# The Commerce Comet, Stretch, Mr Cub, etc **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 4, 2001, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485 "2001-06-04T04:58:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/1 "2001-06-04T04:58:16Z")
This may be a case of overcompensating for the loss of my Ted Williams autographed baseball, but what the hell. And the Williams ball is sure to turn up. If it didn’t leave the house as my family claims, than it’s just misplaced and should turn up shortly. If I can’t use my OT checks to spend on frivolities for me, then what good are they? So what to do with the extra cash? Save the money? Put it in the bank? Nope, buy more autographed baseballs. After weeks of dealing with a guy and verifying authenticity, I managed to get my hands on Warren Spahn, Willie McCovey, Ernie Banks, Pete Rose and Mickey Mantle autographed baseballs. That’s right, I said **Mickey Mantle**. Who wants to touch me? I _said_ who wants to f\*\*\*ing touch me?! ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/2 "2001-06-04T05:03:02Z")
Ooohh… Can I touch your balls? ---
**Author:** ![DynoSaur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DynoSaur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DynoSaur)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/3 "2001-06-04T05:10:04Z")
Y’know, **Crunchy** I swore I would never, ever, _ever_ say this to a man, no matter how drunk I got, but… I sure would like to see your balls… ::d&r:: ---
**Author:** ![blur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dbc845/32.png) [@blur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blur)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/4 "2001-06-04T05:23:45Z")
**Crunchy** , I have to say, I love your balls. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/5 "2001-06-04T19:09:09Z")
hmmm …counting… \*\* CRUNCHY HAS FIVE BALLS???\*\*:eek: ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/6 "2001-06-04T19:18:36Z")
Oh really people. Can we pull our minds from the gutter for just one second and admire the heirlooms that Crunchy has obtained without some brainless venture into double entendre? I mean HONESTLY. Sports and sex just don’t mix.\* jarbaby \*[sub]friends of jarbaby will realize that this post is delightfully rich with comic irony.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Clucky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@Clucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clucky)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/7 "2001-06-04T20:10:14Z")
How much did they cost? ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/8 "2001-06-04T21:36:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Clucky \* > \*\*How much did they cost? \*\* $70 for McCovey $75 for Banks $80 for Spahn $65 for Rose $625 for Mantle And **Dyno** if you really want to see my balls, next time you show up for a St Louis DopeFest I’ll see what I can do. Or, since you know where I live, maybe you can swing by before going out drinking. Still looking for the elusive and missing (dammit!) Ted Williams autographed ball though. ---
**Author:** ![Clucky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@Clucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clucky)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/9 "2001-06-04T21:45:15Z")
Holy canolis, that’s a lot of scratch. I’m surprised Mantle’s is so much more. Better condition? ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2001, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/10 "2001-06-04T22:01:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Clucky \* > \*\*Holy canolis, that’s a lot of scratch. I’m surprised Mantle’s is so much more. Better condition? \*\* All are in top condition. Mantle’s costs more because Mantle’s dead. The other four players are still alive and therefore can still sign more baseballs. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/11 "2001-06-05T00:06:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Clucky \* > > \*\*Holy canolis, that’s a lot of scratch. I’m surprised Mantle’s is so much more. Better condition? \*\* > > All are in top condition. Mantle’s costs more because Mantle’s dead. The other four players are still alive and therefore can still sign more baseballs. \*\* Unfortunately, given the memorabilia market, they ALL are probably “signing new balls”. Also unfortunately, you may have to step up the Splendid Splinter search… ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/12 "2001-06-05T00:21:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lurkernomore \* > **Unfortunately, given the memorabilia market, they ALL are probably “signing new balls”.** Yes, that’s something someone really needs to look into before buying. Many of Mantle’s autographs are fakes. You need to be wary of _anything_ that boasts Mantle and Maris signatures (not all are fake, but most) and many that were signed in the 50’s and 60’s because apparently many of the team members would have the ball boy or someone sign for them. \*\* > [@](#): > > Also unfortunately, you may have to step up the Splendid Splinter search… \*\* I know. As sad as I am that I am currently missing his signed baseball, I’ll be infinitely sadder when Teddy Ballgame passes on. He’s one of my all-time heroes. I’ll probably have to suck it up and buy a new one from Ted’s personal website for $700. Anyone care to loan me $700? I’m good for it, really. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/13 "2001-06-05T00:29:15Z")
I could make an obvious “balls” joke but I won’t-this time. Besides…I have Ernie Banks and Ryne Sandberg’s rookie cards,mint condition and autographed.🙂 Diehard,glutton for punishment,Cubs fan. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/14 "2001-06-05T00:54:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > \*\*Diehard,glutton for punishment,Cubs fan. \*\* Oh good, someone else to trash talk with. Cubs are in first place, ahead of the Cardinals by 2.5 games. Tomorrow starts the series of Cards vs. Cubs. hehehe ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/15 "2001-06-05T01:44:16Z")
Mock my Cubbies all you want,Crunchy, but at least one of our players wasn’t attacked by the automatic tarp roller. And I know that was years ago…but it’s still Darwin Award worthy. 🙂 hehehehhehehehehehehehehehehe ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/16 "2001-06-05T01:55:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > **Mock my Cubbies all you want,Crunchy,** May I? Why thank you. I’ll keep this in mind for future threads. 😉 Ya hear that **Dyno**? I have permission to mock the Cubs? \*\* > [@](#): > > but at least one of our players wasn’t attacked by the automatic tarp roller.\*\* I have no recollection of this incident and I will deny that it ever existed, regardless of whatever evidence you may present. You logic has no effect on me. In other words… Oh yeah? Well, nana nana booboo! I have 5 old men’s balls! Wow, that last sentence didn’t come out quite right. ---
**Author:** ![blur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dbc845/32.png) [@blur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blur)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/17 "2001-06-05T01:59:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hardygrrl \* > \*\* > Besides…I have Ernie Banks and Ryne Sandberg’s rookie cards,mint condition and autographed.🙂 > \*\* At the risk of turning this into a flirting thread and feeding your oh so enormous ego, you get much cooler when you say stuff like that. I have a Sammy Sosa autographed minor league card. If I can find it, its yours. My sports collecting days are over. I don’t think minor league cards are worth anything though. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/18 "2001-06-05T02:05:49Z")
::blushes:: Why,thank you blur:) BTW how YOU doing? hehehehehehehe ---
**Author:** ![nineiron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e56c9b/32.png) [@nineiron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nineiron)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/19 "2001-06-05T02:13:02Z")
Wow, that collection puts my selection of autographed photos to shame. Spahn, McCovey, Banks, Rose, and Mantle have it all over Tiant, Bledsoe, Grogan, and Buckner. That’s right, Buckner. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2001, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485/20 "2001-06-05T02:20:02Z")
**nineiron** - I also have Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Jim Edmonds, Ozzie Smith, and Stan Musial. Somewhere I also have Ted Williams, but he’s AWOL at the moment. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-commerce-comet-stretch-mr-cub-etc/67485.md?page=2)