# Texas: myths dispelled **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 10, 2004, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353 "2004-02-10T00:26:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/21 "2004-02-10T06:18:03Z")
Yeah, yeah, yeah **Gen’l** , you may imagine yourself a Texan, but you sure do not speak for me. ---
**Author:** ![TitoBenito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2acd7d/32.png) [@TitoBenito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TitoBenito)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/22 "2004-02-10T06:28:58Z")
> [@The General](#): > > I almost forgot. Montana doesn’t count, because my dad managed to cross it, border-to-border, north to south in one day. He drove like his ass was on fire, but he did it. You really can’t do that in Texas, because, if you’re on Interstate 35, you run into Austin. > > I will now discuss Austin, which isn’t really Texas: > > Goddamn bunch of pricks. They’ve been working on a 5 mile strech of 183 for a few decades now. The rest of us want 'em to move to New York, where they’d fit in. They almost elected a homeless transvestite to mayor, for Christ’s sake. Ms. (or Mr.) Cochrane certainly wouldn’t be the worst elected official in Texas. He may be nuts but I can’t see him being crazy enough to make a law up that makes you put a sticker on Dildos saying “not for internal use”, or try to remove sound scientic models from children’s textbooks. ---
**Author:** ![SirRay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@SirRay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SirRay)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/23 "2004-02-10T06:52:09Z")
So far in this thread, I do not see a single mention of Texas fire ants. As my Uncle Ed (who still does some Cattle raising around Chapel Hill) will tell you, you do not have a thread on texas without mentioning Texas fire ants (actually, ‘Damn Texas fire ants’). ---
**Author:** ![Loopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loopus/32/15343_2.png) [@Loopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopus)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/24 "2004-02-10T07:08:54Z")
> [@The General](#): > > The panhandle (north part, Yankee) is a little mountainous. You sure you’re not thinking of the _west_ part? As far as I know, the panhandle is pretty flat, as is most of the rest of the state > [@](#): > > Over half of the people here own at least one gun (mostly hunting rifles), but only about a third carry a gun. You gotta cite fer that, pardner? > [@](#): > > If you have a Texas license plate, your one of us. Unlike New England; my aunt moved there with her husband 15 years ago, and they’re still the “new folks.” On the other hand, I’ve met many Texans who are quick to claim that Dubya isn’t “really” Texan, despite the fact that he lived here almost all his life, from the age of (I think) four. ---
**Author:** ![Hugh\_Jass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4da419/32.png) [@Hugh\_Jass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hugh_Jass)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/25 "2004-02-10T07:15:32Z")
One must always keep this in mind: America needs Texas more than Texas needs America. ---
**Author:** ![angelicate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@angelicate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/angelicate)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/26 "2004-02-10T07:19:51Z")
> [@Ringo](#): > > Yeah, yeah, yeah **Gen’l** , you may imagine yourself a Texan, but you sure do not speak for me. He seems like the type of Texan I haven’t missed since moving out of the state a few years ago. ---
**Author:** ![ColonelDax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@ColonelDax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ColonelDax)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/27 "2004-02-10T12:42:44Z")
Correct me if I’m wrong here, but isn’t/wasn’t Texas history a required course at some academic level in all schools in the state? Anyone know if this is still the case? And does anyone know of any other U.S. state that requires or has required all students to complete a course dealing only with its own history? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/28 "2004-02-10T13:03:09Z")
> [@ColonelDax](#): > > Correct me if I’m wrong here, but isn’t/wasn’t Texas history a required course at some academic level in all schools in the state? Anyone know if this is still the case? And does anyone know of any other U.S. state that requires or has required all students to complete a course dealing only with its own history? Yes! 7th grade history is TEXAS history… God bless Texas. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/29 "2004-02-10T13:03:41Z")
> [@ColonelDax](#): > > Correct me if I’m wrong here, but isn’t/wasn’t Texas history a required course at some academic level in all schools in the state? Anyone know if this is still the case? And does anyone know of any other U.S. state that requires or has required all students to complete a course dealing only with its own history? I had to take Georgia history in Georgia. Very little of it remains with me. I am fairly sure there was Florida history in Florida as well, but I think I missed that by transferring there later in my high school career. Maybe it’s a southern thing. About the Bushes. Whether Texas begat them or not, they are certainly responsible for foisting them on the US at large. Do you think that the Conn. electoral votes would have won for either of them? And do you truly believe that even Texas voters would have gone for those two pansies if there wasn’t some Texas association (and a lot of money and dirty politics)? Beyond large cockroaches and occasionally overconfident and obnoxious citizens, what positive influences has Texas made for the United States? (Everyone knows the _real_ Cowboys are in Oklahoma, Wyoming and Montana) ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/30 "2004-02-10T13:03:44Z")
I lived in Texas for a number of years. Most Texans are nice people just like you can find all over the US. It’s only a tiny minority that are bragging, strutting, comic-opera cowboy dufuses. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/31 "2004-02-10T13:08:05Z")
Also, in Pennsylvania, 8th grade history is history of Pennsylvania. Residents of other states are proud of their history, too. It’s simply that Texas has that minority that feels the need to crow like a cock on a dungheap. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/32 "2004-02-10T13:13:33Z")
