired it.

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**Author:** ![RedRosesForMe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@RedRosesForMe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedRosesForMe)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/5 "2007-04-10T03:16:55Z")

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A friend called his GF Princess of Sugar Bear Island. I found that rather gross.

_vomit_

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**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/6 "2007-04-10T04:11:25Z")

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My first serious GF had I sometimes called “Lion,” and she called me “Gazelle.” Not that bad, at first glance, unless you know the reasons. See, I was a virgin when we started dating, and she had a reputation for “liking the boys,” as it were. So someone likened the physical aspects of our relationship to a lion taking down a gazelle on the Serengeti.

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**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/7 "2007-04-10T04:24:21Z")

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I always thought “StinkyPaws” was something that would have been better not shared.

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**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/8 "2007-04-10T04:27:05Z")

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[QUOTE=Stuffy]  
My ex wife called me Scumby. Being Dopers somebody probably remembers the T-shirt line that inspired it.  
[/QUOTE]

I miss my [Scumby shirt!](http://www.retroduck.com/images/products/99/99-0092r.jpg)

A former coworker routinely referred to his missus as “the bong whore.”

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**Author:** ![Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/edb3f5/32.png) [@Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Push_Up_Bra)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/9 "2007-04-10T06:55:44Z")

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I call the boyfriend ‘Pumpkinhead’ quite a lot. Has nothing to do with the shape of his head. It’s just another term of endearment that my mother bastardized and passed along to me. He gets called Princess Head a lot. Actually, so do a lot of people.

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**Author:** ![hawksgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@hawksgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hawksgirl)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/10 "2007-04-10T06:59:42Z")

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One of my co-workers is _kind of_ dating a doctor at work.

We found out that they have names for each other.

His name is Pookie. If I didn’t want to lose my job, I’d call him Dr. Pookie when I page him one day.

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**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/11 "2007-04-10T08:58:34Z")

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[QUOTE=alice\_in\_wonderland]  
I always thought “StinkyPaws” was something that would have been better not shared.  
[/QUOTE]  
You HAD to bring that up! Sheesh, thats twice in one week!

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**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/12 "2007-04-10T09:48:34Z")

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Two of my best friends (who happen to date each other)…well, he has to call her “pookie” at least once every time they talk on the phone. I can’t help but snicker every time. Of course, his loud protestations (“Shut up. Shut UP! shut UP! I…I…I…shut up!”) don’t help his case one lousy bit. 😃 Or, what **hawksgirl** said.

As for me, I always thought pet names were silly and there’d have to be some really special inside joke for me to be caught dead using one.

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**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/13 "2007-04-10T12:45:01Z")

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My ex and I would use the names Dinosnarf and Planarium. Please don’t ask me to explain them.

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**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/14 "2007-04-10T13:42:15Z")

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In the recent movie **The Queen** , at one point HRH Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, hops into bed with HM Queen Elizabeth of the United Kingdom, Canada, Australia, and many other realms. As he does, he says, “Move over, cabbage.” I really feel that that should not have been revealed outside that nearly 60-year-old marriage.

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**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/15 "2007-04-10T14:00:21Z")

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My wife and I have a couple friend who refer to each other as “Hoss” - he tends to give friends nicknames (he is _nothing_ like George Bush, I am pleased to report, except for this particular habit). Anyway, his wife is a slim, very attractive blonde, so Hoss was (I guess) fun and counter-intuitive. She called him Hoss back for fun and it stuck.

Then it took a dangerous turn.

“Hoss” evolved into a variety of forms. Eventually - I don’t know how since I wasn’t monitoring in detail thank god - he began calling her “Hoser.” Since it was a clear evolution from Hoss, she didn’t think anything of it.

Somehow, it came out to some friends (we were likely the only ones who knew about all this since we’re pretty close). The friends calmly (read: laughing until crying) explained that Hoser basically means “cumbucket.” Wife friend was NOT amused - and Husband, who knew the meaning, but clearly didn’t mean THAT; it was merely a play on Hoss - was in the doghouse for a LONG time.

They just call each other Hoss now.

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**Author:** ![Eleanor\_of\_Aquitaine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Eleanor\_of\_Aquitaine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleanor_of_Aquitaine)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/16 "2007-04-10T14:09:22Z")

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Pet names are only secret until your first baby learns to talk and refers to you as “Pookie” at a family gathering.

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**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/17 "2007-04-10T14:12:45Z")

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My wife calls me “Bubbe”, for [bubele](http://www.yiddishdictionaryonline.com/).

My grandfather used to call my grandmother “Shorty”.

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/18 "2007-04-10T14:13:17Z")

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[QUOTE=WordMan]  
The friends calmly (read: laughing until crying) explained that Hoser basically means “cumbucket.”  
[/QUOTE]

What pile of lowlife slime stole [hoser](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hoser) from the Canucks and corrupted it? Bring me his head!

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**Author:** ![Queuing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/90ced4/32.png) [@Queuing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queuing)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/19 "2007-04-10T14:24:07Z")

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[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]  
What pile of lowlife slime stole [hoser](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hoser) from the Canucks and corrupted it? Bring me his head!  
[/QUOTE]

I would like to second this motion! Seriuosly, what the hell? Bob and Doug McKenzie will get you!

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**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\
**Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terms-of-endearment-that-should-really-never-be-revealed-outside-the-relationship/399431/20 "2007-04-10T14:59:16Z")

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Yes, there is the Canadian use. But there is also the term [Hosebag](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hosebag) of which, at least back in the 90’s when I actually hung around guys who used the term, was often shortened to Hoser, no doubt in part because the word was out there in use by the SCTV guys…

- Dude, that chick was such a skeevy hosebag!
- I know, dude - what a complete hoser - what were you thinking?!

:smack:

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