# The Arizona "audit" **URL:** \ **Category:** Politics & Elections\ **Created:** [August 20, 2021, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239 "2021-08-20T21:16:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2021, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/41 "2021-09-16T19:47:42Z")
I wouldn’t be surprised if the “ninjas” flee to a country with no extradition treaty to spend their ill-gotten gains. ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2021, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/42 "2021-09-16T20:06:01Z")
Or, being ninjas, they’ll just … disappear. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2021, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/43 "2021-09-16T21:54:10Z")
I’m sure their ninja skills are equivalent to… [![](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/81/88/6f/81886fe7039c1366f7738c8fd93e5b42.jpg) ](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/81/88/6f/81886fe7039c1366f7738c8fd93e5b42.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Temporary\_Name](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@Temporary\_Name](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Temporary_Name)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2021, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/44 "2021-09-16T22:15:11Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Hmmm 🤔 Is it an attitude or is it a challenge? 🤨 It has become a challenge for them in Idaho as ventilators are in relatively short supply compared to demand. When I witnessed T\*\*\*\*'s own supporters boo him when he suggested getting the vaccine it became more than an attitude for me personally, it became a deeply held conviction. No, wait that isn’t quite right- it is more like an often proven theorem. More directly to your point however, just this morning I sent a link to the Idaho article to two long-term friends with the subject line: “Is This Really How Stubborn You Intend To Be?” Yes, I routinely challenge those with whom I interact to accept reality. Not having a ton of effect so far. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/45 "2021-09-17T17:21:16Z")
Apparently the audit will need an audit because large, surly, fire-stomping African animals interfered. Stupid rinos. > **[The top funder of Arizona's 2020 election 'audit' is signaling a new report...](https://www.rawstory.com/arizona-audit-results-2655055484/)** > > The team of Arizona Republican state senators, legislative staff, and advisers finalizing the Cyber Ninjas' report on the 2020 presidential election in Maricopa County are preparing to say that Joe Biden legitimately won the election, according to... ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/46 "2021-09-17T17:37:57Z")
Story should read: “The team of Arizona Republican state senators, legislative staff, and advisers finalizing the Cyber Ninjas’ report on the 2020 presidential election in Maricopa County…” who arrived here in a clown car… ---
**Author:** ![Temporary\_Name](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@Temporary\_Name](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Temporary_Name)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/47 "2021-09-17T17:41:03Z")
So now the shoe is on the other foot?? For quite some time the left has been saying you cannot trust this audit, their methods and loyalties are suspect. But now that the report is (nominally) forthcoming, the RIGHT is saying to disregard the results because all of those REPUBLICANS conducting the investigation are corrupt RINO’s?? This whole business is an absurdist novel, it is beyond surrealism. This episode of Arizona politics makes Kafka look like a simple summer beach read. ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/48 "2021-09-17T17:43:56Z")
From the linked article > Sources in Arizona have said that the state Senate review team was spooked by the [possible losses](https://storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.uscourts.mied.350905/gov.uscourts.mied.350905.172.0_3.pdf) of law licenses looming over Trump’s attorneys, as well as stern [warnings](https://www.democracydocket.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/doj-letter-to-fann-5-5-21.pdf) from the U.S. Department of Justice for possibly using investigative methods that could violate voter intimidation laws. As a result, they have been editing the report drafted by the Senate’s lead contractor, Cyber Ninjas, and excising claims and narratives that are speculative rather than factual. This has delayed the report’s release until the week of September 20, sources indicated. Sounds like maybe lying is starting to have consequences. 'Bout fucking time. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/49 "2021-09-17T17:53:43Z")
Good! ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/50 "2021-09-17T18:17:49Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Stupid rinos. That amuses me. They are openly admitting that you aren’t a **real** Republican unless you are willing to completely ignore reality. If you are presented with hard, tangible proof and allow that to interfere with your beliefs then you aren’t really a Republican. ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/51 "2021-09-17T19:36:52Z")
That has always been the most unbelievable aspect of the whole stolen election conspiracy. In order for it to have transpired, you would not only have had to have a vast conspiracy of Democrats importing Bamboo ballots from China, but also hoards of Republicans, (from the party appointed poll watchers to the secretaries of state to the Trump appointed judges), none of whom expressed any inkling of being a never-Trumper but who decided en mass on election day that they not only didn’t approve of their party’s candidate but that they will willing to commit fraud and risk jail time to keep him out of office, and do so without one defector blowing the whistle on the whole thing. As a general rule of thumb, if the vast majority of the public has to be in on the conspiracy for it to work, its not much of a conspiracy. With one real world exception: The conspiracy to convince children that Santa Claus exists ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/52 "2021-09-17T19:40:08Z")
You missed one piece of the puzzle that makes the whole thing possible. Antifa. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/53 "2021-09-17T19:48:42Z")
> [@bobot](#): > > Antifa. Those balaclava-clad sorcerers are capable of **anything**. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/54 "2021-09-17T19:51:38Z")
Even the Illuminati are afraid of those guys. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2021, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/55 "2021-09-17T23:30:43Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > hoards of Republicans Sorry, but this amuses me. Why would anyone collect Republicans? Oh, and it just came to me: _RINO_ must mean _Reality Is Not Occurring_. Those clowns are that far over the edge. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2021, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/56 "2021-09-18T02:34:23Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > As a general rule of thumb, if the vast majority of the public has to be in on the conspiracy for it to work, its not much of a conspiracy. With one real world exception: > > The conspiracy to convince children that Santa Claus exists However, what happens with your example is what would inevitably happen. The people involved in that conspiracy leak that it is a hoax all the time. ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2021, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/57 "2021-09-18T11:47:50Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > That has always been the most unbelievable aspect of the whole stolen election conspiracy. The other unbelievable part is that these nefarious evildoers would do this while also weakening the Democrats hold in the House, barely taking the Senate, and doing nothing at the state level. The Democrats were expected to do better in the Senate than they did, and they fucked it up, while somehow secretly importing tons of illegal ballots. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2021, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/58 "2021-09-18T16:05:58Z")
I don’t know why they don’t just report that they found 100,000 fraudulent votes for Biden. Who needs evidence when your conclusion was already known? With all the funny business that went on during the audit, why can’t they just report that. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2021, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/59 "2021-09-18T16:20:56Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > With one real world exception: > > The conspiracy to convince children that Santa Claus exists Makes sense. They want to believe in something that defies both physics and logic that will bring them gifts that they feel they deserve. So, just as many parents have to have a hard conversation, how do we break it to the Republicans that the audit isn’t going to bring them a pony this year? ---
**Author:** ![Temporary\_Name](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@Temporary\_Name](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Temporary_Name)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2021, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239/60 "2021-09-18T17:04:50Z")
Cyber Claus? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-arizona-audit/949239.md?page=4)