# The bears are teaching themselves kung fu! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 7, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349 "2010-06-07T21:47:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Xan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/ac8455/32.png) [@Xan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xan)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/1 "2010-06-07T21:47:02Z")
[Not yet a master, but he/she is getting there](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ghgg_fukbvU) As far as I know this video should be safe for work. It just shows a bear tossing a stick around in ways I didn’t think animals lacking opposable thumbs could do. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/2 "2010-06-07T21:55:55Z")
Well, we’re boned. I propose we teach our bears how to use machine guns then we might stand a chance in the upcoming war. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/3 "2010-06-07T22:02:08Z")
[My opinion is unchanged](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=7845516&postcount=12). ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/4 "2010-06-07T22:06:51Z")
You know what would be worse than a bear with kung fu skills? A [fire wielding elephant](http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/breaking-news/flame-throwing-elephants-clash-with-humans-over-resources-in-bangladesh/story-e6frf7jx-1225876475912) > [@](#): > > “I’ve seen an elephant snatch a torch from a man with its trunk while we were driving away a herd, and throw the flame on a house, setting it on fire,” ---
**Author:** ![Cort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/77aa72/32.png) [@Cort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cort)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/5 "2010-06-07T22:59:56Z")
Stephen Colbert has been notified. ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/6 "2010-06-07T23:14:04Z")
That’s hilarious. Just goes to show that bored bears do the same things as bored humans. ---
**Author:** ![Gukumatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@Gukumatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gukumatz)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/7 "2010-06-07T23:15:45Z")
[We’re fucked.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaRRMbPwdwc) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/8 "2010-06-07T23:20:32Z")
The only thing worse than this is if cats get opposable thumbs. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2010, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/9 "2010-06-07T23:34:14Z")
> [@Cort](#): > > Stephen Colbert has been notified. If he doesn’t have something to say about this video, I will be very sad. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2010, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/10 "2010-06-08T00:02:50Z")
He’s just a diversion for the warthogs building a rocket launcher in the next cage. ---
**Author:** ![Beerman1963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/2acd7d/32.png) [@Beerman1963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beerman1963)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2010, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/11 "2010-06-08T00:13:30Z")
I for one welcome our new Ursine Overlords ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2010, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/12 "2010-06-08T02:05:23Z")
Well, that video is certainly making me rethink my position on the right to arm bears. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2010, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/13 "2010-06-08T13:02:39Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > The only thing worse than this is if cats get opposable thumbs. 🙂 [Uh-oh.](http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/04/13/i-have-evolved-thumbs/) ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2010, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/14 "2010-06-08T18:51:32Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > You know what would be worse than a bear with kung fu skills? A [fire wielding elephant](http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/breaking-news/flame-throwing-elephants-clash-with-humans-over-resources-in-bangladesh/story-e6frf7jx-1225876475912) It’s just a matter of time before they begin shooting Napalm from their trunks. We’re boned if that ever happens. ---
**Author:** ![Runs\_With\_Scissors](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/278dde/32.png) [@Runs\_With\_Scissors](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runs_With_Scissors)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2010, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-bears-are-teaching-themselves-kung-fu/542349/15 "2010-06-09T03:17:48Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > The only thing worse than this is if cats get opposable thumbs. 🙂 They don’t need them. They have billions of people worldwide doing their instant bidding. We’re doomed. And I’m not a cat person.