# Texas Assholes, California Freaks. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 16, 2005, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273 "2005-08-16T14:54:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/41 "2005-08-16T18:10:47Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > Wait- I’m from the part of California that all the Okies (and other rednecks) came to during the Dust Bowl. Nah, you live in the part that some of the Okies settled in, the more industrious ones went on up to the hospitable part of the state, Salinas. And Woody Guthrie was a redneck? Who’d a thunk it… ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/42 "2005-08-16T18:11:29Z")
Folks, let just face the facts… We are all freaky assholes who get a kick out of looking at our wangs for amusement. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/43 "2005-08-16T18:15:02Z")
> [@Yeticus Rex](#): > > who get a kick out of looking at our wangs for amusement. I thought we established Florida as our wang? ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/44 "2005-08-16T18:20:35Z")
Man, it gives me the willies when someone uses the words “kick” and “wang” in the same sentance. Course, I used to like in Georgia so you’d kinda expect that. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/45 "2005-08-16T18:21:09Z")
Don’t forget the Nevadans chain-smoking between puffs off of their oxygen tanks while parked in their wheelchair at the video slot machine all day. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/46 "2005-08-16T18:22:05Z")
Sorry, make that “live”. When you “like” in Georgia, well, that’s something different entirely. ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/47 "2005-08-16T18:22:09Z")
Oh, yeah? Well, we _Nebraskans_… Ah, fuckit. Nobody cares. ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/48 "2005-08-16T18:48:54Z")
> [@Queen Tonya](#): > > Everything’s in the 80s, the humidity, the senior citizens, the average IQs, You forgot “the hairstyles.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/49 "2005-08-16T19:44:15Z")
> [@This Year's Model](#): > > Florida: America’s wang. > > There, happy now? Inordinately so. 😃 > [@NoClueBoy](#): > > Sorry, didn’t think you’d be up yet. A belated g’morning to you too. 😉 > [@Spiff](#): > > You forgot “the hairstyles.” 😃 You say that as if there’s something wrong with 80’s hair! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/50 "2005-08-16T19:50:12Z")
> [@niblet\_head](#): > > Oh, yeah? Well, we _Nebraskans_… Personally, I’ve always been charmed by the way you shatter when struck with a sharp blow from a hammer. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/51 "2005-08-16T20:03:29Z")
> [@NurseCarmen](#): > > > [@Yeticus Rex](#): > > > > who get a kick out of looking at our wangs for amusement. > > I thought we established Florida as our wang? Exactly…and we’ve established that we look at Florida as a source of amusement. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/52 "2005-08-16T20:16:47Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > Exactly…and we’ve established that we look at Florida as a source of amusement. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/53 "2005-08-16T20:43:15Z")
In Palm Beach, Verily, we Wang. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/54 "2005-08-16T20:44:01Z")
> [@Queen Tonya](#): > > People, people, people, I’m so disappointed! > > Florida doesn’t even get a mention? We’re messed up from importing all the dregs from Michigan, Ohio, New Jersey, New York, Ontario, etc. As we’re fond of saying here, last one out of Michigan please turn out the lights. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/55 "2005-08-16T20:53:46Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > We’re messed up from importing all the dregs from…New Jersey… Unfortunately, the Jersey ones come back home every summer. Fricking snowbirds. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/56 "2005-08-16T21:33:51Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > Unfortunately, the Jersey ones come back home every summer. Fricking snowbirds. Yeah, summer is a bit of a respite. But some stay. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/57 "2005-08-16T21:36:49Z")
Everybody knows that BC’ers are exactly like Californians, only colder, wetter, and more polite about it. Our former premier [Amor De Cosmos](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amor_de_Cosmos) brought the virus back from Cali in 1854. Still, we’re better off than those yahoos next door who came down with a nasty case of Texas infection. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/58 "2005-08-16T21:46:45Z")
I see no one’s mentioned Virginia, yet, so: RICHMOND, **Virginia**. - A rush to purchase $50 used laptops turned into a violent stampede Tuesday, with people getting thrown to the pavement, beaten with a folding chair and nearly driven over. One woman went so far as to wet herself rather than surrender her place in line. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/59 "2005-08-16T22:08:30Z")
> [@niblet\_head](#): > > Oh, yeah? Well, we _Nebraskans_… > > Ah, fuckit. Nobody cares. Yup. Right on that. It’s just you, & the wheat. Looots o wheat. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273/60 "2005-08-16T22:10:52Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > I see no one’s mentioned Virginia, yet, so: > > RICHMOND, **Virginia**. - A rush to purchase $50 used laptops turned into a violent stampede Tuesday, with people getting thrown to the pavement, beaten with a folding chair and nearly driven over. One woman went so far as to wet herself rather than surrender her place in line. Eh. So what? Virginians have been wetting themselves for _years_. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-assholes-california-freaks/317273.md?page=4)