# The best breakup song **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 26, 2000, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446 "2000-04-26T21:17:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![neutron\_star](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@neutron\_star](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neutron_star)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/21 "2000-04-27T08:33:00Z")
Ben Folds Five - Song for the Dumped ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/22 "2000-04-27T11:21:00Z")
The ultimate is ‘I’d rather see you dead’ by The Pat Travers Band. ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/23 "2000-04-27T12:49:00Z")
Spooje, I love that one… * * * Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/24 "2000-04-27T12:52:00Z")
“Barely Breathing” by Duncan Sheik. * * * Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good dipped in chocolate. ---
**Author:** ![Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wonko_The_Sane)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/25 "2000-04-27T13:05:00Z")
The best breakup song? “Eat My Shorts” seems to be the best. With quotes of “Eat my shorts! Choke on polished Cotton! Eat my shorts! Everything we had was rotten, and baby, baby, baby, I’ll see you in court! Eat my shorts!” ## A classic, timeless song. I have no digital watch ---
**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/26 "2000-04-27T13:08:00Z")
“(I ain’t) Missing You” * * * You must unlearn what you have learned. – Yoda ---
**Author:** ![pLt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/eb9ed0/32.png) [@pLt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pLt)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/27 "2000-04-27T13:20:00Z")
I can’t believe no one has said anything !! “Romeo and Juliet” by Dire Straits! ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/28 "2000-04-27T13:25:00Z")
Actually, Romeo & Juliet is kind of sad. I think they’re looking for cynical, “in-your-face” songs. Does anyone remember that song by Mucky Pub that started with a vomiting sound? “You Stink”, IIRC… ---
**Author:** ![Jai\_Pey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a4c791/32.png) [@Jai\_Pey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jai_Pey)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/29 "2000-04-27T14:11:00Z")
“2 out of 3 ain’t bad” by Meatloaf. Then again, there’s “NFB” by Anthrax. If you ain’t heard this one, where were you in the early 90’s? Heck man, I heard it and I can’t remember where… Regards, Jai Pey ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/30 "2000-04-27T14:20:00Z")
“I’ll be glad when you’re dead, you rascal, you! I’ll be tickled to death when you leave this earth, you know! I’ll be singin’ ‘hi-de-hi!’ when they drag your body by— I’ll be glad when you’re dead, you rascal, you!” ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/31 "2000-04-27T14:43:00Z")
“You’re leaving me! - Can I come too?” Don’t know the singer but you gotta know it’s country… ---
**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/32 "2000-04-27T14:59:00Z")
Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I’m Kissing You Goodbye * * * One of the few to be personally welcomed to this board by Ed Zotti. Yours truly, aha ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/33 "2000-04-27T15:11:00Z")
I have a couple faves…one that’s only kinda a breakup song is “Hats Off To Larry” by Del Shannon. Great tune, even though it’s less than 2 minutes long. Sample: Hats off to Larry, he broke your heart Just like you broke mine when you said we must part He told you lies, now it’s your turn to cry cry cry Outta there, he said, goodbye to you. The absolute best is good ol’ Weird Al Yankovic’s “One More Minute”. I’d rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumbtacks, Or stick my nostrils together with crazy glue. I’d rather dive into a swimming pool filled with double-edged razor blades Than spend one more minute with you. ---
**Author:** ![missbunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/76d3ee/32.png) [@missbunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missbunny)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/34 "2000-04-27T15:31:00Z")
For the screw-you type of song, I would say “How Do You Sleep” by John Lennon (okay, so it’s not for a romantic breakup but it’s still a breakup). For sad, one of my favorites is “Seoladh na nGanhmna,” which is an Irish traditional, as sung by Hothouse Flowers on _Home_: But now my love as you are leaving It remains our love was not in destiny I place three kisses upon each finger To you my love farewell five hundred times I guess it sounds a lot sadder when you listen to it. ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/35 "2000-04-27T16:55:00Z")
C’mon it \*\*has \*\* to be, No Regrets-The Walker Brothers ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2000, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/36 "2000-04-27T16:59:00Z")
I’m partial to “Jerk” by Kim Stockwood: "Since you’ve been gone, I feel so much better when I saw how mean you could be I used to want some explanation, now all I want is my Patsy Cline CD. How I’ve waited for today, when I could finally say: (refrain) You jerk (you jerk), you are such a jerk there are other words, but they just don’t work… “Goodbye Joe” by folksinger Si Kahn is also good - it’s sung from the POV of a woman whose husband had been catting around on her, so she decided to return the favor before walking out on him. The refrain goes: “So it’s goodbye, Joe, you know I hate to go, but I had to make sure you were the last to know, can’t tear me down no more, I’ve evened the score with you.” ---
**Author:** ![Ophelia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/c67d28/32.png) [@Ophelia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ophelia)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/37 "2000-04-28T05:04:00Z")
I always liked this one by Gloria Estefan: “Go away, won’t you just go away. Leave right now, don’t you come back one day Take yourself, don’t bother to say goodbye. Leave right now, don’t even matter why. …yeah people have the right to party and you won’t let them have their fun. …Ciao ByeBye Hasta La Vista Fare Thee Well, Adios So Long” Wish I had all the lyrics to it. It’s more for fun, than bitter/angry or just plain sad. It can actually pep you up and give you some attitude!! ## Hi-ya! “I can never give a ‘yes’ of a ‘no.’ I don’t believe everything in life can be settled by a monosyllable” \*Betty Smith ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/38 "2000-04-28T05:17:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by aha: > Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I’m Kissing You Goodbye Is that a song, too? The time I saw that phrase, it was the title of a book by Cynthia Heimel. (She also wrote “If You Can’t Live Without Me, Why Aren’t You Dead Yet?” The lady’s got a gift for book titles.) * * * Homepage: [www.galacticgovernment.gov](http://www.galacticgovernment.gov) Occupation: Galactic Emperor Location: Trantor Interests: Palace intrigue, hereditary successors –Profile by **UncleBeer** ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/39 "2000-04-28T05:20:00Z")
Can’t leave out “Don’t Go Away Mad, Just Go Away” by Blondie. ---
**Author:** ![ReservoirDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8edcca/32.png) [@ReservoirDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ReservoirDog)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2000, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446/40 "2000-04-28T05:25:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by neutron star: > **Ben Folds Five - Song for the Dumped** Aw, man. You took mine. Here’s some lyrics: \*So you wanted to take a break. Slow it down some, Have some space. Well, fuck you too! Give me my money back, Give me my money back, you bitch. I wish I hadn’t bought you dinner right before you dumped me on your front porch. Give me my money back, Give me my money back, you bitch! Give me my money back, Give me my money back, you bitch! And don’t forget to give me back my black T-shirt.\* That song cracks me up. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-best-breakup-song/16446.md?page=3)