# That CRAAAAAAAAZY conspiracy theory: the mass firings of US Attorneys **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 6, 2007, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824 "2007-03-06T17:45:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/81 "2007-03-13T16:13:30Z")
[QUOTE=Onomatopoeia] hahaha. This is all just too delish. Senator Leahy is “astonished” that someone practically everyone knows is a freaking lying weasel is, well, a freaking lying weasel, and has been since day one. [/QUOTE] Maybe he’s actually just astonished that they tried such a ballsy move when it was clear there would be major fallout if it got out. Kinda shows how confident they were they’d hold on in '06, eh? Just think, without a badly-planned occupation of Iraq they might have actually have held on to their “permanent majority”. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hentor_the_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/82 "2007-03-13T16:13:30Z")
[QUOTE=Onomatopoeia] hahaha. This is all just too delish. Senator Leahy is “astonished” that someone practically everyone knows is a freaking lying weasel is, well, a freaking lying weasel, and has been since day one. I’m smelling me some Gonzales meat on a spit …and is that a whiff Rove meat wafting through as well? Yummm. [/QUOTE] Me? I smell Bush. ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/83 "2007-03-13T17:54:52Z")
AG Gonzalez is haveing a [press conference](http://www.cnn.com/) at 2 p.m. Eastern. Should be very interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/84 "2007-03-13T18:38:05Z")
Let me guess…admitting little mistakes in hopes of mitigating the big ones. Two more press conferences and he’ll be close to giving up the ghost. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/85 "2007-03-13T18:57:03Z")
Evidently Sanders (who just resigned) is the new Scooter. It looks as if he will be the fall guy for Justice. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/86 "2007-03-13T19:15:13Z")
[As is so true to form](http://www.cnn.com/2007/POLITICS/03/13/fired.attorneys/index.html) > [@](#): > > WASHINGTON (CNN) – Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said Tuesday that “mistakes were made” regarding the firing of eight U.S. attorneys and he accepts responsibility for the ordeal. Oh, “mistakes were made,” were they? And you “accept responsibility” for the ordeal, do you, you freakin’ weasel-words using sack-o-crap? > [@](#): > > “My pledge to the American people is to find out what went wrong here,” he said. " What went wrong here? You went wrong, you lying freak! Who are you now, OJ? > [@](#): > > As we can all imagine, in an organization of 110,000 people, I am not aware of every bit of information that passes through the halls of justice, nor am I aware of all decisions." …except those for which you’re directly involved, right? RIGHT?? …or are you not aware of those either, you creep? ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/87 "2007-03-13T19:16:52Z")
“Mistakes were made…” What a stand-up guy! ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/88 "2007-03-13T19:24:26Z")
He looked like the living image of the Peter Principle. that was a tough one to watch. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/89 "2007-03-13T19:29:51Z")
[QUOTE=yanceylebeef] Evidently Sanders (who just resigned) is the new Scooter. It looks as if he will be the fall guy for Justice. [/QUOTE] I think you mean Kyle Sampson. But I don’t think anyone’s going to believe he came up with these lists, and turned them into actual firings and hirings, on his own authority. And he’s going to have to testify under oath about his dealings with Gonzales, Rove, Miers, etc. over this matter. Lots of good times ahead. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/90 "2007-03-13T19:33:33Z")
[QUOTE=Dinsdale] “Mistakes were made…” [/QUOTE] Gonzales didn’t talk to his own chief of staff, the guy who _did the firings_, before testifying under oath to congress? Even if anyone believes that, it’s a mistake that requires very little ‘getting to the bottom of’. It’s also not very forgivable in a guy who’s supposed to behave like some sort of legal professional. ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/91 "2007-03-13T19:34:01Z")
[QUOTE=RTFirefly] I think you mean Kyle Sampson. But I don’t think anyone’s going to believe he came up with these lists, and turned them into actual firings and hirings, on his own authority. And he’s going to have to testify under oath about his dealings with Gonzales, Rove, Miers, etc. over this matter. Lots of good times ahead. [/QUOTE] Damn. Sampson. I was thinking about chicken for lunch. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/92 "2007-03-13T19:37:37Z")
