# The Big Golden Book of Weird Sports Quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [September 22, 2018, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755 "2018-09-22T23:02:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/21 "2018-09-25T20:24:27Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > John Madden was always good for strange, barely coherent “thoughts”: > > “What’s the toughest thing in a professional football game? It’s being the mother of the quarterback — toughest thing.” > > “Hey, the offensive linemen are the biggest guys on the field, they’re bigger than everybody else, and that’s what makes them the biggest guys on the field.” > > “Here’s a guy who when he runs, he moves faster.” > > “They’ll score if they can just get into the endzone.” > > “There definitely needs to be water on the sidelines for these players, but I also had some Gatorade just in case they were allergic to the water or vice versa.” > > “Well, when you’re playing good football, it’s good football and if you don’t have good football, then you’re not really playing good football.” > > And my personal favorite: > > “Mark Brunell usually likes to soak his balls before a rainy game.” [Madden’s “cantilever” tangent.](http://www.harrisfiles.com/audio/patsummerall.mp3) (starts at 5:26) ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/22 "2018-09-25T20:52:50Z")
Washington Nationals color commentator F. P. Santangelo likes to say “There goes the no-hitter!” whenever the Nationals get their first hit of the game. Doesn’t matter if it takes place in the ninth inning, or on the very first pitch. (I kinda like it, actually). ---
**Author:** ![Bijou\_Drains](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bijou_drains/32/2814_2.png) [@Bijou\_Drains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bijou_Drains)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/23 "2018-09-25T20:55:12Z")
our local Hurricanes NHL color commentator referred to Sweden as the “Stockholm infested country” ---
**Author:** ![Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulf_the_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/24 "2018-09-25T21:51:34Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > This one has a certain surrealistic wisdom to it - Because, you know, he’s right. > > From memory, Howard Cosell, doing commentary on the first Foreman-Frazier fight, noticing that Foreman was punching Frazier in the head - “the same head that was reached so often by Muhammed Ali”. If you hadn’t realized that Frazier had had the same head for some time, Howard was there for you. > > Regards, > Shodan Cosell was so unrelievedly awful, so pompous, so in love with his own abilities and vocabulary and sense of self-importance, that he really shouldn’t be allowed in this thread for fear of taking over. ---
**Author:** ![Civil\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d78d45/32.png) [@Civil\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Civil_Guy)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/25 "2018-09-25T22:06:44Z")
Another ‘Chickism’: “No harm, no foul. No blood, no ambulance, no cute nurses.” ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/26 "2018-09-25T22:22:39Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > How could I have forgotten the genius that is veteran F1 commentator Murray Walker. I came here to post this exact list. Well done! ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2018, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/27 "2018-09-26T01:12:49Z")
Imagine if Yogi had tried his hand at calling games. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2018, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/28 "2018-09-26T01:37:02Z")
NFL Ref Ron Cherry “he’s givin’ him the business down there” [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/AXOuvndUVdY/hqdefault.jpg "Ref Is Giving Him The Business") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AXOuvndUVdY) ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2018, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/29 "2018-09-26T02:34:13Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > How could I have forgotten the genius that is veteran F1 commentator Murray Walker. “The most important part of the car is the nut that holds the wheel.” is unmitigated genius. Good wordplay and a true statement. Some of the others are kind of wacky, but that one is brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2018, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755/30 "2018-09-26T03:29:56Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > From the wonderful world of football: > > Bengals coach Marvin Lewis, commenting this week on the success of kicker Randy Bullock: > > _“He’s morphed his body and feels confident about things.”_ > > Yeah, having grown those extra toes gives him more range and accuracy. :eek::smack: > > And after today’s Buffalo win over Rutgers, Buffalo quarterback Tyree Jackson said: > > _“It’s definitely a blessing, but we have to flush this behind us”_ 😕 You think those are weird quotes? Bah, if Yogi Berra was alive to hear those he’d be turning over in his grave. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-big-golden-book-of-weird-sports-quotes/821755.md?page=1)