# The apocalypse is now **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 18, 2003, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862 "2003-12-18T22:33:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![cainxinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@cainxinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cainxinth)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/1 "2003-12-18T22:33:12Z")
It’s as good a time as any… ---
**Author:** ![Optihut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/edb3f5/32.png) [@Optihut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Optihut)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/2 "2003-12-18T22:40:49Z")
I say thee nay! ---
**Author:** ![lightingtool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/57b2e6/32.png) [@lightingtool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lightingtool)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/3 "2003-12-18T23:13:23Z")
Nope, sorry. How 'bout next Tuesday? ---
**Author:** ![Flander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8c91f0/32.png) [@Flander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flander)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/4 "2003-12-18T23:18:09Z")
I have a show next Tuesday…can you make it after Christmas? Or wait, after New Year’s, I wanna get plastered one more time before the end of the world!!! ---
**Author:** ![Darkhold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@Darkhold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darkhold)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/5 "2003-12-18T23:19:50Z")
Not until I see Return of the King. Read the Next George RR Martin book. Make love to a beautiful girl by candlelight. (that last one should keep the ending at bay for a long long time) ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/6 "2003-12-19T00:09:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darkhold \* > \*\*Not until I see Return of the King. > > Read the Next George RR Martin book. > > Make love to a beautiful girl by candlelight. (that last one should keep the ending at bay for a long long time) \*\* Or perhaps all three at the same time? ---
**Author:** ![zephyrine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/35a633/32.png) [@zephyrine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zephyrine)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/7 "2003-12-19T00:19:23Z")
If he’s reading a book and watching a movie while making love to a beautiful girl, I can guarantee it’ll be the last time he gets to do any of them, because if she has any sense she’ll set light to him with the candles… … pretty apocalyptic if it’s at the right moment, I guess! ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/8 "2003-12-19T00:23:04Z")
What, now? Ok, just lemme wash my teeth and I’ll be right out. ---
**Author:** ![Yumanite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b487fb/32.png) [@Yumanite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yumanite)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/9 "2003-12-19T00:29:55Z")
So, can I have your car? Oh, wait – I thought it was the rapture. ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/10 "2003-12-19T00:45:46Z")
I thought it smelled like napalm this morning. Could you wait until I get my plasma TV? I wanna watch the world end in crispy clear resolution. ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/11 "2003-12-19T02:19:50Z")
[Peter Cook ON] Hmmm. It was GMT, wasn’t it? Well, it’s not been quite the conflagration we’d been banking on. Right, never mind lads - same time tomorrow. [/Peter Cook] ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/12 "2003-12-19T04:26:51Z")
It’s not the apocalypse, I have yet to have sex with anyone. ---
**Author:** ![DreadCthulhu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/db5fbb/32.png) [@DreadCthulhu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DreadCthulhu)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/13 "2003-12-19T04:27:08Z")
The Stars Are Right. The Stars Are Right. \* The Stars Are Right!\* ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/14 "2003-12-19T04:45:21Z")
Oh shit! The Elder one is coming out!!! It really is the apocalypse ---
**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/15 "2003-12-19T04:51:07Z")
Eat me first please! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/16 "2003-12-19T05:16:36Z")
Sweet, that means I don’t have to go to work tomorrow. I’m sleeping in. ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/17 "2003-12-19T05:27:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ale \* > \*\*Eat me first please! 😃 \*\* And then me! And then the spankings will begin! I’ve been a naughty, evil grail-shaped-window-illuminating Zoot! ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Zero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@Saint\_Zero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Zero)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/18 "2003-12-19T05:32:17Z")
Wait, hold on. The Cubs have to win the world series. I have to buy a brand new car. Then I have to buy a brand new computer, with a CPU that’s less than a year old, at the most. So we’re _far, far_ away… ---
**Author:** ![Grimace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3e96dc/32.png) [@Grimace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grimace)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/19 "2003-12-19T05:35:33Z")
I’m sorry, I never got that memo about the Apocalypse. _shuffles through papers_ Yup, I have the memo for armageddon, and for hell freezing over, and for pigs flying, but I sure don’t see the Apocalypse memo. I’m sorry, but you’re just going to have to reschedule, because I just don’t have my lawn chair and kegger to enjoy it. ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2003, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862/20 "2003-12-19T05:41:40Z")
People, let’s get organized! We can’t have apocalypse more than once so we gotta agree on the time and place. So please, does anyone have anything to do on the 1st of April, 2004? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-apocalypse-is-now/219862.md?page=2)