# The BBQ Pit- How do you know when they are trashing you ? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 17, 2004, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517 "2004-05-17T01:43:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/1 "2004-05-17T01:43:08Z")
The topic deserves a little more explanation. Obviously, _if_ I happen to be in the Pit \*and \* see nasty things about me, that’s one way to tell. _However_, I rarely visit the Pit, so if they are saying rotten things about me, how would I know? If someone were to do such a thing, I’d trust they’d have the courtesy to send me an E-Maill so I could go there and give them “what for”. So, are there limits to the SDMB even in the Pit? I would hope so. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/2 "2004-05-17T02:25:19Z")
Most of the time, someone will post a link to a the pit thread that’s been started in your honor in the thread in which your offensive behavior (whether real or perceived) took place. So you will normally know about it, at least if you continue to read the threads you post to. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/3 "2004-05-17T02:27:12Z")
And if you miss it, so what? ---
**Author:** ![Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laughing_Lagomorph)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/4 "2004-05-17T02:42:46Z")
If you periodically search on your username or a portion thereof (as a keyword) you will find instances where people used your name in a post, a likely prospect if they are Pitting you. Before the recent board upgrade you could also find when people quoted you by this method, but that doesn’t work anymore. ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/5 "2004-05-17T03:41:20Z")
Thanks for the replies. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/6 "2004-05-17T04:05:54Z")
Or you could find that a thread you started in IMHO was moved to the pit by one of our loving admins. What? I’m just saying… ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/7 "2004-05-17T04:23:47Z")
> [@Ringo](#): > > And if you miss it, so what? Sometimes a Pitting is due to a misunderstanding, which can be clarified in a pit thread. Sometimes you may not be aware that something you have said might offended someone. It may help you if you understand that, even if you don’t think the other person was justified in being offended. **handy** claimed he never went into the Pit, and he never responded to his regular Pittings. I suspect this contributed to his eventual banning, because he simply ignored how much his behavior in GQ pissed a lot of people off, rather than trying to change it. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/8 "2004-05-17T04:36:54Z")
Agreed, **Colibri** , that some revelation or clarification perhaps can come from a Pitting. My comment meant to reflect my own perception that The Pit generally exhibits a very low signal to noise ratio. ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/9 "2004-05-17T05:03:19Z")
Luckily, I’ve never started nor have I posted to a thread that has gone to The Pit. (Yes, my parents are very proud of that) 😃 And **Ringo** I can see your point about the futility of going to the Pit to defend yourself or clarify a point made in a “regular” forum. It would be like going on “The Gong Show” to discuss Relativity Theory. LOL ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/10 "2004-05-17T05:33:16Z")
Just because it’s in the pit, doesn’t mean it’s stupid, or that the posters are stupid either. We had a pit thread on the definition of Parallel lines! High powered mathematics types, swapping low blows! Strong language, and fundamental geometry theory! And a good time was had by all. (aside from a little bit of blood letting.) Tris. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/11 "2004-05-17T06:35:20Z")
It wasn’t **handy’s** ignoring of the feelings of the greater populace of the SDMB that got him banned. It was his ignoring of the warnings of the moderators that got him banned. No matter how unpopular someone is with the rank and file, they aren’t going to get banned unless they break rules. **december** stuck around for years before he finally stepped over the “jerk” line. **squrlcub** was a fairly popular, generally liked poster until he pulled the stunt that got him banned. So **our** perceptions of a poster have jack-spit to do with whether they get banned or not. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/12 "2004-05-17T21:05:03Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > It wasn’t **handy’s** ignoring of the feelings of the greater populace of the SDMB that got him banned. It was his ignoring of the warnings of the moderators that got him banned. No matter how unpopular someone is with the rank and file, they aren’t going to get banned unless they break rules. **december** stuck around for years before he finally stepped over the “jerk” line. **squrlcub** was a fairly popular, generally liked poster until he pulled the stunt that got him banned. So **our** perceptions of a poster have jack-spit to do with whether they get banned or not. Correct, but I think you miss my point a little. (Perhaps I wasn’t clear enough about making it.) True, it’s violation of actual warnings that get someone banned. However, repeated pittings - especially by different posters - should be a wake-up call to any but the terminally clueless that they are violating “community standards,” and hence being a jerk in terms of the community. **handy’s** violation of warnings is specific cause of why he was banned. My point is that, if **handy** had paid attention to the pittings, he might have changed his behavior enough so he would have avoided getting banned. People who rack up a lot of pittings almost always end up being banned in the long run. It usually indicates someone who, at best, is skirting close to the edge of jerkish behavior. Like someone who habitually speeds, it’s pretty much just a matter of time until they cross over the edge and crash and burn. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2004, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/13 "2004-05-17T21:19:46Z")
> [@Triskadecamus](#): > > Just because it’s in the pit, doesn’t mean it’s stupid, or that the posters are stupid either. > > We had a pit thread on the definition of Parallel lines! > > High powered mathematics types, swapping low blows! > > Strong language, and fundamental geometry theory! > > And a good time was had by all. (aside from a little bit of blood letting.) > > Tris. I think you used a very low value of “all” in your post. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lobelia\_Overhill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/54ee81/32.png) [@Lobelia\_Overhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobelia_Overhill)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2004, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/14 "2004-05-18T20:12:31Z")
