# Tesla Cybertruck **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 23, 2019, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866 "2019-11-23T10:32:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 54
**Author:** ![Maserschmidt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maserschmidt/32/18829_2.png) [@Maserschmidt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maserschmidt)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2024, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1061 "2024-05-21T18:20:05Z")
I have never in 1 million years wanted one of these, but this one is so close to the video game Battlezone that I feel like I must have it. [https://x.com/krassenstein/status/1792610762504233156?s=61&t=7zPHcBzjb1UW-wh6DrDc3g](https://x.com/krassenstein/status/1792610762504233156?s=61&t=7zPHcBzjb1UW-wh6DrDc3g) ETA I showed this to my wife and told her I was going to go buy it, and she asked me what a cybertruck was. Just a reminder of the social media bubble we live in. ---
**Author:** ![Boudicca90](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boudicca90/32/16818_2.png) [@Boudicca90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boudicca90)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2024, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1062 "2024-05-21T18:26:15Z")
The Cybertruck is the ugliest vehicle I’ve seen in a long time. I’ve seen some wraps out there that make it look somewhat better, but that’s just putting lipstick on a pig at this point. I hope it ends up failing hard, but there are a lot of brainwashed Musk fanboys out there. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2024, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1063 "2024-05-21T18:33:20Z")
Why do you want it to fail? I would walk everywhere before I bought one but I don’t care if other people like them. ---
**Author:** ![Boudicca90](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boudicca90/32/16818_2.png) [@Boudicca90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boudicca90)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2024, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1064 "2024-05-21T18:36:15Z")
Elon Musk is a transphobic and white supremacist asshole, so I tend to root for his failure. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2024, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1065 "2024-05-21T18:45:45Z")
> [@Maserschmidt](#): > > I have never in 1 million years wanted one of these, but this one is so close to the video game Battlezone that I feel like I must have it I still don’t want one but that color at least amusingly fits the style better than the brushed steel does. That guy seems like he’s leaning into it in a humorous way. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2024, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1066 "2024-05-21T19:43:14Z")
I have found the winner of the worst Cybertruck wrap contest. > **[Kid Rock's General Lee Cybertruck Rolls So Many Bad Ideas Into One](https://autos.yahoo.com/kid-rocks-general-lee-cybertruck-171500667.html)** > > Remember “The Dukes Of Hazzard,” that neat little show that went off the air 40 years ago yet inexplicably remains a major part of car culture to this day? Well, Kid Rock remembers, and he apparently loved the show so much that he elected to adorn a... ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1067 "2024-05-22T07:36:44Z")
My friend described the Cybertruck as looking like “something that hasn’t finished rendering”. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1068 "2024-05-22T10:42:48Z")
:golf clap: ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1069 "2024-05-22T11:57:00Z")
I kept trying to come up with something to describe its weird pixelated-in-the-real-world look and couldn’t quite get there. That’s perfect. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1070 "2024-05-22T13:42:34Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > It’s apparently very practical to use as a work truck in nearly every respect. I’ve seen lots of work trucks with a lock box in the front of the bed which is used to carry tools. With a box you can’t carry a sheet of plywood but you still have most of your bed available to haul stuff. With the high height of the sides of the bed up front I wonder how practical this is for all but the tallest people? I also think this should be the official vehicle of the mayor of Boston; their brutalist [City Hall](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_City_Hall#/media/File:Boston_City_Hall_exterior_02.jpg) doesn’t look like it’s finished, either despite being 55 yo; it would work parked there. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1071 "2024-05-22T13:49:15Z")
I finally saw one in person today in Chicago in the South Loop. Unfortunately, it was wrapped in a shitton of company branding (though I’ve already forgotten for whom) and a weird red-tan-brown-black kind of overall color scheme. It just looked like an aggressively polygonal billboard of some sort. What I was most surprised by was it was smaller than I had imagined it, despite seeing pictures and videos of it with humans nearby for scale. I was expecting maybe more the size of an F350 or something. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1072 "2024-05-22T15:12:24Z")
> [@Maserschmidt](#): > > but this one is so close to the video game Battlezone that I feel like I must have it. The best design 1980 vector graphics had to offer! Where’s a buzzing missile when you need one. > [@Johnny\_Bravo](#): > > I kept trying to come up with something to describe its weird pixelated-in-the-real-world look and couldn’t quite get there. That’s perfect. At first, I thought that video referenced above, the sublime green truck, WAS a cg animation, the way it moved. It looked totally fake. ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1073 "2024-05-22T16:47:10Z")
> [@markn\_1](#): > > My friend described the Cybertruck as looking like “something that hasn’t finished rendering”. > [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > The best design 1980 vector graphics had to offer! Where’s a buzzing missile when you need one. Or as I described it to a friend and fellow fan: “They -finally- got the Reverse Digitizer from Tron (1982) working! I’ve seen proof (points to Cybertruck)!” ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1074 "2024-05-22T19:42:37Z")
Looks just like a roly-poly, I think it is squeeee totes adorbs. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armadillidium\_vulgare](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armadillidium_vulgare) ---
**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2024, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1075 "2024-05-22T23:15:03Z")
> [@GargoyleWB](#): > > squeeee totes adorbs Um, thanks? ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Strangelove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.strangelove/32/6613_2.png) [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2024, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1076 "2024-05-23T05:48:04Z")
To no one’s surprise, the complaint about tedious performative declarations about ugliness set off a long chain of tedious performative declarations about how ugly it is. These guys did some pretty interesting off-road testing before and after the latest software update. The short version is: no locking diffs and poor throttle control made it perform fairly poorly before the update. As they say at the time, they tested the truck as they had it at the time (i.e., as it shipped), which of course is entirely fair. Nevertheless, the update added locking diff support and a bunch of other features, and it was an entirely different truck after that–vastly more capable. No, not comparable to a kitted-out Jeep or whatever, but does very well even against a Raptor. Before: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/Rpog04rpO2Y/maxresdefault.jpg "The Tesla Cybertruck Struggles in Our First Off-Road Test!") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpog04rpO2Y) After: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/IzU0raxRgsA/maxresdefault.jpg "Last Time The Cybertruck Struggled Off-Road: We Try It Again On Much Harder Trails!") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzU0raxRgsA) EVs in general have a lot of nice advantages over ICE in this kind of environment if charging isn’t a problem. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2024, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1077 "2024-05-23T12:08:11Z")
> [@Dr.Strangelove](#): > > tedious performative declarations To nobody’s surprise, the tedious performative declaration about tedious performative declarations set off a ted… ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2024, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1078 "2024-05-23T12:58:51Z")
Is a Ted like a Karen? I thought male Karens were Chads not Teds ---
**Author:** ![dtilque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d6d6ee/32.png) [@dtilque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dtilque)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2024, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1079 "2024-05-23T14:05:41Z")
Nah, Teds just do a lot of talking. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2024, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866/1080 "2024-05-23T14:13:14Z")
Here I thought that tedious performative declarations was the Musk Fan lifeblood… The guys from Donut _tried_ to take a [Cybertruck offroading](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7puuz6aYHdA) but, due to far underperforming range, it never actually made it to the course. They seemed to generally like the vehicle but it couldn’t do what the set out to do with it. (No embed because board software is being its usual self) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866.md?page=53) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tesla-cybertruck/843866.md?page=55)