# That one roommate

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-one-roommate/823174>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [October 18, 2018, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-one-roommate/823174 "2018-10-18T21:21:30Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 2\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\
**Post date:** [October 20, 2018, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-one-roommate/823174/41 "2018-10-20T18:31:13Z")

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> [@brujaja](#):
>
> Well, he’s an ex. Who let me live with him when I didn’t have anywhere to go. When someone stands by me like that, I don’t forget.
> 
> I don’t mind sharing with the one guy, but he gets hella presumptuous. I would never have the inclination nor the nerve to be that way.

If your ex gets to live for free and have you cook for him, why would he ever leave? Yes, he did a big favor for you in the past, but how long can he get a free ride off of that? And his actions now are downright disrespectful and unacceptable for someone freeloading. It sounds like your big heart may actually be enabling him. Even if you care for him, be sure to push back when he acts like this. It will make him a better person. It’s good for him to learn how to behave like a responsible adult.

But just based on the living arrangement with all those people, it might make sense to come up with a system so people know which foods are reserved versus what’s available to take. Someone could very easily eat something as a snack that you need to use for dinner. A simple way could be to put rubber bands on things you don’t want people to eat. It makes it very clear what they should not touch and will help avoid these situations in the future.

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**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\
**Post date:** [October 20, 2018, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/that-one-roommate/823174/42 "2018-10-20T19:59:31Z")

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I’m a little sympathetic to the OP’s willingness to be chef for everyone, especially when one of the roommates is her son. (I enjoy cooking from scratch and love to have people to cook for.) But they all need to do something for her. If she does all the cooking, she should get a break on her share of the rent. Or if a financial arrangement doesn’t work, the roomies need to take out the trash, vacuum and dust, clean the fridge, do the dishes, etc.

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