# The Alphabetical Insult Game **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 9, 2016, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606 "2016-02-09T08:47:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/1 "2016-02-09T08:47:32Z")
In the original _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles_ movie, while fixing up the truck, Donatello and Casey Jones have a conversation in which they exchange third-grade, PG-rated insults alphabetically. “Here goes, gak face!” “I’m ready, hose brain!” So I thought we might do that here in this thread. **No** profanity allowed, and the cheesier, the better. The insult must be part of a sentence; you can’t just begin and end with it. And the insult is directed at the next person to post. So can it, alligator lips! ---
**Author:** ![Thin\_Ice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@Thin\_Ice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thin_Ice)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/2 "2016-02-09T12:44:50Z")
I can smell you over my shoulder, butt breath, so back off. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/3 "2016-02-09T12:46:41Z")
Put it where the sun don’t shine, you hackneyed fartblossom! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/4 "2016-02-09T13:39:06Z")
[Gack! I missed out on the alphabetical thing… cancel the last.] Put it where the sun don’t shine, chicken spit! ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/5 "2016-02-09T19:52:01Z")
You’re so dense they should name a kilogram cake after you. It’s 2.54 times denser than pound cake… ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/6 "2016-02-09T22:06:47Z")
You effete impudent snob. That’s right. I went Full Agnew. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/7 "2016-02-09T22:22:58Z")
I fart in your general direction, you foul-smelling feline fluffer! ---
**Author:** ![mascaroni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@mascaroni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mascaroni)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/8 "2016-02-09T23:45:29Z")
You guttersnipe. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2016, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/9 "2016-02-09T23:49:28Z")
You, sirrah, are a havering, hebetudinous humgruffin. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2016, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/10 "2016-02-10T00:24:18Z")
Get to steppin, you ignorant iguana! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2016, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/11 "2016-02-10T00:28:53Z")
You jiggling-jowled Jabberwocky, just wait 'til I get my hands on you! ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2016, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/12 "2016-02-10T00:47:01Z")
Kiss off, kid. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/13 "2016-02-11T06:29:51Z")
Oh, go lick a lascivious lemur’s liver, you Lilliputian-looking leper. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/14 "2016-02-11T13:57:58Z")
**Moderating** Multiple **WARNINGS** for personal insults. That’s a ban for you, and a ban for you, and a ban for you… ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/15 "2016-02-11T14:13:36Z")
Fah! Go maunder your mendacities, you morological mammothept! ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/16 "2016-02-11T14:18:11Z")
Nertz! ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/17 "2016-02-11T14:20:50Z")
At least I’m not an obstreperous octopode, unlike some people I could name! ---
**Author:** ![Thin\_Ice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@Thin\_Ice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thin_Ice)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/18 "2016-02-11T15:55:24Z")
Pipe down you pustulent prevaricator. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/19 "2016-02-11T16:33:02Z")
Quiet, quavering quisling! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2016, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606/20 "2016-02-11T17:16:51Z")
Enough of your rannygazoo, you rhypophagous rhetoricaster! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-alphabetical-insult-game/745606.md?page=2)