# The CIA did \*what\* to a cat? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 5, 2001, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646 "2001-11-05T18:50:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/1 "2001-11-05T18:50:13Z")
**Caution! Scientific kitty abuse!** Just heard about the “Acoustic Kitty” project this morning. A search for the project name didn’t turn up anything where I’d expect (Pit, MPSIMS, or GQ) which leads me to believe not many of you are aware of this, or at least not the details. Around the time of the Cuban Missle Crisis, someone in the CIA came up with the bright idea of using a cat to eavesdrop on those darn Russkies. A cat was obtained, surgically implanted with batteries and a listening device; an antenna was implanted in the cat’s tail. The idea was to release the Acousitc Kitty in a Russian park near the Kremlin. Kitty would then relay all nearby conversations, hopefully of Politburo members. Except a problem surfaced during development, when the four-legged bug became hungry he wasn’t useful. So the CIA short-circuited the cat’s brain to not feel hunger. The project was finished during the mid-60’s and the kitty released in the Russian park. Kitty was promptly hit by a passing taxi and killed. Total cost of this fiasco? $16 million at the time! I hope the person(s) responsible for this royal fuck up ended up on the unemployment line the next day (or worse)! Cites: [Washington Post](http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp-dyn?pagename=article&node=&contentId=A37954-2001Sep27) [Washington Times](http://www.washtimes.com/national/20011105-27385979.htm) The Times report alludes to the procedure being done on other cats. What the fuck? There were more?! I wonder how many died or came close to dying of starvation before the CIA decided to shut down Acoustic Kitty? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/2 "2001-11-05T19:47:49Z")
i said it before, and i’ll say it again: i hate cats. this time, someone may have been listening! ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/3 "2001-11-05T19:50:02Z")
Well, that’s amusing in a really disturbing, incompetant kind of way. The CIA in the 1960s did a bunch of stupid things. At one point, they tried to kill Castro with an exploding cigar. They also tried to make his beard fall out, under the theory that "His beard is the symbol of his virility. If we make it fall out, no one will respect him, and he’ll be overthrown. And all this time you didn’t know Get Smart was a documentary… ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/4 "2001-11-05T20:06:19Z")
Can the CIA rewire MY brain so I don’t feel any hunger? I’m even willing to risk being hit by a passing taxi. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/5 "2001-11-05T20:16:07Z")
On a related note: The US Government is eradicating feral cats in some areas, one of which is Diego Garcia. The cats may be cute but there’s no food there for them other than the native birdlife which the cats have mostly destroyed. ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/6 "2001-11-05T20:29:14Z")
Damn. What’s next? [Bonsai Kittys?](http://www.bonsaikitten.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/7 "2001-11-05T21:36:21Z")
Gosh, what I wouldn’t give for a link… 5 and a half years ago, the Onion came out with an article entitled “Defense Department Boosts Funding for $15 Billion Puppycrusher.” “this is an extremely important piece of technology,” project head Eric Reed said. “But given the budget we’ve been working with, puppies were not being crushed anywhere near thin enough, nor quickly enough. A one-eighth inch thickness in 2.1 seconds on a three month old Labrador Retriever has been set as the standard but without better compression plates, even that modest goal cannot be reached.” ---
**Author:** ![PosterChild](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e274bd/32.png) [@PosterChild](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PosterChild)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/8 "2001-11-05T22:10:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > \*\*Can the CIA rewire MY brain so I don’t feel any hunger? I’m even willing to risk being hit by a passing taxi. \*\* Just thought I’d point out that no one knows how to wire any animal (human or feline) like that. Not saying I support animal torture, but the OP seems a little less than, um, completely believable. Putting a transmitter and wires under the skin of an animal doesn’t seem too difficult, (Hell, people have put much bigger things under their own skin before.) but wiring the cat brain not to feel hunger? Uh Uh. Also, it’s not like cats sit still even when they’re not hungry. If it was supposed to act like a cat, it would wander around and play and chase things, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2001, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/9 "2001-11-05T22:25:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by PosterChild \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > > \*\*Can the CIA rewire MY brain so I don’t feel any hunger? I’m even willing to risk being hit by a passing taxi. \*\* > > Just thought I’d point out that no one knows how to wire any animal (human or feline) like that. Not saying I support animal torture, but the OP seems a little less than, um, completely believable. > Putting a