# The body of a girl, but the brain of a boy. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 13, 2005, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325 "2005-03-13T14:19:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![me\_jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@me\_jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/me_jane)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/1 "2005-03-13T14:19:10Z")
> [@](#): > > A fourth-grader who was attending a Massachusetts elementary school as a girl before February vacation has returned to school as a boy. > > The parents of the 9-year-old child said the youngster was born with the body of a girl, but the brain of a boy. > > They have asked that he be referred to and treated as a boy by teachers and other students, and school officials are accommodating the request. The parents have even changed the child’s name. > > The child’s mother told The Eagle-Tribune that the family made the decision after consulting with medical professionals. She said the child is still biologically a girl. > > The mother has requested that the family not be identified to protect the child. > > School Superintendent C. Phillip Littlefield said there is nothing harmful about the child being in the school. [Link](http://www.nbc10.com/family/4254137/detail.html) Do you think this is wrong or right? ---
**Author:** ![TWOTfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9de053/32.png) [@TWOTfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWOTfan)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/2 "2005-03-13T14:22:32Z")
It’s a tough call. I honestly don’t know. I have to wonder, though, what the parents believe this will accomplish. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/3 "2005-03-13T14:29:55Z")
Adding a whole new quantum level to the problem of parents who can’t say “no” to their kids. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/4 "2005-03-13T14:49:25Z")
“Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side.” ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/5 "2005-03-13T14:51:40Z")
Don’t you really mean “parents who follow medical advice on their child’s behalf” there **Ethilrist**? An update was [available](http://www.boston.com/news/local/articles/2005/03/05/methuen_school_faces_parents_queries_on_students_gender_issue/) on March 5th. [Recent](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=305284) thread on this story. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/6 "2005-03-13T16:08:37Z")
I know this is an entirely different situation, but after reading _As Nature Made Him_ I can’t really think anything but that for some children, this is a good and necessary thing. ---
**Author:** ![inkleberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f17d59/32.png) [@inkleberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inkleberry)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/7 "2005-03-13T17:02:18Z")
> [@me jane](#): > > [Link](http://www.nbc10.com/family/4254137/detail.html) > > Do you think this is wrong or right? I think it’s great! The more research there is, the more we know gender is already often present at birth. The earlier it’s corrected to have the body match the known sense, the less pain the person has to go through. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/8 "2005-03-13T17:15:03Z")
As I said in the last thread, the only thing that concerns me is that his fellow students may harass this poor kid, so I hope the parents have a back up plan, in case things get too nasty. (A different school, private tutors, just in case). Other than that, I wish him well. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/9 "2005-03-13T17:33:08Z")
The real concern (IMO) is how the parents know this, other than what the kid tells them. This certitude on the part of the mother about the specific biological state of her childs brain exceeds even the most ambitious claims of neuro science in parsing out baseline gender. It’s her _opinion_ not a verifiable fact. Maybe the kid is 100% correct, but I think waiting until the child is 13 or so and able to make a more informed decision, would be a better plan than forcing this issue in the 3rd or 4th grade. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/10 "2005-03-13T17:37:28Z")
The kid is increadably lucky to have supportive parents. One of my friends once told me he was going to wait until his parents were dead to make the change. He was already partially disowned and wanted to hold on to what family he could. But his inability to be true to himself was a source of constant, near suicidal, despair. The kid is also lucky to be able to deal with puberty correctly. Pubery wreaks permanent changes on the body and make it much harder to deal with transgenderedism optimally. Imagine watching your body change forever to the form you know isn’t right. My friend feels like he was “poisoned” by the wrong hormones and is now living with the horrible effects. He’s forever sad to have lost his chance to develop his body as best he could. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/11 "2005-03-13T17:52:34Z")
