# Terrell Owens: A greedy, self-centered shitstain **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 9, 2004, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228 "2004-03-09T03:04:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Enginerd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bcef8e/32.png) [@Enginerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enginerd)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/61 "2004-03-11T18:47:54Z")
If Jamal stays out of the pokey AND out of the NFL’s substance abuse program. He served a 4 game suspension two years ago while he was rehabilitating his knee - according to the league’s regular program, the next offense comes with a year long suspension. The only argument I can think of against that is that the incident in question occured in 2000, before he was an NFL player, and certainly before his first two offenses. I don’t know how the NFL will view that, but it should count for something. ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/62 "2004-03-11T19:38:29Z")
> [@](#): > > Secondly, while many of the specifics of the NFL’s substance-abuse program and its members are confidential, this much is known: Having been clean for two years, since serving a four-game suspension for a second-strike violation in November 2001, Lewis is no longer enrolled in the league’s drug program. He has officially been out of it since the conclusion of this month’s Pro Bowl. > > So even if Lewis was convicted of the drug charges in 2005, or plea-bargained a lesser sentence of some sort earlier than that, he would not be in line for one-year suspension by the league as a third-strike offender under the NFL’s drug policy. He would instead be confidentially re-enrolled in the program as a first-timer, which carries no penalty and requires mandatory treatment and testing. [Don Banks of SI.com](http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2004/writers/don_banks/02/26/lewis.whatsnext/) ---
**Author:** ![Enginerd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bcef8e/32.png) [@Enginerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enginerd)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/63 "2004-03-11T19:49:08Z")
You just made my day, **mouthbreather** - thanks! Have you got another cite that says he’ll stay out of jail? ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/64 "2004-03-11T20:08:18Z")
No link. In fact, it’s my civic duty as a Steelers fan – I will be sending a donation to the prosecution fund. Also, I’m going to plant evidence and bribe witnesses. I will be busy in the upcomming months. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/65 "2004-03-11T20:39:35Z")
It’s good to know you guys don’t take the rivalry too seriously. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5ac83/32.png) [@The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mad_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/66 "2004-03-11T21:01:04Z")
It sounds like a good plan on paper, **mouthbreather,** but if you plan on planting evidence you had better cover your tracks carefully. Someone tried to frame Jerome Bettis two seasons ago for sexual assault; they were partially successful- his head wasn’t in the game and it showed, even though he was exonerated. Of course, I’m not suggesting you should do anything _illegal…_😃 ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/67 "2004-03-12T00:54:51Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#): > > It’s good to know you guys don’t take the rivalry too seriously. 😃 Just wait until I bomb Heinz Field… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Enginerd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bcef8e/32.png) [@Enginerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enginerd)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/68 "2004-03-12T01:09:30Z")
Careful with that bomb, Dave - the wind’s tricky around those goalposts. ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/69 "2004-03-12T07:11:30Z")
Dave, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but _Black Sunday_ was a movie, and _The Sum of All Fears_ was a book (the book was way better than the movie, but the movie was awesome in that they wiped Baltimore out 😃 ). Just in case you didn’t know. [sub]Bomb Heinz Field my ass…[/sub] 😛 ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/70 "2004-03-12T11:29:20Z")
> [@Airman Doors](#): > > Dave, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but _Black Sunday_ was a movie, and _The Sum of All Fears_ was a book (the book was way better than the movie, but the movie was awesome in that they wiped Baltimore out 😃 ). > > Just in case you didn’t know. I didn’t know that. I guess I know what I’m watching this weekend. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/71 "2004-03-12T13:02:45Z")
> [@Airman Doors](#): > > [sub]Bomb Heinz Field my ass…[/sub] 😛 Oh, I don’t think I’ll bother. The Stillers did enough bombing at Heinz field last year to last for quite a while, don’cha think? ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/72 "2004-03-12T13:28:26Z")