transmitter and wires under the skin of an animal doesn’t seem too difficult, (Hell, people have put much bigger things under their own skin before.) but wiring the cat brain not to feel hunger? Uh Uh. > Also, it’s not like cats sit still even when they’re not hungry. If it was supposed to act like a cat, it would wander around and play and chase things, anyway. \*\* Which is why I checked Snopes and news sites before even posting. The people at [urbanlegends.about.com](http://urbanlegends.about.com) seem to think the story is genuine. The National Security Archive at the GWU website has what appears to be an [orignal memo (PDF)](http://www.gwu.edu/~nsarchiv/NSAEBB/NSAEBB54/st27.pdf) on the subject. ---
**Author:** ![Bob\_Scene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Bob\_Scene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Scene)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/10 "2001-11-06T02:56:32Z")
I wonder if the CIA has ever, even once, stopped and said, “Hey wait a minute! We can’t do that! That would just be too evil!” ---
**Author:** ![Tyklfe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3e96dc/32.png) [@Tyklfe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tyklfe)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/11 "2001-11-06T03:51:38Z")
_cats are evil_ _shudder_ ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/12 "2001-11-06T04:02:41Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by PosterChild \* > Putting a transmitter and wires under the skin of an animal doesn’t seem too difficult…_\* This was casually discussed in our research group’s morning meeting by someone who claimed to have had direct contact with a person involved in the project. The engineer was mentioning inductive coupling techniques for wafer heating and brought up the cat implant as an example. Evidently, one of the problems was that in order to recharge the transmitter’s battery, they had to inductively couple the power through an implanted antenna. Tuning the inductor was very important as localized heating was a byproduct of poor coupling by the matching circuit. This tended to produce extreme levels of discomfort for the kitty in question. External recharging contacts were deemed undesirable seeing as how a cat with an electrical plug trailing out of its butt was guaranteed to raise some rather pointed questions. The issue of the animal’s hunger may have been because of conductivity problems from skin resistivity shifts due to the body salts balance changing. He also made it seem as though they managed to get some intelligence results. I’ll have to check on this. ---
**Author:** ![KP235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de0a6/32.png) [@KP235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP235)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/13 "2001-11-06T04:09:03Z")
Besides, when the damn thing would purr, the noise would overload the mics… ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/14 "2001-11-06T04:29:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KP235 \* > \*\*Besides, when the damn thing would purr, the noise would overload the mics… \*\* Could be worse. Imagine if they forgot to get the kitty fixed… ::shudders:: ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/15 "2001-11-06T05:55:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KKBattousai \* > \*\*Could be worse. Imagine if they forgot to get the kitty fixed… ::shudders:: \*\* So, you mean to say, the CIA would get involved in kitty porn? ---
**Author:** ![Eternal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecb155/32.png) [@Eternal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eternal)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/16 "2001-11-06T07:12:45Z")
And remember when the CIA tried using LSD on people as a mind control technique? Those wacky ex-Nazi spooks, what will they think of next? ---
**Author:** ![Firx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@Firx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Firx)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/17 "2001-11-06T10:20:26Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by beagledave:_ > Damn. What’s next? [Bonsai Kittys?](http://www.bonsaikitten.com/) Reassure me, please. This isn’t real… …is it? ---
**Author:** ![Eternal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecb155/32.png) [@Eternal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eternal)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/18 "2001-11-06T10:37:52Z")
It’s not. It’s just hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![Firx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@Firx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Firx)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/19 "2001-11-06T10:47:15Z")
I’m glad to hear that, **Eternal**. For a moment, I was a trifle disconcerted. ---
**Author:** ![milo\_minderbinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@milo\_minderbinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/milo_minderbinder)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2001, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646/20 "2001-11-06T14:22:03Z")
Some [pictures](http://www.konstruktiv.net/kitty_02.html) of the cyber kitty in action. milo [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-cia-did-what-to-a-cat/91646.md?page=2)