# The Absolute Worst Christmas Song, Bar None **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 26, 2020, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972 "2020-12-26T17:16:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2021, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/122 "2021-01-03T22:38:26Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Then who was it that told him to come along to the gift-giving party? The angels? The shepherds: > [@](#): > > So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. 17 When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18 and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. Yes, I know that traditionally, the shepherds were Christmas Eve and the Wise Men were the Epiphany, but there’s some wiggle room there. 😀 ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2021, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/123 "2021-01-03T23:15:05Z")
There’s an awful lot of reaching speculation about a mid-20th-Century silly little Christmas carol… ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2021, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/124 "2021-01-03T23:50:52Z")
Like I said, fanwanking. We’re having a good time! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2021, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/125 "2021-01-04T01:56:49Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > > [@kaylasdad99](#): > > > > Then who was it that told him to come along to the gift-giving party? The angels? > > The shepherds: > > > [@](#): > > > > So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. 17 When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18 and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. > > Yes, I know that traditionally, the shepherds were Christmas Eve and the Wise Men were the Epiphany, but there’s some wiggle room there. 😀 Makes you wonder what were the finest gifts the shepherds had to bring that were fit to give a king. A genuine fleece blanket? ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2021, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/126 "2021-01-04T03:46:01Z")
Lamb chops. Rare, with mint jelly. Fit for Jehovah. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2021, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/127 "2021-01-04T04:23:26Z")
Fetal lamb chops, I imagine, if it really was in the bleak midwinter, like the songs say. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2021, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/128 "2021-01-04T15:44:35Z")
I had never heard the Kenny Rogers thing (and refused to listen past the first few seconds). But thanks to the OP, I now know to evacuate the premises when those first few minor chords impinge on my brain. As for a Connie Francis Xmas song, no way will I risk it.\* \*when I Googled Connie Francis just now, up popped a site with this revelation: “Connie may have died on October 10th, 2020 and her death was due to issues with her her old age.” Glad we cleared _that_ up, but according to Wikipedia she seems to still be alive. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2021, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/129 "2021-01-04T15:59:44Z")
It was Israel. “Bleak” midwinter just means it rains more than in the summer. Maybe they brought him some galoshes, or an umbrella. I spent Christmas of 2018 in Israel. It was 70°F. BTW, best Christmas EVER. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2021, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/130 "2021-01-04T16:01:20Z")
My son’s birthday is Oct. 10, a distinction he shares with none other than Ed Wood. ---
**Author:** ![am77494](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d2c977/32.png) [@am77494](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/am77494)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2021, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/131 "2021-01-05T18:01:05Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > What are the origins of Diwali? Is it a Hindi festival that was kind of pasted over older celebrations, or was it created out of whole cloth? Probably a bit of both. Also btw Hindi is a language spoken in some parts of India. Hindu refers to the people of India who loosely translated follow the Hindu religion. Not all Hindus celebrate Diwali. For example the Hindus of Bengal celebrate a different festival usually on the same day. Also, as a person bought up in Hinduism, I have no problem with celebrating Christmas and I have many friends who do too. My personal take is : A Hindu travelled all the way from India to Bethlehem to greet and welcome baby Jesus. If a Hindu can celebrate 2000 years back, there’s no reason for me to object. All Nativity scenes depict a Hindu, a Parsee and an African religion I don’t know. So Christmas does have inclusivity, they just don’t know it. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2021, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/132 "2021-01-05T18:40:56Z")
> [@am77494](#): > > All Nativity scenes depict a Hindu, a Parsee and an African religion I don’t know. So Christmas does have inclusivity, they just don’t know it. Well, Christianity is, to put it mildly, a flea under the corset of Judaism. It simply co-exists with other faiths. So anyone else can share and “play” with Christianity, and there’s no meaning other than what you make it, but for a Jew, it’s loaded with baggage. I’m trying to think of an analogy, and I can’t. I realize that for a lot of Americans, Christmas just _is_, and they don’t get how much of their day is Christmassy from Mid-November until the first week of January or so. ---
**Author:** ![am77494](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d2c977/32.png) [@am77494](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/am77494)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2021, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/133 "2021-01-05T19:09:54Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > Well, Christianity is, to put it mildly, a flea under the corset of Judaism I do not subscribe to that viewpoint although I certainly respect your right to your opinion. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2021, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/134 "2021-12-26T04:27:25Z")
We have a very Xian friend who played for us “Christmas Shoes” She claimed none of us would know it but I said, I’ve heard it. I didn’t mention I knew it because of Patton Oswalt’s bit on it. Yes, she cried while singing the song because of how “beautiful” it is. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2021, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/135 "2021-12-26T07:36:37Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Anyway, we all know the worst is _‘Christmas Shoes’._ This. ---
**Author:** ![Mk\_VII](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Mk\_VII](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mk_VII)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2021, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/136 "2021-12-26T17:00:21Z")
‘Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas’ is the worst for me. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2021, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/137 "2021-12-27T10:01:24Z")
You realize that it’s _supposed_ to be a sad, bitter, depressing song, right? > **[One of the most famous Christmas songs ever is actually a real downer](https://www.avclub.com/one-of-the-most-famous-christmas-songs-ever-is-actually-1798274827)** > > “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas,” one of the most frequently played holiday songs, is both somber and beautiful ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2021, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/138 "2021-12-27T13:39:51Z")
I’m going to write a Christmas song from the point of view of Mary’s flabbergasted gynecologist. ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2021, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/139 "2021-12-27T15:40:13Z")
Pretty sure they didn’t have gynos then ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2021, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/140 "2021-12-27T15:43:58Z")
The intent would be more towards humor than historical accuracy. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanubv.2/32/3260_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUBv.2)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2021, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972/141 "2021-12-27T15:56:44Z")
I’m sure I’ve expressed my abject hatred of that goddamn hippopotamus song but I don’t see it so it must have been another thread. Yes, you little twat, you absolutely can have a hippopotamus, but you’ll have to get yourself to the river to get him. Go ahead, just wade right in and wait for him to come to you . . . [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/OjPm0o04lGE/maxresdefault.jpg "Gayla Peevey - I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas (Hippo the Hero) (Audio)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjPm0o04lGE) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-absolute-worst-christmas-song-bar-none/928972.md?page=8)