Ooooh… that was cold, Dave. Good, but cold. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5ac83/32.png) [@The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mad_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/73 "2004-03-12T16:55:33Z")
No fair. He set up his own joke. Just imagine if Lewis had made the last few yards in that game. We would never hear the end of it. The draft is still coming… ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/74 "2004-03-16T20:58:31Z")
Apparently, TO is going to get his wish. > **[Philly freedom: Owens will play for Eagles](https://www.espn.com/nfl/news/story?id=1760284)** > > Terrell Owens will get his wish to play for the Eagles, following a settlement reached Tuesday before an arbitrator could rule on the star receiver's case to become a free agent. > [@](#): > > PHILADELPHIA – Terrell Owens will get his wish to play for the Philadelphia Eagles, following a settlement reached Tuesday before an arbitrator could rule on the star receiver’s case to become a free agent. > > The San Francisco 49ers, Baltimore Ravens and Eagles agreed to a deal to send Owens to Philadelphia, which will sign him to a seven-year contract worth $42 million, [ESPN.com](http://ESPN.com)’s John Clayton reports. > > The Eagles sent a fifth-round draft pick to Baltimore and defensive end Brandon Whiting to San Francisco. The Ravens get back the second-round pick they sent to the 49ers for Owens. So, what have we learned boys and girls? Bitch and moan loud enough and you’ll get your way. Let’s see if that cancer will eat up the Eagles the same way it was eating up the 49ers. Good luck, Philadelphia. You’re going to need it. ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/75 "2004-03-16T21:16:04Z")
> [@](#): > > Let’s see if that cancer will eat up the Eagles the same way it was eating up the 49ers. That’s not even half the fucking problem. The problem is that even if they win it all this year, I have to listen to all those “missing piece” stories. I have to listen to him gloat after my team wins. I have to cheer for McNabb to get a first down by throwing to anyone except Shitstain. Someone pressured the Ravens on this, or else they knew they were going to lose the hearing. WTF are they thinking cutting a deal? As it is, they get a 5th rounder … whoop dee do. I only hope the Eagles play Baltimore sometime soon, and Ray Lewis gets to lay him out. My team just got an all-pro and I’m pissed. Fuck. I’d rather see my team lose with class … hell, I’d frankly _rather_ see them torn apart than win a championship and have that asshole get credit for it. ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/76 "2004-03-16T21:21:51Z")
I wouldn’t worry about it, **furt**. The Eagles will choke again this year, just like the previous 44. ---
**Author:** ![PhiloVance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e19adc/32.png) [@PhiloVance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhiloVance)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/77 "2004-03-16T21:32:15Z")
What is it they say in the theatre? > [@](#): > > Break a leg, T.O. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/78 "2004-03-16T21:47:52Z")
> [@furt](#): > > That’s not even half the fucking problem. The problem is that even if they win it all this year, I have to listen to all those “missing piece” stories. I have to listen to him gloat after my team wins. I have to cheer for McNabb to get a first down by throwing to anyone except Shitstain. Wow, I hadn’t even thought about that. That would be totally in his character as well. “The Eagles couldn’t win the NFC Championship without me. Now that I play for them, they’re going to the Superbowl! Yay me!” I just hope that Lavar Arrington gets a nice clean shot at him sometime this year and retires his overhyped ass. ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/79 "2004-03-16T21:50:02Z")
Ray Ratto nailed it: > [@](#): > > Philadelphia is not nearly so forgiving. True, their wide receivers are of profoundly modest talent, but Eagle fans do not subscribe to the “we’ll-take-what-we-can-get” theory, and never have. They want effort and production, and are downright homicidal when they don’t get at least the effort. > > In other words, Philadelphia can be a real bitch. > … > In short, we are talking blood on the moon here, children. This marriage comes straight from Satan’s left-hand suit pocket, and it will end very, very badly. All I can say is anybody remember Ricky Watters? When Owens pusses out on a crossing route and gets booed, he’ll pout and the whole thing will get ugly. He’s not man enough to stand up under the boos from the 700 level,\* and the more he cries, the more they’ll boo. God help McNabb and Reid. Oh, and \*\*Airman … \*\* Fuck you! 😉 \*Yes, I know, the Vet is history. I’ve no idea what the cheap seats in the Linc are called. ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2004, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228/80 "2004-03-16T21:55:49Z")
Philly fans can be a nasty bunch. I give one week to TO before he gets yanked (or at least booed all the time) for sucking. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terrell-owens-a-greedy-self-centered-shitstain/233228.md?page=5)