# That's It We Obviously Need to Fuck More. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 30, 2006, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814 "2006-06-30T23:47:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/21 "2006-07-01T02:28:00Z")
> [@Thudlow Boink](#): > > Since you brought it up, you’re in charge of pairing up all the single Dopers so we can all do our part. **PAIRS?** This is no time for your petty bourgeois restrictions! Don’t you see there is a CRISIS brewing? Don’t you oppress me–mate! 😃 **LOUNE:** That would be 5,271,009–why, you wanna do some queue jumping? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/22 "2006-07-01T02:44:36Z")
> [@Thudlow Boink](#): > > Since you brought it up, you’re in charge of pairing up all the single Dopers so we can all do our part. > Or are we including the kind of sex where a partner isn’t necessary? Meh. We can do that anyways. Partners are necessary. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/23 "2006-07-01T02:50:04Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > **PAIRS?** This is no time for your petty bourgeois restrictions! Don’t you see there is a CRISIS brewing? Don’t you oppress me–mate! > > 😃 > > **LOUNE:** That would be 5,271,009–why, you wanna do some queue jumping? 😉 An attitude like that will get you far in life…or the line. Either way, your life consists of this line, baby. Pull a Beetlejuice, trick the lady with the shrunken head into taking her number and grab a few of your sluttiest friends. Clear your calendar, woman. I’m going to take a few of you on and consolidate this endeavor for our country. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/24 "2006-07-01T02:51:34Z")
OK-I’m game. But there are conditions attached. 1. you need to know my name and use it–no calling me Brenda or whoever. 2. please bring your own protection. 3. Take a shower and brush your teeth–or at least have done so on regular basis. 4. Kiss me–nicely. Several times–think of it as “priming the pump.” Use a baseball metaphor, if that makes you more comfortable. 5. see the other sex thread–ie, don’t leave money on my nightstand. No, really, don’t. 6. Don’t take a cell phone call during sex–it’s quite offputting. Ok–who wants to ya know? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/25 "2006-07-01T02:55:14Z")
> [@Least Original User Name Ever](#): > > An attitude like that will get you far in life…or the line. Either way, your life consists of this line, baby. > > Pull a Beetlejuice, trick the lady with the shrunken head into taking her number and grab a few of your sluttiest friends. > > Clear your calendar, woman. I’m going to take a few of you on and consolidate this endeavor for our country. I’m not one to cavil when our national reputation is on the line, but I’m damned if I’m pulling anybody’s beetlejuice, thankyouverymuch! A girl has to have some standards, you know… Fair’s fair there, m’man–you bringing your rugby team along? Heck, if we time it right we could bump the US up a few notches before The Daily Show… Oh, and bring ice cream… lots of ice cream… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/26 "2006-07-01T02:57:27Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > OK-I’m game. But there are conditions attached. > > 1. you need to know my name and use it–no calling me Brenda or whoever. > > 2. please bring your own protection. > > 3. Take a shower and brush your teeth–or at least have done so on regular basis. > > 4. Kiss me–nicely. Several times–think of it as “priming the pump.” Use a baseball metaphor, if that makes you more comfortable. > > 5. see the other sex thread–ie, don’t leave money on my nightstand. No, really, don’t. > > 6. Don’t take a cell phone call during sex–it’s quite offputting. > Ok–who wants to ya know? > > 😉 _cracks knuckles_ It’s go time! Into “Pleasure Chamber #69”! ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/27 "2006-07-01T02:59:02Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > I’m not one to cavil when our national reputation is on the line, but I’m damned if I’m pulling anybody’s beetlejuice, thankyouverymuch! A girl has to have some standards, you know… > > Fair’s fair there, m’man–you bringing your rugby team along? Heck, if we time it right we could bump the US up a few notches before The Daily Show… > > Oh, and bring ice cream… lots of ice cream… 😃 You need no rugby team. I’m a one man scrum. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/28 "2006-07-01T03:06:41Z")
As an aside, why are all the Google ads for various types of tea? “Drink this tea” “Drink that tea” “Drink MORE tea” “Please, for the love of Og, talk about anything else–how about TEA?!” ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/29 "2006-07-01T03:08:42Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > As an aside, why are all the Google ads for various types of tea? “Drink this tea” “Drink that tea” “Drink MORE tea” “Please, for the love of Og, talk about anything else–how about TEA?!” We’re sponsored. How else do you want to get your fluids back, yet get a healthy dose of caffiene to stay up for a marathon romp? ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/30 "2006-07-01T03:09:47Z")
Oh, by the way…there’s a difference between ads for tea…and ads for “teabags”. ---
**Author:** ![TwoOnSunday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/22d042/32.png) [@TwoOnSunday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwoOnSunday)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/31 "2006-07-01T04:14:25Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > 1. Don’t take a cell phone call during sex–it’s quite offputting. See, I consider someone taking a call before or during the act a challenge. I don’t lose. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/32 "2006-07-01T04:53:43Z")
We got beat by the _British_? Oh, terrible shame. ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/33 "2006-07-01T04:55:11Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > 1. Don’t take a cell phone call during sex–it’s quite offputting. Strategically placed, and on vibrate, you might _want_ that phone to ring. ---
**Author:** ![orangeroughyisnotfishytasting](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@orangeroughyisnotfishytasting](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/orangeroughyisnotfishytasting)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/34 "2006-07-01T05:09:27Z")
boobs are not required for you know what but you know what is…it can still feel good no matter what the boob size…so I say go out and do it! America is losing it’s grip at least we can fight this war! ---
**Author:** ![orangeroughyisnotfishytasting](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@orangeroughyisnotfishytasting](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/orangeroughyisnotfishytasting)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/35 "2006-07-01T05:10:37Z")
This is like learning a Microsoft program ☹ but I’m dub. I mean dumb ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/36 "2006-07-01T05:38:23Z")
and factored in everything: menstrual cycles, arguments, illnesses, business travel, etc… And… my wife [of almost 27 years] and I are _STILL_ out boinking the entire world? **ROCK-&-FUCKING ROLL!!!** 🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒 Now I have an even better line for the **RARE** times she’s not in the mood: “Honey, you don’t want those French bastards winning, do you?” ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/37 "2006-07-01T06:37:00Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > We got beat by the _British_? > > Oh, terrible shame. Aint life a bitch??? \*holds head up proudly and sings “Rule Brittania” ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/38 "2006-07-01T06:47:30Z")
> [@Antigen](#): > > I kid, I kid, I’m a Frenchie (Canadian) myself… Do you realize we’re _twentieth_? We must get out more for the good of our country! All you Toronto Dopers, who’s with me? ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/39 "2006-07-01T07:35:10Z")
Whether or not _we_ as a nation need to fuck more, I can tell you for damn sure _I_ need to fuck more. Does **eleanorigby** have a slot open…uh, you know what I mean…stop sniggering dammit…sometime Sunday afternoon? Also, I’m concerned **Larry Mudd** may actually be sniffing a [dog’s paw.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=6845827&postcount=6) I think the partners have to be human. ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2006, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814/40 "2006-07-01T14:08:26Z")
> [@chowder](#): > > \*holds head up proudly and sings “Rule Brittania” Joins in. Gotta love Britain. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thats-it-we-obviously-need-to-fuck-more/362814.md?page=3)