# That is IT, fetch me a trebuchet! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 16, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876 "2003-09-16T02:47:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/1 "2003-09-16T02:47:29Z")
I have decided that laying siege to all in my path is my only possible option. I hereby command the SDMB wenches to fetch me a [trebuchet](http://www.trebuchet.com/) so that the wild debauchery and wholesale destruction may begin. Yarr. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/2 "2003-09-16T03:11:30Z")
I’ll help you build it. I always thought it would be a cool project. ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/3 "2003-09-16T03:19:02Z")
Excellent. First we will need whiskey, lots of it. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/4 "2003-09-16T03:22:02Z")
Can I ride in the bucket? I wanna ride in the bucket. ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/5 "2003-09-16T03:26:20Z")
only if you promise to be brave when you are smashed to itty bitty tibbily bits against the walls of the fortresses of my enemies, therefore ensuring our victory if only because they’ll have to spend a terrible amount on cleaning supplies afterwards. ---
**Author:** ![viking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@viking](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/viking)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/6 "2003-09-16T03:28:08Z")
Fetchez la vache! Fetchez la vache! ---
**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/7 "2003-09-16T03:28:39Z")
Second thought first… Yes! Whiskey! Lot’s of whiskey! Preferably Mr. Daniel’s fine mash! I am most pleasently reminded of the flying piano, from _Northern Exposure_! ---
**Author:** ![Inky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7feea3/32.png) [@Inky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inky_1)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/8 "2003-09-16T03:33:43Z")
Now, now AG. Sometimes life can be so rotten that it seems your only recourse is to release wanton destruction on all you survey using fourteenth-century technology. This to me seems is an unhealthy outlook. No, I think it’s much healthier to seek out a path of healing – fourteenth century healing, preferably involving the balancing of bodily humours using leeches or maybe drilling holes in you skull to release the evil goblins. ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/9 "2003-09-16T03:38:02Z")
Inky, you understand that I hold you in the highest respect and hope you take no offence when I say buggre alle that ande feyche me the trebuchet. Oooh, I bet a piano would make a terribly interesting noise against bricks. And I like my goblin just fine. His name is Mr. Daniels. He is my friend. ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/10 "2003-09-16T03:43:33Z")
I see “trebuchet” and immediately think of the **font**. SUCH a dork. Omigawrd. [But I fetched you one anyhow](http://www.myfonts.com/fonts/microsoft/trebuchet/ms-bold/). 😃 ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/11 "2003-09-16T03:48:43Z")
THAT IS NOT GOING TO MAKE A PLEASING SQUISHY CRUMBLE SOUND WHEN HURLED AGAINST A WALL AT GREAT SPEED, HAMA. Really, some people. ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/12 "2003-09-16T04:52:06Z")
A piano!?!?!?!? How dare you! This means war! ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/13 "2003-09-16T04:53:53Z")
Ok, I realize they aren’t extremely high on the lethal scale(and I’m not a SDMB wench), but I have been known to build something very much like [these](http://www.weirdrichard.com/trebuchet.htm) in the past. And I’ll probably do it again now that I have been reminded of what fun it is by this thread. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/14 "2003-09-16T05:05:40Z")
Now just calm down, **Eonwe**. How about a harpsichord? Or a spinet? ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/15 "2003-09-16T05:15:15Z")
Procure a few hundred over-ripe haggises, **andygirl** , and you will have more squishing than wine-makers of old (using their feet, natch) with their entire bodies covered in vaseline. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/16 "2003-09-16T05:15:28Z")
I’ll assist with the construction project, gladly. I’ve been a fan of the trebuchet ever since I saw one that an English fellow built. He tossed a small auto, and also a flaming piano. Always loved the episodes of Junkyard Wars featuring trebuchets. Then again, I enjoy the use of my homemade spud gun, so it’s a given that my bolts aren’t at factory specified torque. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/17 "2003-09-16T05:16:20Z")
I might point out that bagpipes make very cool noises when launched against a vertical brick emplacement. I clicked the link for [BackyardArtillery.com](http://BackyardArtillery.com) at the bottom of the page. Imagine my excitement when I saw that they offered a [Cat-A-Pult](http://www.backyardartillery.com/catapult/). Imagine my disappointment when I found out that it’s not for launching real cats. Still, the Quicktime video is fun to watch (favorite line = “And now it’s time to launch your cat!”). And mebbe with a little bit of reingineering… ---
**Author:** ![Pigs\_in\_Space](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9d8465/32.png) [@Pigs\_in\_Space](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pigs_in_Space)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/18 "2003-09-16T05:51:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by andygirl \* > \*\* > Oooh, I bet a piano would make a terribly interesting noise against bricks. \*\* Actually, the sound of a piano being dropped off a building onto a car is not nearly as impressive as one would expect. But then, that was an upright, and you, of course, would use at least a baby grand. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/19 "2003-09-16T06:40:45Z")
It didn’t make a resonant, Wile-Coyote-esque SPRYONGGG!!!? ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876/20 "2003-09-16T13:39:59Z")
Betcha there was no earth-shattering ‘kaboom’ either. 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-is-it-fetch-me-a-trebuchet/201876.md?page=2)