# The BBQ Pit Virgin Registry **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 18, 2000, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822 "2000-05-18T01:43:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/1 "2000-05-18T01:43:39Z")
My children come forth, al ye who have never begun a thread in that dark and murky muckhole, the BBQ Pit. Proud am I to say that I am one, and pledge to remain unsoiled for all of eternity. Or until somebody gets me mad enough. Ye who come forward as truly clean will henceforth be granted the immaculate title, BBQ Pit Virgin, on a 3×5 index card suitable for filing or adding to thy sig line, and thy name will go down in history (I bought a little white book just for the occasion). Beware the temptation of the Pit, for even replying there more than a handful of times may cause thee to become irreversibly soiled. In such a case, I will have no choice but to strip thee of thy virgin status (which could actually be fun, too). Ye few worthy souls who confess to thy dirty sinful ways & pledge never to venture back into the abyssal realm of the pit may kneel before me and beg for exorcism, so that the demons might be cast out and thy virginity restored. Who among ye shall come forward and _ **testify** _? * * * opus- Comptroller of the BBQ Pit Virgin Registry ---
**Author:** ![dragonlady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5f8ce5/32.png) [@dragonlady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dragonlady)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/2 "2000-05-18T01:46:13Z")
Yea, I swear that n’er have I wondered in to the Pit. My reputation is unsullied. I beseech thee to grant me Virgin status! ---
**Author:** ![Snark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Snark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snark)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/3 "2000-05-18T04:11:40Z")
I started a pit thread flaming myself once. Does that count? If not, you can make me a “technical Pit virgin” (since I only flamed myself, no one else!). ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/4 "2000-05-18T04:27:04Z")
I haven’t been to the pit much yet. Maybe a few times but not much. Not much at all. I never even got my Flame from Satan _pouts_ ---
**Author:** ![Talkinsquirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f6c823/32.png) [@Talkinsquirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Talkinsquirrel)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/5 "2000-05-18T04:46:28Z")
All I did was lurk! I swear!! I wanna be a virgin too!! oh wait…that doesnt sound right… ---
**Author:** ![Nacho4Sara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Nacho4Sara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nacho4Sara)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/6 "2000-05-18T04:50:48Z")
I was ATTACKED in the pit by Johnnyharvard/IgnoramusT.Asshole, but I never actually went there…just followed a link from the GD. I encourage you all to read it, it’s called Nacho4Sara bring it on or something to that effect. Very funny, especially when everyone jumps down his throat. I posted once or twice and will never do it again. Can I be a born again? Please? ---
**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/7 "2000-05-18T05:12:14Z")
No technicalities needed – never been there. Not even once! Catrandom ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/8 "2000-05-18T05:50:49Z")
I beseach you master…please take pity unto me…\ For, ne’er have I **started** a flame in the pit. Alas, I am dirtied to thy bone from responding, and must be imparted a blessing from thee if I am to continue on… \ -Sam ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Zero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@Saint\_Zero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Zero)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/9 "2000-05-18T06:18:04Z")
I love BBQ! Ribs, Roast, Ham, Beef in general… Oh wait… Flames. Insults, that sort of thing. Yup, Unsullied here, do I qualified? ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/10 "2000-05-18T06:26:03Z")
Fine. stay away. We don’t want you there anyway! Neener, neener, neener! * * * Yer pal, Satan _TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING: One month, one week, two days, 4 hours, 26 minutes and 30 seconds. 1567 cigarettes not smoked, saving $195.92. Life saved: 5 days, 10 hours, 35 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![DAYIUZ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DAYIUZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DAYIUZ)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/11 "2000-05-18T06:39:10Z")
Oh sweet giver of life, I throw myself before you. I have, on occation, strayed into the Pit to see what all the ruccuss was about. Upon witnessing the filth and realizing that it was starting to stain my clothing I ran away, never to return. I immediatly burned those clothes. Please, “Virginize” me. I just want to belong… ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/12 "2000-05-18T08:59:49Z")
Don’t get me wrong Satan…I’m just going for a virginal recharge here. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![funneefarmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@funneefarmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/funneefarmer)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/13 "2000-05-18T10:00:16Z")
There’s a BBQ Pit around here ? I’m really going to have to stop spending so much time in GQ and MPSIMS. ---
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/14 "2000-05-18T10:58:02Z")
I cannot ask for redemption. I am part of the Pit, pitiful I know, but what can I say? I love it. ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/15 "2000-05-18T11:27:23Z")
I am quite the pit attender, but I was wondering if posting here will let me lose my virginity again. I figure that couldn’t be a bad thing. ---
**Author:** ![It\_is\_to\_laugh-Non](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ec9cab/32.png) [@It\_is\_to\_laugh-Non](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_is_to_laugh-Non)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/16 "2000-05-18T12:01:53Z")
Born again virgins are always the most pious kind. Lots of popes were fathers before they found their calling. (And some after, but that’s born again un-virgin.) ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/17 "2000-05-18T12:20:21Z")
I’ve never started a thread in the Pit. Posted to them, yes. Please be gentle. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/18 "2000-05-18T12:35:11Z")
You know what they say, If you haven’t been in the pit in 30 days, you’re re-virginated. ( Maybe it’s if you haven’t had sex in 30 days?) Oh, and green m&m’s make you horny, too. ---
**Author:** ![WIGGUM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ce7236/32.png) [@WIGGUM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WIGGUM)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/19 "2000-05-18T13:21:13Z")
I am most definitely a “Pit Lurker”. I’ve posted to topics on four occassions, but never started a thread or flamed anyone. So I guess I’m a pussy, but I love The Pit. It reminds me of when I was in high school and “Cat Fights” would break out in the hallway as I stood and looked on in amazement. In a strange way those fights, and the action in The Pit turns me on. Is that wrong? Should I not feel that way? ---
**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2000, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822/20 "2000-05-18T13:26:10Z")
I suppose my thread in the pit entitled " I can whip any sonofbitch on this board" exempts me from virgin status right? I thought so. 😃 What Satan said. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bbq-pit-virgin-registry/19822.md?page=2)