> [@astro](#): > > Maybe the kid is 100% correct, but I think waiting until the child is 13 or so and able to make a more informed decision, would be a better plan than forcing this issue in the 3rd or 4th grade. But if all they’ve done is changed the kid’s name, I’d say they’re waiting. It’s not like that’s a permanent step. Don’t really see this as forcing the issue, either. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/12 "2005-03-13T18:07:14Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > But if all they’ve done is changed the kid’s name, I’d say they’re waiting. It’s not like that’s a permanent step. Don’t really see this as forcing the issue, either. Re > [@](#): > > They have asked that he be referred to and treated as a boy by teachers and other students, and school officials are accommodating the request. The parents have even changed the child’s name. It’s more than changing “Christian” to “Christina”. They have specifically asked that he be _treated_ as a boy. My real concern in this scenario is that a number of his immature 4th grade peers will likely be told by their immature parents and siblings that this is some kind of grotesque freakshow, and they will treat him with disdain and disrespect, regardless of what the school administration desires. We can rail about how unfair this is to a gender switched kid re their desire to express themselves appropriately, but (IMO) there are limits to how early you can do this in practical terms and have it be a good and useful experience for the child. ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/13 "2005-03-13T18:23:14Z")
This kid is too young to physicaly transition. Thus, it makes sense to have the kid transition in all ways but the physical right now. In the unlikely case that it is all a mistake, there is no harm, no foul, except to the point of view of the groups that don’t like genderqueers. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Miskatonic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.miskatonic/32/310_2.png) [@Mr.Miskatonic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Miskatonic)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/14 "2005-03-13T18:28:06Z")
My present GF has told me the extensive steps she went through to ‘not be a girl’ from early puberty almost through college. She is very much a girl. One must be wary of the permenance of early gender confusion issues. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/15 "2005-03-13T19:45:21Z")
> [@astro](#): > > It’s more than changing “Christian” to “Christina”. They have specifically asked that he be _treated_ as a boy. My real concern in this scenario is that a number of his immature 4th grade peers will likely be told by their immature parents and siblings that this is some kind of grotesque freakshow, and they will treat him with disdain and disrespect, regardless of what the school administration desires. And this is a danger that’s going to go away as he gets older? Having a certain segment of the population view you as a grotesque freakshow and treat you with disdain and disrespect seems to be an inescapable part of being transgendered, regardless of one’s age. It sometimes even happens right here on this board. A lot depends on the emotional maturity of the child in question. If he’s at the point where he’s able to accept that some people being assholes doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with him, I’d say this could be a very positive experience indeed. If he’s not yet reached that level of emotional maturity, then this has the potential to be very damaging indeed, though I’m not entirely sure it would be more damaging than continuing to live as a girl if he’s very strongly aware of being transgendered. There are so many variables we don’t have access to that shade and nuance this situation, that I can’t say that this is necessarily good or necessarily bad. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/16 "2005-03-13T20:01:21Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > There are so many variables we don’t have access to that shade and nuance this situation, that I can’t say that this is necessarily good or necessarily bad. I fully concur. The thing that’s giving me pause about this situation in terms of the decision to make this switch, is the ability of a\* 9 year old\* (or his parents) to make definitive statements about his fixed, lifelong gender orientation in the _4th grade_. Waiting until the kid is 13 would seem (to me ) to be prudent. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/17 "2005-03-13T20:36:04Z")
> [@astro](#): > > It’s more than changing “Christian” to “Christina”. They have specifically asked that he be _treated_ as a boy. Again, not something permanent or irreversible. In fact I don’t even know what it’s supposed to entail. This may be splitting hairs, but if anything I think nine-year-olds might be a bit more accepting of this kid than high school students would. Little kids can be mean, but when those middle- and high school insecurities start kicking in things can get absolutely vicious for a kid who doesn’t fit in. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/18 "2005-03-13T20:59:50Z")
Perhaps a switch of schools and moving to give the kid a fresh start as the other gender, I don’t know. It’s a tough call, and have to trust that the parents are responsible enough to make such a decision. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/19 "2005-03-13T21:14:21Z")
**astro** , although the link in the OP was too brief to mention it, the other links in this thread point out that this was done on the advice of medical professionals. It was not just the opinion of the parents. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325/20 "2005-03-14T04:17:12Z")
> [@ratatoskK](#): > > **astro** , although the link in the OP was too brief to mention it, the other links in this thread point out that this was done on the advice of medical professionals. It was not just the opinion of the parents. I’m all for dealing with this early - but how much is known about gender identity in kids? I’m certainly aware that most transgendered youth are aware of it before they reach adulthood. However, is it necessarily true that false positives - so to speak - are as rare as they are in adults? I don’t mean to insult the young man, and I think it’s great that his parents are dealing with this well, but - in terms of objective medical science - how much is known about transgendered kids? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-body-of-a-girl-but-the-brain-of-a-boy/294325.md?page=2)