[QUOTE=RTFirefly] I think you mean Kyle Sampson. But I don’t think anyone’s going to believe he came up with these lists, and turned them into actual firings and hirings, on his own authority. And he’s going to have to testify under oath about his dealings with Gonzales, Rove, Miers, etc. over this matter. Lots of good times ahead. [/QUOTE] Being an underling in the Bush administration must totally kick ass. I mean, you get all the power of your superiors, but don’t have to answer to them! And they never check up on you! Dubya better look out or Tony Snow might just end up firing Cheney! -Joe ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/93 "2007-03-13T19:38:09Z")
More on [rewarding people with U.S. Attorney positions](http://time-blog.com/swampland/2007/03/prepare_to_withstand_political.html): > [@](#): > > I’m also intrigued by another connection: According to a NY Times profile of Sampson today, he was in competition himself for a U.S. Attorney post in Utah. The name of the guy who beat him out for the job might sound familiar. He was Brett Tolman–who, as I reported in Swampland last week, was the person that Arlen Specter fingered as the Justice Department official responsible for giving the Administration its expansive new power to end-run the Senate in appointing U.S. Attorneys. It was done under a provision, little-noticed at the time, that was inserted into legislation reauthorizing the Patriot Act. That provision now appears certain to be undone by Congress. Unbelievable. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/94 "2007-03-13T19:52:05Z")
[QUOTE=yanceylebeef] Damn. Sampson. I was thinking about chicken for lunch. [/QUOTE] Man, how can you think about chicken for lunch, when we’ve got Gonzales roasting on a spit? 😃 Yeah, I know - tastes like chicken. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/95 "2007-03-13T19:54:13Z")
[QUOTE=RTFirefly] Man, how can you think about chicken for lunch, when we’ve got Gonzales roasting on a spit? 😃 Yeah, I know - tastes like chicken. 🙂 [/QUOTE] That’s the thing…I didn’t want mexican for lunch. What? ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/96 "2007-03-13T19:55:37Z")
[`I acknowledge that mistakes were made here,'' Gonzales said. `I accept responsibility. I’ve overcome a lot of obstacles in my life to become attorney general. I am not here because I give up.‘’](http://http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=a2NzOfNjPULk&refer=home) In others words, “Nanny nanny boo boo”(_raspberry_, with lots of spit!!!). :mad: ---
**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/97 "2007-03-13T19:59:06Z")
So the President–whose goals and well-being have unquestionably been the single-minded focus of Al’s personal and professional life for the last 15 years–talks to Al in October about the soon-to-be-purged USAs’ unwillingness to play ball with the White House on its “voter fraud” complaints. But Al doesn’t remember the conversation. White House counsel Harriet Miers–whose personal and professional worship of George Bush is eerily similar to that of Al, who doesn’t take a coffee break without asking herself WWGWBD?–has her name and thumprints all over the lists of USAs’ proposed for purging. Al has no clue it’s happening. All those emails are going back and forth to Al’s chief of staff for many months. But Al’s never heard about any of it. Al’s going down for perjury and obstruction. Disgusting. And incredibly stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/98 "2007-03-13T19:59:19Z")
[QUOTE=ouryL] [`I acknowledge that mistakes were made here,'' Gonzales said. `I accept responsibility. I’ve overcome a lot of obstacles in my life to become attorney general. I am not here because I give up.‘’](http://http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=a2NzOfNjPULk&refer=home) [/QUOTE] “And by God, by the time 2008 rolls around a Democratic candidate won’t be able to so much as say ‘Nice day’ without one of our attorneys trying to find a way to use it against him” -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/99 "2007-03-13T20:05:25Z")
Aw, c’mon, guys, take it easy on ol’ Alberto. You act as if you expect the Attorney General to be above reproach, obeying the law and acting professionally, apolitically and capably. I think that’s damned unreasonable. Why hold him to a higher standard than the President does everyone else in his administration? Sheesh. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824/100 "2007-03-13T20:16:04Z")
[QUOTE=minty green] Al’s going down for perjury and obstruction. [/QUOTE] Really? He won’t be put out to pasture with a medal and a memoir deal like every other crook who gets bounced from this administration (with one recent exception)? I know the sleaze seems to be coming thick and fast, and it feels like every day brings a new scandal that makes us all pray, “Maybe _this_ is the one that will finally bring these fuckers down,” but come on: a personnel matter about the firing and hiring of U.S. attorneys? Do you think Joe Citizen has a _clue_ who these guys are or what they do, or why these revelations are important? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-craaaaaaaazy-conspiracy-theory-the-mass-firings-of-us-attorneys/394824.md?page=6)