Unless you look, you don’t know. Or you do what I do and use the **New Posts** facility and the thread pops up there. And seriously, for using colour and a different font than the default? Puh-leeze :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/15 "2004-05-22T02:27:54Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > **handy’s** violation of warnings is specific cause of why he was banned. My point is that, if **handy** had paid attention to the pittings, he might have changed his behavior enough so he would have avoided getting banned. > > People who rack up a lot of pittings almost always end up being banned in the long run. It usually indicates someone who, at best, is skirting close to the edge of jerkish behavior. Like someone who habitually speeds, it’s pretty much just a matter of time until they cross over the edge and crash and burn. But if he was telling the truth when he said he never went into the Pit, then how was he supposed to know? I have seen cases where someone says, “I can’t keep talking to you in this forum” and posted a link to a Pitting. Or a third party says “Poster X, you’re wanted [here].” Did **handy** get alerts of that kind? (It does occur to me that he might have avoided the Pit just so he would have deniability.) But are we all obligated to scan the Pit everyday just in case we’re being Pitted? Someone scared the poo out of me once by titling a Pit thread “Rilchiam, what are you DOING?!?!” when their only “issue” with me was that I was listing my location as “Uncomfortable chair”. They wanted to tell me about ergonomic chairs. :dubious: AFAIR, that was my only direct Pitting, as such, and it would have been much better suited to MPSIMS. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2004, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/16 "2004-05-22T03:02:36Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > Did **handy** get alerts of that kind? (It does occur to me that he might have avoided the Pit just so he would have deniability.) As I recall, he was given links to at least some of his pittings in the threads that prompted them. He must have known about at least some of them. But handy also had a habit of only posting once to a thread (usually misinformation) and never going back to it, so he may have missed some of them. If you miss a pitting or two, no big deal. But if you are being pitted a lot, there’s no way you’ll miss it. ---
**Author:** ![Briny\_Deep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/briny_deep/32/17188_2.png) [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2004, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/17 "2004-05-22T03:18:33Z")
> [@Lobelia Overhill](#): > > And seriously, for using colour and a different font than the default? Puh-leeze :rolleyes: You’re within the limits of acceptability. Navy, Verdana, isn’t too out there. You’re no raisinbread. I am certain I will never be pitted, unless my internal censor unexpectedly malfunctions. I’m basically Born to be Mild. Still, hope springs eternal. ---
**Author:** ![B.Serum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/b.serum/32/14266_2.png) [@B.Serum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B.Serum)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2004, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/18 "2004-05-23T04:49:38Z")
> [@wolf\_meister](#): > > Luckily, I’ve never started nor have I posted to a thread that has gone to The Pit. (Yes, my parents are very proud of that) Oh… and you’re s-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o superior to the rest of the people who post in the Pit, aren’t you? Well, my friend, [YOUR TIME HAS COME!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=4888033#post4888033) :mad: ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2004, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/19 "2004-05-23T13:20:47Z")
> [@Rilchiam](#): > > Someone scared the poo out of me once by titling a Pit thread “Rilchiam, what are you DOING?!?!” when their only “issue” with me was that I was listing my location as “Uncomfortable chair”. They wanted to tell me about ergonomic chairs. :dubious: AFAIR, that was my only direct Pitting, as such, and it would have been much better suited to MPSIMS. I’ve seen other Pit threads started that really belonged in MPSIMS, and not just joke threads. Seems to me that a rant or complaint doesn’t automatically have to go there, especially if the language used to express it is clean, or it’s more humorous than vitriolic. Certainly a helpfully meant thread like that doesn’t belong in the Pit. I have periods of Pit-wallowing, followed by periods of avoiding it and returning to the (relative) sanity of MPSIMS, but it seems to me it doesn’t hurt to at least skim the thread titles fairly often to see what’s up. Soometimes the discussions sparked by a Pitting can be fascinating. Remember **Polycarp’s** Pitting for his conjectures about Christ’s return? That turned into an amazing thread. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2004, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517/20 "2004-05-23T13:37:39Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Correct, but I think you miss my point a little. (Perhaps I wasn’t clear enough about making it.) True, it’s violation of actual warnings that get someone banned. However, repeated pittings - especially by different posters - should be a wake-up call to any but the terminally clueless that they are violating “community standards,” and hence being a jerk in terms of the community. **handy’s** violation of warnings is specific cause of why he was banned. My point is that, if **handy** had paid attention to the pittings, he might have changed his behavior enough so he would have avoided getting banned. > > People who rack up a lot of pittings almost always end up being banned in the long run. It usually indicates someone who, at best, is skirting close to the edge of jerkish behavior. Like someone who habitually speeds, it’s pretty much just a matter of time until they cross over the edge and crash and burn. **handy’s** problem was that he didn’t listen to ANYONE, mod or poster. I don’t know why anyone would bother posting to a message board if one is not going to read a great deal more than one posts. If one just wants to write, there’s LJ, or just opening up a new text document. But in **handy’s** specific case, he was warned repeatedly not to post incorrect messages, especially in the medical area. He HAD to have known that he was posting pure bullshit a great deal of the time. And I’ve noticed, too, that frequently pitted people are apt to be banned. Part of this is my doing. I’ll notice that someone’s been pitted, and if there’s a link, I’ll follow it. If I find that poster X is indeed being a jerk, and is consistently a jerk, I’ll nominate poster X for banning in modmail. Even if I didn’t do this, if a person is frequently pitted, I’d say that that person needs to do a lot of soulsearching. Getting pitted once or twice is not so bad, but getting pitted on a regular basis SHOULD be a wakeup call. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-how-do-you-know-when-they-are-trashing-you/245517.md?page=2)