Is it true that because of the overcrowded cemetaries, when a Texan dies, s/he is given an enema so they can be buried in a shoebox? ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/33 "2004-02-10T13:32:06Z")
> [@vunderbob](#): > > Is it true that because of the overcrowded cemetaries, when a Texan dies, s/he is given an enema so they can be buried in a shoebox? That’s funny. I think most states have a “self” history class around the 7th or 8th grade. I did. And yes, **Pablito** , that is why we Sandlappers are so proud of SC. [/sarcasm] ---
**Author:** ![notquitekarpov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@notquitekarpov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notquitekarpov)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/34 "2004-02-10T13:39:55Z")
OK, I qualify this by admitting that 90% of my knowledge of Texas is based upon doing business in Houston, with the occasional trip to Austin, the Hill Country and Galvaston…but a couple of observations from a goddamn limey… 1. My ex-employer was bringing their US subsidiary back into the rest of the organisation. I was involved in the integration workshops. Rest of the worlds honest early feedback on the professionalism of our new-Texan co-workers? “Wouldn’t trust them to successfully post a letter.” 😉 Conclusion - not the sharpest pencils in the box, but incredibly polite even when mortally offended. 1. Strangers conversation overheard by an early arrival colleague at the bar when the rest of us Europeans walked into the pub in a bunch, “Waaadya reckon? Gay? Or just European?” 😃 Conclusion - Texan definition of fashionable dress is simply _this years_ Stetson, but pretty good sense of humour. At least I hope it was intended to be humourous 😕 Question - Total myths, or is there something in either (provisional) conclusion? ---
**Author:** ![Pabitel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbce88/32.png) [@Pabitel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pabitel)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/35 "2004-02-10T13:56:26Z")
I used to live in Wyoming. The “true” west. We had a little conversation starter for when we met Texans. Q: What’s the difference between a dead coyote and a dead Texan lying by the side of the highway? A: The skid marks leading up to the coyote. Out west, Texans are though of as a sort of crazy aunt at the best of times. You hear them talk about home and evey other word is a gripe about what a dusty, sweaty, boring, humorless place it is. Then they turn around and start telling you how you ought to move there cause it is so great. I think they are just trying to spread the misery. My sister lived there for quite a while and I visited several times. I never saw anything that made me want to come back. Nowhere in the world can you see so far and see so little. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/36 "2004-02-10T14:14:56Z")
And for every Texan who likes to brag that Texas was an independent republic at one time: 1. So were each and every one of the Thirteen Original Colonies. 2. So was California. 3. Hawaii was an independent kingdom. ---
**Author:** ![The\_General\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e8cbc/32.png) [@The\_General\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_General_1)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/37 "2004-02-10T14:52:06Z")
Yes, but none of them are capable of competing with the rest of the US in a global economy. In addition, Texas is bigger and wealthier than most European contries. Including England and France. Besides, California is run by people who have no idea what their doing. Gray Davis was directly responsoble for the blackouts when he froze the price that could be charged for power. New England buys our power, oil, and computers. Hawaii’s only major industry is tourism. On to the post by notquietkarpov. It’s not that people down here aren’t intellegent. It’s that we don’t act as professional as some people. We don’t really hurry (unless we’re driving). The problem is that Texans sort of expect people to act like Texans, and then are a little surprised when they don’t. Last point for this post: The area itself is uninviting (but then, it’s tyhe same for a lot of the states around us; even I thought that New Mexico was a wasteland), but the people are nice folks, the politics are a good blend of Conservative and Libertarian, and we’ll let you do pretty much whatever you want as long as you don’t mess with us, our beer, our dogs, or our religion. How 'bout _them_ apples? ---
**Author:** ![The\_General\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e8cbc/32.png) [@The\_General\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_General_1)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/38 "2004-02-10T14:58:47Z")
> [@angelicate](#): > > He seems like the type of Texan I haven’t missed since moving out of the state a few years ago. The mere fact that you moved out means that you were probably from out-of-state originally. Or you couldn’t cut it here, and chickened out. That reminds me. The phrase “couldn’t cut it” is from Texas. It refers to the Texas Rangers. Once upon a time, they had to make their own badge from a silver dollar. Using their teeth. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/39 "2004-02-10T15:00:59Z")
> [@caligynephobia](#): > > Ooh, please don’t lump John Wayne in with Texas. Ohio or California, maybe, but not Texas. Wasn’t The Duke a member of the Klan? I lived in Houston when I was a kid, and I vouch for the roaches. They’re about the size of a candy bar, and twice as sweet. ---
**Author:** ![The\_General\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e8cbc/32.png) [@The\_General\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_General_1)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2004, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353/40 "2004-02-10T15:01:21Z")
> [@vunderbob](#): > > Is it true that because of the overcrowded cemetaries, when a Texan dies, s/he is given an enema so they can be buried in a shoebox? Not true at all. There’s more than enough space here for everyone to be buried. After all, You could fit all of New England inside Texas, without cutting any states in half. Hell, there’s enough room for all of California to live here. We’d have to build more, but we could manage. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-myths-dispelled/228353.md?page=3)