# Texas Solves All Major Social Problems **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 4, 2005, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404 "2005-05-04T17:28:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/101 "2005-05-06T00:14:37Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > You’re a very informal sort of fellow, eh **Tuck**? Well, you know, if it’s all going to end up wadded on the floor anyway. . . ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/102 "2005-05-06T00:34:34Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > I take it you’d have been a big fan (HA!) of [Sally Rand?](http://www.loc.gov/exhibits/bobhope/images/vcvg2.jpg) Now that’s the sort of cite I was looking for. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/103 "2005-05-06T01:13:02Z")
Ha ha. Now it’s a flirt thread. Let it be known: Everyone flirting in this thread is a grade ‘A’ twat. Now who’s going to start the next hard hitting Pit thread about Hitler or Cancer. Boo to those two guys! ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/104 "2005-05-06T01:56:31Z")
Hmm, I want to spell out why **hill billy queen** is a twat: You agree that Bosda is a complete jackass but you feel the need to defend him here in the Pit. Why? Because at least he’s not a meanie like that Carnal was that one time. Find me one other time I was a bastard to anyone. Look long and hard you presumptious cunt. And Tuckerfan… about time you change your username to “MayIShowUMyPenis” it’ll save you from carpal tunnel. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/105 "2005-05-06T02:00:35Z")
Well in a better world I’d edit out my last insult to Hillbillyqueen, but it’s frigging done. I had worked myself into a bit of lather her brining that up. Still a twat though ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/106 "2005-05-06T02:10:45Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > And Tuckerfan… about time you change your username to “MayIShowUMyPenis” it’ll save you from carpal tunnel. Only if you change your username to “Im More Obsessed With Tuckerfans Penis Than He Is”. Or you just wanna slink off to deadjournal and slam me anonomously there? (I wouldn’t recommend that, however, since the best slams against me in those threads are the ones I posted.) ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/107 "2005-05-06T02:49:44Z")
I truly doubt it. Don’t think I’ve ever commented on your penis before and I still haven’t. I was commenting on your need for show & tell. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/108 "2005-05-06T03:14:53Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > I truly doubt it. > > Don’t think I’ve ever commented on your penis before and I still haven’t. I was commenting on your need for show & tell. I don’t have any “need” for show & tell. Frankly, I don’t much care if no one ever sees my dick again. I threw that out there because I thought it was funny. Hell, I’d completely forgotten that I even emailed nekkid pictures of myself (as a joke, mind you) to other Dopers, until I got an email from a Doper who’d discovered folks whinging about it off-board. Rather pathetic, really, IMHO, that people have nothing better to do than discuss my weiner and what I choose to do with it. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/109 "2005-05-06T03:23:48Z")
Yeah, ok. I’ve always enjoyed your posts on work, honestly. But any story where you’re the most normal one has got to be only “based on actual events”. BTW, why would you tell me to “slink off to DeadJournal”. I actually post there non-anonymously. Sometimes. 😛 There’s [codes on offer](http://www.deadjournal.com/users/anonpitmod/14511.html), go for it. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/110 "2005-05-06T03:42:51Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Yeah, ok. > > I’ve always enjoyed your posts on work, honestly. But any story where you’re the most normal one has got to be only “based on actual events”. You must have missed [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=315244) then. I’m honestly not bright enough to make that shit up. Wish I was, because I could no doubt put Stephen King, Michael Crichton, and damned near every other writer out of business. > [@](#): > > BTW, why would you tell me to “slink off to DeadJournal”. I actually post there non-anonymously. Sometimes. 😛 There’s [codes on offer](http://www.deadjournal.com/users/anonpitmod/14511.html), go for it. I waste too much time on the web as it is, anyway. I start spending my time at places like that, and I’ll never get anything done. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/111 "2005-05-06T03:52:38Z")
I thought you already posting all the clever bits about yourself there. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/112 "2005-05-06T06:46:01Z")
Wasn’t this a thread about the idiot lawmakers in Texas? Sometimes I think Texas must have improved in the forty years I’ve been away, but then I see that it hasn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/113 "2005-05-06T12:21:09Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Hmm, I want to spell out why **hill billy queen** is a twat: > > You agree that Bosda is a complete jackass but you feel the need to defend him here in the Pit. Why? Because at least he’s not a meanie like that Carnal was that one time. > > Find me one other time I was a bastard to anyone. Look long and hard you presumptious cunt. > And Tuckerfan… about time you change your username to “MayIShowUMyPenis” it’ll save you from carpal tunnel. You’re right, I was being presumptious. I don’t hang out in the pit. Infact, I rarely venture past MPSIMS and IMHO. So I’m not at all familiar with your other posts. And thank you **CarnalK**. I’ve been here 4 years, and I’ve only had nice thing said about me or completely overlooked. I would’ve prefered a pit thread all to myself. Maybe in another 4 years. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/114 "2005-05-06T12:24:24Z")
