# The Cheesiest Song of All Time **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 18, 2012, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415 "2012-11-18T15:38:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/41 "2012-11-19T01:41:47Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > Cheesy, yes. But Terry Jacks topped it! Just flip the 45 over and you’d have heard [THIS](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_pX1-IxRBY) stinker > > _“Put the bone in, she begged him!”_ I wouldn’t call this cheesy. I would call this the most unrelentingly bad song ever recorded. ---
**Author:** ![Labtrash](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/labtrash/32/528_2.png) [@Labtrash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labtrash)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/42 "2012-11-19T01:52:12Z")
> [@Dendarii\_Dame](#): > > I am staggered by how many of these songs I _own_–all but two! > > I, however, nominate Bobby Goldsboro’s _Honey_, which I don’t own. +1 ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/43 "2012-11-19T01:59:49Z")
Ray Stevens - _Everything Is Beautiful_ ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/44 "2012-11-19T02:20:15Z")
**Honey** is indeed as cheesy as cheesy cheese can be, but I’d like to see some votes for **Tie A Yellow Ribbon 'round the Old Oak Tree**. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/45 "2012-11-19T02:47:21Z")
That is a lot of fromage, people. And while I can’t argue with any of these fine examples of curdled milk product, I think you’re grasping at some low hanging fruit. Most of these are songs from the 70s, the very decade of cheese personification (by the way, nobody nominated _One Tin Soldier_?) How about R. Kelly’s horrendous _I Believe I can Fly_? Makes me stabby like a fondue fork in the eye. To be really up to date, the ubiquitous _One Direction’s_ hit _What Makes You Beautiful_ contains not only a blatant ripoff of the bass line from “Summer Nights”,but the truly craptasric line" . . . the way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed". ---
**Author:** ![Chipacabra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@Chipacabra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chipacabra)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/46 "2012-11-19T03:06:33Z")
One Night in Bangkok. … … Wait, you didn’t say “Chessiest?” ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/47 "2012-11-19T03:13:31Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > Since it’s beginning to look a lot like that season again . . . > > [Christmas Shoes](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iq10bz3PxyY). On that note, there’s also [Last Christmas](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8gmARGvPlI). ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/48 "2012-11-19T03:25:24Z")
Man! All of my best suggestions have already been mentioned (One Tin Soldier, Teddy Bear, Brandy, etc.). I guess I’ll add [Razzamatazz by John Travolta](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7fXpA3aouU). And [Escape (Pina Colada Song) by Rupert Holmes](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hf8BJVwdnY). ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/49 "2012-11-19T03:30:34Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > Cheesy, yes. But Terry Jacks topped it! Just flip the 45 over and you’d have heard [THIS](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_pX1-IxRBY) stinker > > _“Put the bone in, she begged him!”_ Jesus Christ. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/50 "2012-11-19T03:59:36Z")
[Your love is like, Bad Medicine, Bad Medicine, it’s what I need, oh woh woh.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOUtsybozjg) I hate this frigging piece of fromage. If you aren’t sold yet, [here are the lyrics.](http://www.lyricsfreak.com/b/bon+jovi/bad+medicine_20022159.html) ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/51 "2012-11-19T04:02:35Z")
This one is cheesier than a coronary bypass omelette: [![]( " - YouTube") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehToBz7zhqE) ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/52 "2012-11-19T04:05:40Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > _Delta Dawn_ 1972 > > I believe Helen Reddy’s version was the worst. Topped only by her “I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar.” :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/53 "2012-11-19T04:13:09Z")
_[Daddy, Don’t You Walk So Fast](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrlcGWRKZMo&feature=related)_-Wayne Newton ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/54 "2012-11-19T04:20:17Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > Cheesy, yes. But Terry Jacks topped it! Just flip the 45 over and you’d have heard [THIS](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_pX1-IxRBY) stinker > > _“Put the bone in, she begged him!”_ Ok, it’s a close one, but I think you win the thread. I just listened to that and I am crying because I was laughing at how cheesy that was. That is officially cheesier than even MacAurther Park. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/55 "2012-11-19T04:50:06Z")
This thread presents an adequate, uh, Muenster Mash… But the all-time top cheesemeister extraordinaire has to be Irwin Chusid: > **[Incorrect Music with Irwin Chusid and Michelle Boulé](https://wfmu.org/playlists/IM)** > > Playlists & archives ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/56 "2012-11-19T15:17:51Z")
This is unfair as country music probably has the corner on this market [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2X-_1X3hxbk/hqdefault.jpg "jim reeves - old tige") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2X-_1X3hxbk) [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QgAvHo6vpe4/hqdefault.jpg "The Shifting Whispering Sands as done by Jim Reeves") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgAvHo6vpe4) This is what should be done with cheesy rock songs, the kazoo does it for me [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/XAg5KjnAhuU/maxresdefault.jpg "Europe - The Final Countdown - Kazookeylele - Ukulele - Pockets - Cover") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAg5KjnAhuU) ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/57 "2012-11-19T15:32:11Z")
While we’re doing cheesy country songs: [God Bless The USA](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q65KZIqay4E). ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/58 "2012-11-19T16:04:28Z")
> [@DSYoungEsq](#): > > While some of the songs mentioned are certainly bad songs, but most of them are not “cheesy”. A cheesy song in my opinion has trite, bad lyrics that make you wish you’d never spent the money on purchasing the record, because you paid too much. It’s a love song that makes you cringe with the over-used metaphors In honor of our cheese expert, here are …wo, wo, wo…[Feelings](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf3BNRF9ICc) (cringeworthy even in parody) and “Silly Love Songs”. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/59 "2012-11-19T16:07:34Z")
“Watching Scotty Grow” - Bobby Goldsboro “Roses for Mama” - C. W. McCall ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415/60 "2012-11-19T16:08:16Z")
_[I Write The Songs](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-fev20voMc)_(which he did not write)-Barry Manilow [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cheesiest-song-of-all-time/641415.md?page=4)