# The 52 Funniest Things about the Upcoming Death of the Pope... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 4, 2005, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893 "2005-03-04T14:10:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2005, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/61 "2005-04-02T20:52:49Z")
Michael Jackson’s too broke to hope to buy the straight lycanthrope pope dope on a rope, copping a grope’s bones? Nope. Are we on a slippery slope, headed straight to hell? Peace, mangeorge ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2005, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/62 "2005-04-03T00:14:42Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > the best idea they’ll be able to come up with is to hit him on the head with a hammer - it sounds like a Monty Python sketch. Reminded me more of Star Trek, where a dead Klingon is jabbed with their equivalent of cattle prods to make sure they’re actually dead. Do they still make the Pope sit on the chair with a hole in the bottom to check if he really is a he? 😕 And I couldn’t get that link to work but some of the posted jokes lack humour and good taste. ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2005, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/63 "2005-04-03T02:58:38Z")
> [@SiouxChief](#): > > I’m Catholic, and was trying to show reverence at the exhibit, but one thing in the exhibit that made me laugh out loud was the “papal death hammer”. It’s a silver hammer that hit the pope with when they think he’s dead. The idea seemed absurd to me, but apparently was long-standing tradition until 1903. [Cite](http://www.americamagazine.org/papaltransition.cfm) (See the section, “What happens when the pope dies?”) From the cited site: One colleague remembers a picture in Life magazine (which I have not had time to look for) in 1958 showing Cardinal Tisserant, then Dean of the College of Cardinals, striking the dead Pope on the forehead and asking, three times, “Eugenio, are you dead?” after each stroke, before saying: “I declare that His Holiness Pope Pius XII is truly dead”. Quote from the diminutive Cardinal Munchkin (AKA “The Coroner”): “And he’s not only meeeerly dead, he’s really most sinceeeeeerly dead.” ---
**Author:** ![Hamish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a5b964/32.png) [@Hamish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamish)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2005, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/64 "2005-04-03T12:48:38Z")
> [@Pushkin](#): > > And I couldn’t get that link to work but some of the posted jokes lack humour and good taste. I agree. In the future, when I click on a thread promising jokes about the death of the pope, I expect everything will be in impeccable taste. What happened to the pure, innocent pope-death jokes that used to bring smiles to our faces while watching _Leave it to Beaver_ and _Father Knows Best_? Where are the pope-death jokes that I can tell my elderly grandmother without offending her? The world is changing too fast, I tell you. ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2005, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/65 "2005-04-03T17:01:32Z")
> [@Hamish](#): > > I agree. In the future, when I click on a thread promising jokes about the death of the pope, I expect everything will be in impeccable taste lol, I didn’t mean that far, some just seemed nasty for the sake of being nasty, not humourous 😛 ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2005, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/66 "2005-04-03T22:56:30Z")
If on the third day he rose from the dead, would he be charged for blasphemy? ---
**Author:** ![zetafunction](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/57b2e6/32.png) [@zetafunction](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zetafunction)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2005, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/67 "2005-04-03T23:02:08Z")
It’s supposed to be shock humor. If you didn’t find it funny, you’re probably too sensitive. ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/68 "2005-04-04T00:30:41Z")
> [@Pushkin](#): > > Reminded me more of Star Trek, where a dead Klingon is jabbed with their equivalent of cattle prods to make sure they’re actually dead. > > Do they still make the Pope sit on the chair with a hole in the bottom to check if he really is a he? 😕 > And I couldn’t get that link to work but some of the posted jokes lack humour and good taste. I’ve heard the “chair” story too. I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if it were true. Does anybody have the Straight Dope? Should I search? Unhhh! I don’t wanna. ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/69 "2005-04-04T08:26:25Z")
> [@zetafunction](#): > > It’s supposed to be shock humor. If you didn’t find it funny, you’re probably too sensitive. Or maybe its just not funny 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![AngelicGemma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/439d5e/32.png) [@AngelicGemma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngelicGemma)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/70 "2005-04-04T12:03:19Z")
> [@Pushkin](#): > > Or maybe its just not funny 🙂 I was thinking the same thing. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![mrklutz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ebca7d/32.png) [@mrklutz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrklutz)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/71 "2005-04-04T14:25:54Z")
> [@zetafunction](#): > > It’s supposed to be shock humor. If you didn’t find it funny, you’re probably too sensitive. The biggest problem with most shock humor is that the writer remembers to include the shock part, but not the humor part. Shock in and of itself? Meh. ---
**Author:** ![Steel\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/72 "2005-04-04T15:28:16Z")
> [@ccwaterback](#): > > If on the third day he rose from the dead, would he be charged for blasphemy? ROTFL, more likely they’d begin an exorcism. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![deadeyesdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@deadeyesdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deadeyesdad)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/73 "2005-04-04T17:59:53Z")
The divorced future King of England postpones his remarriage to attend the Pope’s funeral. ---
**Author:** ![av8rmike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/edb3f5/32.png) [@av8rmike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/av8rmike)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2005, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/74 "2005-04-04T19:41:59Z")
[Snopes weighs in](http://www.snopes.com/religion/hammer.asp) on the silver hammer bit. Unfortunately, they don’t seem to know any more than us Teeming Millions. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/75 "2005-04-09T14:35:26Z")
As a non-Catholic there is one thing I do not get. I keep seeing and hearing about Cardinals. What exactly makes St Louis so important to the religion? ---
**Author:** ![Balle\_M](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/13edae/32.png) [@Balle\_M](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balle_M)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/76 "2005-04-09T15:07:29Z")
> [@vetbridge](#): > > As a non-Catholic there is one thing I do not get. I keep seeing and hearing about Cardinals. What exactly makes St Louis so important to the religion? I know you’re just trying to be funny, but this is the type of ingnorance that we’re trying to fight here, not encourage. It’s the \*Arizona \* Cardinals. ---
**Author:** ![Balle\_M](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/13edae/32.png) [@Balle\_M](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balle_M)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/77 "2005-04-09T15:18:08Z")
> [@Tenar](#): > > From the cited site: > > One colleague remembers a picture in Life magazine (which I have not had time to look for) in 1958 showing Cardinal Tisserant, then Dean of the College of Cardinals, striking the dead Pope on the forehead and asking, three times, “Eugenio, are you dead?” after each stroke, before saying: “I declare that His Holiness Pope Pius XII is truly dead”. “But I’m _not_ dead…” “Shut up. You’re not fooling anyone.” ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/78 "2005-04-09T15:29:20Z")
> [@Balle\_M](#): > > It’s the \*Arizona \* Cardinals. Oooops. I should have known that. I love watching them play the LA Rams. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/79 "2005-04-09T15:57:37Z")
> [@Casey1505](#): > > And if he was blessing an attractive woman’s chest, would he be straight lycanthrope pope dope on a rope, copping a grope? Whilst on a cruise around Cape Hope as a way to cope? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2005, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893/80 "2005-04-09T16:54:22Z")
We here at the Dope can hope. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-52-funniest-things-about-the-upcoming-death-of-the-pope/292893.md?page=5)