# The Colour of Magic on Ion 3/22/09
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [March 23, 2009, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513 "2009-03-23T22:09:13Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)
#### Post date: [March 23, 2009, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/1 "2009-03-23T22:09:13Z")
So I missed the first half hour of The Colour of Magic last night on Ion. I saw the remainder though and my basic impression was meh., not really all that good, might have worked as a series rather than a movie, and Sean Astin as Twoflower? No. Tim Curry can play a bad wizard so that worked but the Librarian costume was no good. Considering just how much he actually had to do in The Light Fantastic they should have gone with a real trained Orangutan instead. Plus (back to the movie vs. series point) they had to skip over soooo much awesomeness in TLF that it really suffered. I was delighted though, to see Terry at the end. The Colour of Magic is my least favorite Discworld book, but I’ve always felt that in TLF Terry started to hit his stride and it was much better so that portion of the movie was really a letdown.
Thoughts?
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### Author:  [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)
#### Post date: [March 24, 2009, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/2 "2009-03-24T17:15:30Z")
1 bump just in case. I can’t be the only Morporkian doper to have watched, can I?
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### Author:  [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)
#### Post date: [March 24, 2009, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/3 "2009-03-24T22:48:03Z")
Missed it. Will have to look for rerun.
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### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [March 24, 2009, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/4 "2009-03-24T23:26:42Z")
It’s better than Hogfather, but it’s not that great.
David Jason did a much better job as Rincewind than I expected, considering he doesn’t fit the character’s physical description whatsoever.
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### Author:  [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/5 "2009-03-25T00:08:02Z")
It was boring.
The next Discworld book to be made into a movie is _Going Postal_. Unfortunately, it’s the same production company responsible for _Colour_ and _Hogfather_ so I am non-excited.
I hope they don’t have a locked in deal on all the Discworld books or something. I’d love to see a decent big screen treatment of some of them.
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### Author:  [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/6 "2009-03-25T00:09:49Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#):
>
> David Jason did a much better job as Rincewind than I expected, considering he doesn’t fit the character’s physical description whatsoever.
I was wondering about that. It’s not unusual for me to have an image of a character completely different from how the character is actually described in the book, so I thought maybe the movie’s Rincewind was more accurate than my own image of him. But I had always imagined Rincewind to be young to middle aged, beardless, looking absolutely nothing like a wizard at all, making the wizard getup look especially comically out of place on him. Is that how the book describes him?
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### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/7 "2009-03-25T00:28:13Z")
Rincewind is tall, thin and scrawny, with a raggedy beard that looks like the kind of beard worn by people who aren’t cut out by Nature to be beard-wearers.
Basically, he looks something [like this](http://www.filmmakermagazine.com/spring2002/features/images/human_nature4.jpg).
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### Author:  [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/8 "2009-03-25T02:33:21Z")
In the book, he’s described as:
> [@](#):
>
> Scrawny, like most wizards, and clad in a dark red robe on which a few mystic sigils were embroidered in tarnished sequins. Some might have taken him for a mere apprentice enchanter who had run away from his master out of defiance, boredom, fear, and a lingering taste for heterosexuality. Yet around his neck was a chain bearing the bronze octagon that marked him as an alumnus of Unseen University, the high school of magic whose time-and-space transcendent campus is never precisely Here or There. Graduates were usually destined for mageship at least, but Rincewind-after an unfortunate event-had left knowing only one spell and made a living of sorts around the town by capitalizing on an innate gift for languages. He avoided work as a rule, but had a quckness of wit that put his acquaintances in mind of a bright rodent.
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### Author:  [@kelly5078](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kelly5078)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/9 "2009-03-25T04:47:46Z")
I only saw that it was on when it was half over. I turned it on for a while, but after being bombarded by ION’s 10000 commercials I decided to just buy the DVD. What I saw was about as amateurishly done, and nearly as poorly paced, as Hogfather. The Halmis obviously want to do the right thing by Pratchett, they just aren’t up to the task. I love Pratchett, and I’ll buy anything with his name on it, but I wish (in vain, so far) that someone would make a Discworld movie with even half the quality of Rowling’s product.
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### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/10 "2009-03-25T06:08:25Z")
I think they should forget about adapting the books, and create a whole new movie set in the Discworld, with most of the popular characters, in an original story.
That’s what I’d do.
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### Author:  [@RiverRunner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RiverRunner)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/11 "2009-03-25T14:54:37Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#):
>
> I think they should forget about adapting the books, and create a whole new movie set in the Discworld, with most of the popular characters, in an original story.
>
> That’s what I’d do.
Seems to me that a hefty bit of the charm of the Discworld novels is in the narrative, and it’s difficult to get that to come through on the screen.
I’d love to see a Discworld MMO. I don’t know how it would work, but I’d love to be able to travel around the disc and meet some of the characters.
