# The Babylon Bee **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 24, 2019, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152 "2019-08-24T12:12:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/1 "2019-08-24T12:12:12Z")
A Babylon Bee article was just cited in Great Debates, and rather than derail that thread, I decided to start a new one. The site is the Cargo Cult equivalent of humor and good writing written by the Far Right who think that they understand the concepts, but don’t. For instance, in [the cited article](https://babylonbee.com/news/fda-investigating-link-between-vaping-looking-like-a-total-cheese-bag), on top of being loosely written and meandering all over the place they write: > [@](#): > > Vaping is a practice that has risen in popularity in recent years among full-grown adults who don’t mind appearing as though they’re sucking on tiny juice boxes throughout the day, like children. A sentence that is almost well written, except that rather than allowing the audence to understand what is implied through subtext they have to raise to all the subtilty of pounding you in the head with a hammer by including “full-grown” and “like children.” (Granted, their main audience is probably [far too stupid](https://friendlyatheist.patheos.com/2019/08/21/the-babylon-bees-satire-is-confusing-christians-who-think-the-stories-are-real/) to grasp subtlety.) Another example comes from [this](https://babylonbee.com/news/progressive-church-allows-anyone-interrupt-sermon-with-their-point-of-personal-privilege) recent article, where the mentions of bad hygene and jazz hands contribute nothing to the story other than hammering the reader over the head. The writers at The Babylon Bee are incapable of telling [lighting from a lightning bug](https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/4957-the-difference-between-the-almost-right-word-and-the-right). This is on top of how many articles embrace [right](https://babylonbee.com/news/ben--jerrys-unveils-new-antifa-flavors) [wing](https://babylonbee.com/news/ocasio-cortez-proposes-counting-white-peoples-ballots-as-35-of-a-vote) [talking](https://babylonbee.com/news/portland-police-wish-there-were-some-kind-of-organized-armed-force-that-could-fight-back-against-antifa) [points,](https://babylonbee.com/news/ilhan-omar-withdraws-support-from-bill-to-save-the-earth-after-learning-thats-where-israel-is) (those being links from just the top page) [misogyny](https://babylonbee.com/news/wife-unaware-that-movie-will-answer-all-her-questions-if-she-just-pays-attention), and [Creationism](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=831734). ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/2 "2019-08-24T12:50:49Z")
Thank you for linking, not quoting. It streamlines your post and allows the readers to choose which chunks of idiocy appeal to them, which is none for me at the moment because I am half asleep, but I’ll be back with loins girded, prepared to get mad at the writers. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/3 "2019-08-24T12:51:51Z")
I saw that vaping article linked thru the vaping thread here. Low budget Onion, missing the biting satire and wit. A look at the side of the page and the other headlines and I thought: Holy shit, these guys really want to be the Onion. There’s already an Onion, and they do it right. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/4 "2019-08-24T18:38:07Z")
Mind linking the thread it was cited in? Meh, I find the Babylon Bee amusing. It’s not The Onion, but very few satirical sites are. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/5 "2019-08-24T18:48:10Z")
Thread [https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=839269](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=839269) The post in that thread [https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=21822841#post21822841](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=21822841#post21822841) ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/6 "2019-08-24T20:16:39Z")
I don’t care for the Babylon Bee either. Every now and then I see someone quote an amusing article from them but what I’ve seen are mostly misses. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/7 "2019-08-24T20:28:53Z")
Ouch. That was painful. Here’s on their lead articles: [Ocasio-Cortez Proposes Counting White People’s Ballots As Three-Fifths Of A Vote](https://babylonbee.com/news/ocasio-cortez-proposes-counting-white-peoples-ballots-as-35-of-a-vote) The joke is pretty much all there in the headline. And it’s comparing an actual historical policy that discriminated against black people with a parody policy about discriminating against white people. In order to remind people that white people are the real victims. And just to drive the point home that prejudice never happens anymore, we have this: > [@](#): > > “Like, four or five times more or something, because 3/5ths is only like 10% of a real vote.” > > She then paused as she counted on her fingers and double-checked her math on her toes. “Yeah, it adds up. Case closed. This makes the program contain 247% fewer racisms.” Get it? She can’t do math! She’s really dumb! ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/8 "2019-08-24T20:32:11Z")