> [@](#): > > Hmm, I want to spell out why hill billy queen is a twat: > > You agree that Bosda is a complete jackass but you feel the need to defend him here in the Pit. Why? Because at least he’s not a meanie like that Carnal was that one time. Find me one other time I was a bastard to anyone. Look long and hard you presumptious cunt. And Tuckerfan… about time you change your username to “MayIShowUMyPenis” it’ll save you from carpal tunnel. > [@CarnalK](#): > > Well in a better world I’d edit out my last insult to Hillbillyqueen, but it’s frigging done. I had worked myself into a bit of lather her brining that up. > > Still a twat though You know, not all my posts are gems, but _that_ was lame & stupid. **CarnalK** , you are 10 lbs of wet crap crammed into a 5 lbs sack. You abuse the **queen** , condemn my posts, sigline, number of lashes in my left eyebrow, etc, & then post some of the most idiotic/vitriolic shit I’ve ever seen here. You have no class, no sense of humor, & no sense period. Why do you stay? Hint hint hint. :rolleyes: :wally ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/115 "2005-05-06T15:32:50Z")
All of you - can you please take this to one of the snark boards or something? This is not necessary. You’ve destroyed a perfectly good thread already, and all you’re doing is embarrassing yourselves further. It’s impossible to win this type of argument because every post just makes you guys look worse in the eyes of those watching. I have no doubt that you all know exactly where to find the snark boards. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/116 "2005-05-06T15:46:58Z")
Jeez **Excalibre** you’re so missing what’s happening. **Fear Itself** had his “nanny state” rant hijacked by people who can’t see the word “cheerleader” without pulling the old lech schtick. And when I help call someone on it Ms Nice tells me to leave the poor guy alone. Leading me to: Why the fuck should we have to go to Dead Journal to bitch at other Dopers? Isn’t that what we paid for the stinking BBQ Pit for? Or are you now arbitrating what makes a valid hijack? I had a longer post ready, but I don’t have time to edit it up. I’ll post it after work if it still seems useful. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/117 "2005-05-06T15:52:29Z")
Now, let’s see if we can [get this train back on the rails](http://community.lib.oh.us/Working_SCL/LOCAL_HISTORY/railroad/RR-Crane.jpg), shall we? I can’t help wondering, if male cheerleaders ([not that there are that many](http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.americancheerleader.com/images/10_03/guys4.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.americancheerleader.com/backissues/oct03/guything.php&h=267&w=169&sz=10&tbnid=KDSlrJChDlIJ:&tbnh=107&tbnw=68&hl=en&start=7&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmale%2Bcheerleader%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26c2coff%3D1%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26sa%3DN) ) dressed as skimpily and did dance routines as suggestive as the girls, would there be the same sort of righteous outrage from the bluenoses? ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/118 "2005-05-06T15:55:53Z")
And **Bosda** , trying to make me feel ostracized is goddamn petty. And ineffective when it comes from the village idiot. Mostly petty though. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/119 "2005-05-06T17:59:37Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > I can’t help wondering, if male cheerleaders ([not that there are that many](http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.americancheerleader.com/images/10_03/guys4.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.americancheerleader.com/backissues/oct03/guything.php&h=267&w=169&sz=10&tbnid=KDSlrJChDlIJ:&tbnh=107&tbnw=68&hl=en&start=7&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmale%2Bcheerleader%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26c2coff%3D1%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26sa%3DN) ) dressed as skimpily and did dance routines as suggestive as the girls, would there be the same sort of righteous outrage from the bluenoses? [Male cheerleaders have long history in the US](http://stopbush.textamerica.com/?r=1611473), and some find them offensive no matter what they wear. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404/120 "2005-05-06T18:34:22Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Why the fuck should we have to go to Dead Journal to bitch at other Dopers? Isn’t that what we paid for the stinking BBQ Pit for? Or are you now arbitrating what makes a valid hijack? I have no doubt that you already do quite frequently. If not, please start a pit thread on Bosda - obviously you’ll find a willing audience. Just don’t have your little snit in here. Christ, are you fucking five years old? > [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > I can’t help wondering, if male cheerleaders ([not that there are that many](http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.americancheerleader.com/images/10_03/guys4.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.americancheerleader.com/backissues/oct03/guything.php&h=267&w=169&sz=10&tbnid=KDSlrJChDlIJ:&tbnh=107&tbnw=68&hl=en&start=7&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmale%2Bcheerleader%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26c2coff%3D1%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26sa%3DN) ) dressed as skimpily and did dance routines as suggestive as the girls, would there be the same sort of righteous outrage from the bluenoses? Mmm, no argument against scantily-clad young men from me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/texas-solves-all-major-social-problems/302404.md?page=7)