RR
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### Author:  [@tds1273](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tds1273)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/12 "2009-03-25T16:40:00Z")
I didn’t watch it on TV, but found it online a while back. I enjoyed it. Then again, I haven’t read any of the Discworld books (d&r) so I didn’t have a basis of comparison to spoil it. I have read, and loved, Good Omens and all five of the Hichhiker’s trilogy so I could appreciate the style.
I actually sort of enjoyed Sean Astin in it. Again, having not read the books, in my mind it was like watching ‘Sam Goes on Vacation’ in a LotR meets the H2G2 kind of universe.
It also had some pretty decent eye candy for being only a made for tv movie.
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### Author:  [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/13 "2009-03-25T17:41:02Z")
> [@Frylock](#):
>
> I was wondering about that. It’s not unusual for me to have an image of a character completely different from how the character is actually described in the book, so I thought maybe the movie’s Rincewind was more accurate than my own image of him. But I had always imagined Rincewind to be young to middle aged, beardless, looking absolutely nothing like a wizard at all, making the wizard getup look especially comically out of place on him. Is that how the book describes him?
In _The Last Hero,_ he’s drawn like [this](http://www.anarchadia.co.uk/uploaded_images/the-last-hero-768740.jpg).
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### Author:  [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/14 "2009-03-25T18:46:46Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#):
>
> In the book, he’s described as:
Pratchett certainly gave up on the “Scrawny, like most wizards,” once the faculty of Unseen University became major players in the books. Just another instance of the History Monks doing a shoddy job of patching existence back together, I guess.
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### Author:  [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/15 "2009-03-25T18:53:13Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#):
>
> It’s better than Hogfather, but it’s not that great.
>
> David Jason did a much better job as Rincewind than I expected, considering he doesn’t fit the character’s physical description whatsoever.
Wow, I don’t think I could disagree more. I thought Hogfather was great, and this movie was so bad it was painful. Astin was a terrible choice, Cowan just looked silly, and Rincewind was 30 years too old.
-Joe
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### Author:  [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/16 "2009-03-25T21:58:00Z")
> [@Merijeek](#):
>
> Cowan just looked silly
> -Joe
Do you mean Cohen the Barbarian? Because I thought he looked the part.
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### Author:  [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/17 "2009-03-25T22:08:07Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#):
>
> Rincewind is tall, thin and scrawny, with a raggedy beard that looks like the kind of beard worn by people who aren’t cut out by Nature to be beard-wearers.
>
> Basically, he looks something [like this](http://www.filmmakermagazine.com/spring2002/features/images/human_nature4.jpg).
So … a young [bob denver as dobie gillis](http://www.dwaynehickman.com/images/d&m.jpg)
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### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [March 25, 2009, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/18 "2009-03-25T22:23:31Z")
> [@RiverRunner](#):
>
> Seems to me that a hefty bit of the charm of the Discworld novels is in the narrative, and it’s difficult to get that to come through on the screen.
Exactly. If you watch Hogfather and are disappointed that you can’t get that feeling of the footnotes and the turns of phrase that Pratchett puts in the narrative, then make a story where there can be no association with that factor.
Movies are around 90-120 minutes, with big budgets, and mini-serieseseses are 4-6 hours with minimal budgets. If you’re going to make a movie, then you have to have a story that fits the allotted time, and the average Discworld novel would have to be hugely trimmed to jam into that kind of duration.
An original story, that uses dialogue consistent with the characterisation, would be best. For example, the Witches look into their tea leaves and see a disaster looming, and rush to Ankh Morpork. Meanwhile, Vimes, Carrot, and Nobby discover the gruesome remains of some magical creature’s behaviour in the sewers. The Patrician calls in the the Wizards to investigate, who bumble around making a mess of things, Rincewind making it worse. The culprits are a group of disgruntled townsfolk who are dabbling in magic they don’t understand.
Something like that, anyway. I’ve kind of stolen snippets of sequences from many of the earlier books and jammed them into one story, but maybe that’s a good way to introduce the familiar foreground and background characters, rather than slavishly adhering to the books. You get to know the world it’s set in, and showcase the comedy and spectacle the early stories were filled with and known for.
Heck, I could probably write it myself.
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### Author:  [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)
#### Post date: [March 26, 2009, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/19 "2009-03-26T05:49:04Z")
> [@Finagle](#):
>
> Pratchett certainly gave up on the “Scrawny, like most wizards,” once the faculty of Unseen University became major players in the books. Just another instance of the History Monks doing a shoddy job of patching existence back together, I guess.
One supposes that the wizards as Pratchett originally conceived of them didn’t really enjoy their food what with Unseen University’s tendency to use arsenic as a seasoning. Besides, living in constant fear of foul play and sudden death tends to burn the calories. You’ve never heard of the Sword of Damocles diet?
---
### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [March 26, 2009, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-colour-of-magic-on-ion-3-22-09/490513/20 "2009-03-26T05:52:48Z")
That’s a good point. In the same way that the Watch’s former behaviour changed after Carrot arrived, and Ankh Morpork’s former status changed after Vetinari became Patrician, the Wizards’ former behaviour changed after Ridcully became Archchancellor.