I respect their attempts to gore oxen on both left and right, though it’s true their heart may be somewhat more in the left-goring. Not everyone can be The Onion. Hell, even The Onion isn’t The Onion these days, [According To Folks](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=77139) [This](https://babylonbee.com/news/archeologists-discover-original-stone-tablets-containing-the-12-rules-for-life-by-jordan-peterson) amuses me. Maybe I’m just easily amused. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/9 "2019-08-24T21:25:41Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > … Hell, even The Onion isn’t The Onion these days, [According To Folks](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=77139) > … “These days” points to a thread started 18 years ago. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2019, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/10 "2019-08-24T22:49:14Z")
> [@bobot](#): > > “These days” points to a thread started 18 years ago. Sure thing. But I just knew I’d be able to find some curmudgeon on here talking about how some well-beloved humour site had all gone to shit and boom! Google Was My Friend. Guess I coulda gone for “Cracked” instead… ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2019, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/11 "2019-08-25T04:59:35Z")
Ugh, Cracked is AWFUL now. I have to say, if the Onion articles alone would probably be the best thing about a Joe Biden presidency! ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2019, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/12 "2019-08-25T05:30:52Z")
The Bee is quite blatantly pro-conservative/right-wing, but they will mock Trump and the GOP every now and then, to try to seem balanced. Some examples: > **[Trump Announces He Was Born Of A Virgin And Will Bring Balance To The Force](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-declares-he-was-born-of-a-virgin-and-will-bring-balance-to-the-force)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a press conference Wednesday, President Trump announced he was born of a virgin and is the chosen one who will bring balance to the Force. > **[Trump To Buy Greenland, Install Shiplap, Hardwood Floors, Flip For Profit](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-to-buy-greenland-install-shiplap-hardwood-floors-flip-for-profit)** > > NUUK, GREENLAND—There have been rumors that President Trump was considering buying Greenland, and Trump has now confirmed those rumors, revealing that he sees it as a great moneymaking opportunity if the U.S. purchases the world’s largest island,... > **[Scarred, Disfigured Trump Flips Coin To Decide If He's Gonna Do Something...](https://babylonbee.com/news/scarred-disfigured-trump-flips-coin-to-see-if-hes-gonna-do-something-good-today-or-do-something-totally-insane)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—A scarred, disfigured President Trump sat brooding in the Oval Office Wednesday morning and flipped his favorite coin to determine whether he was going to do something good for the country today or do something totally insane. > **[As Sign Of Reverence, Evangelical Leaders To Begin Writing President's Name...](https://babylonbee.com/news/as-sign-of-reverence-evangelicals-to-begin-writing-presidents-name-as-tr-mp)** > > U.S.—In a press conference Friday, evangelical leaders called on their followers to begin referring to the President as "TR-MP" in all written materials, whether by hand or on the internet. > **[Trump Distracts From Previous Racist Tweets With New Racist Tweets](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-distracts-from-previous-racist-tweets-with-new-racist-tweets)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—In what's being called a "4D chess move" worthy of the greatest 4D chess grandmasters in the universe, President Trump was able to distract from some seriously questionable tweets by posting even more questionable tweets, sources... > **[Nobody Left In Nation After Trump Orders All Immigrants, Descendants Of...](https://babylonbee.com/news/nation-completely-deserted-after-all-descendants-of-immigrants-deported)** > > U.S.—After President Trump issued an executive order instructing federal agents to deport all immigrants and descendants of immigrants, the nation turned into to a vast, empty landscape with absolutely nobody in it, sources confirmed Monday. > **[Falwell, Jeffress Ask Trump If They Can Sit At His Right And Left Hands When...](https://babylonbee.com/news/falwell-jeffress-ask-trump-if-they-can-sit-at-his-right-hand-when-he-goes-into-glory)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—According to sources at the White House, Jerry Falwell, Jr. and Robert Jeffress approached President Trump in a special meeting Tuesday, asking him to sit at his right hand and left hand when he goes into glory. > **[Trump Enraged As Immigrant Child Asks Him For More Gruel](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-enraged-as-immigrant-child-asks-him-for-more-gruel)** > > TEXAS—President Trump toured the migrant holding facilities for unaccompanied minors, stopping at one in Texas to tell the press all about his cost-saving measures. “We’re serving kids thin gruel,” he proclaimed as he pointed to a vat of the... > **[Mike Pence Thrown Into Lions' Den After Being Caught Praying To God Other...](https://babylonbee.com/news/mike-pence-thrown-into-lions-den-after-caught-praying-to-god-other-than-trump)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—The second-ranking official in the United States government was literally thrown to the lions today. Vice President Mike Pence was caught violating a thirty-day executive order prohibiting anyone in the President's administration... > **[Trump Proposes Constitutional Amendment Making It Illegal To Burn Him On Twitter](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-proposes-constitutional-amendment-making-it-illegal-to-burn-him-on-twitter)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Trump has proposed an amendment to the Constitution which would make it illegal to roast him on Twitter. > **[Jerry Falwell Jr. Whips Out Sword To Hack Ear Off Man Who Briefly Criticized...](https://babylonbee.com/news/jerry-falwell-whips-out-sword-to-hack-ear-off-man-who-briefly-criticized-donald-trump)** > > LYNCHBURG, VA—According to sources at Liberty University, school president Jerry Falwell, Jr. hacked the ear off a man who said a few words criticizing Donald Trump. > **[Trump Announces More Aid For Farmers Hurt By Tariffs Passed To Raise Money...](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-announces-more-aid-for-farmers-hurt-by-tariffs-passed-to-raise-money-for-aid-used-for-farmers-hurt-by-previous-tariffs)** > **[Trump Awards Medal Of Freedom To Legendary Golfer Happy Gilmore](https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-awards-medal-of-freedom-to-legendary-golfer-happy-gilmore)** > > WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Trump has awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to legendary golfer Happy Gilmore. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2019, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/13 "2019-08-25T05:32:15Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Ugh, Cracked is AWFUL now. Cracked was in a downward quality and financial spiral for a long time. One sure symptom of it was when they locked up the comments section (usually one of the funnest things about Cracked articles, even funner than the articles themselves) and allowed only paying subscribers to leave comments. That instantly dried up the comments and destroyed a good reason for their readership. ---
**Author:** ![ralfy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ralfy/32/600_2.png) [@ralfy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralfy)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/14 "2019-08-26T13:19:35Z")
[“Snopes and other humorless media liberals hate the Babylon Bee and forget the purpose of satire”](https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/snopes-and-other-humorless-media-liberals-hate-the-babylon-bee-and-forget-the-purpose-of-satire) > [@](#): > > If Jonathan Swift wrote _A Modest Proposal_ today, Snopes would fact-check it. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/15 "2019-08-26T13:39:03Z")
_The Babylon Bee_ is no Jonathan Swift. _The Babylon Bee_ doesn’t even rise to the satirical skills of _Taylor_ Swift. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/16 "2019-08-26T13:56:00Z")
If Jonathan Swift wrote _A Modest Proposal_ today, Snopes would probably **need** to explain it because sheep would be sharing it on social media platforms and frothing about how offensive it is. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/17 "2019-08-26T14:01:23Z")
As far as I can tell from clicking on the links in this thread and the site main page, they’re just not very good at satire. The anti-Trump stuff isn’t any better than the pro-Trump or anti-Democrat stuff. Just bad and lazy writing. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/18 "2019-08-26T14:05:51Z")
I agree with that. But apparently if you don’t appreciate it something something liberal media. ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/19 "2019-08-26T14:12:18Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > If Jonathan Swift wrote _A Modest Proposal_ today, Snopes would probably **need** to explain it because sheep would be sharing it on social media platforms and frothing about how offensive it is. “today”? People were frothing about how offensive it was when he wrote it. Technology may change. People generally don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152/20 "2019-08-26T15:42:31Z")
> [@ralfy](#): > > [“Snopes and other humorless media liberals hate the Babylon Bee and forget the purpose of satire”](https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/snopes-and-other-humorless-media-liberals-hate-the-babylon-bee-and-forget-the-purpose-of-satire) This is more a commentary on the intelligence of the typical Babylon Bee reader than it is on Snopes. The typical Onion reader doesn’t need somebody to explain to him that the things he reads on the website aren’t real. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-babylon-bee/839152.md?page=2)