Broomstick. there’s a group called ‘The Knitting Connection’ in Boston that I know of. They solicit donations of yarn, pass it out to knitters, who turn it into hats/scarves/gloves/etc which are collected and then given tor people (especially children) who are in shelters and such. Is there maybe something similar in your area?
The women I know who help out (mostly elderly, to be sure) find it very satisfying.
Sure does!
You are not alone! This happens to me with paperwork. Here’s how I cope: all the paperwork to be chucked goes into normal bin bags. The bin bags stay in the house for a day or three, just in case. Then they go in the rubbish bins, but only on the day after the bin-men have been. So I’ve a bit over a week to reclaim anything accidentally chucked. It’s not perfect, but it works for me.
I put it on hold at the library. I’m #4 though. Thanks
Broomstick, however you came by your stuff, it still makes perfect sense that’s it’s easier to donate than toss. (I should have used “one” rather than “you”, but people complaint that sounds affected.)
Searched for clutter, and found my way to this thread! 
So I’m not alone! Well, of course I knew that I wasn’t but still, good to find others tackling this life-chore.
I’m a newly divorced 50 year old guy, and I wound up with the house in the deal. I’ll most likely sell the house later this year so I can move closer into the city, but that will require de-cluttering quite a bit.
So here is the assessment of where I am starting. 3 bedroom house with a two car garage and an outside storage building which is about the size of one garage parking space.
[ul]
[li]Living Room - hardly any clutter unless you count one entire wall of bookshelves full of books. No first editions, but no absolute crap either.[/li][li]Den - still more books, two cabinets full of board games and miscellaneous DVDs that no one has watched or looked at in years.[/li][li]Kitchen - way too much glassware, dinnerware, etc. for a single guy.[/li][li]Master Bedroom - okay, now we are getting to the problem areas. Lots of clothes that need to be donated, shoes that probably should just be tossed, etc.[/li][li]Two guest bedrooms - have become a haven for “no where else to put this” items. Actually one isn’t too bad, since it has actually been used for guests. The second one though is really more of a storage area than anything. Not hoarder level by any means, it’s all kind of “handled” in that everything is in a box or in a closet.[/li][li]Garage. I’ve collected quite an assembly of tools, parts, and building supplies over the 16 years I’ve been in this house. Now both cars still fit in the garage, so again it’s “kinda” under control, but nonetheless I have a lot of stuff to sell/donate/toss.[/li][li]Storage Building - basically the same as the garage. Just stuff[/li][li]Other- attic, a few boxes of xmas decoration, that type of thing. Probably all needs to go.[/li][/ul]
One barrier I have is the ex-wife. Now don’t get me wrong, we are still on speaking terms, friendly terms even. Maybe back together one day, who knows. But…she was always the one who wanted to hang on to stuff. She is quite the borderline hoarder. So, as you can probably guess, the reason we have a lot of this stuff is her reluctance to let it go years ago. But now she has her own place, and it’s small. She can’t take this stuff with her. But she insists “don’t throw out a bunch of stuff without me going through it.” Which I’m fine with. But finding the time when she is willing to do that has proven to be a challenge.
So my plan is start going through the rooms above, in the order that they are listed. Anything that I think she would have even the slightest wish to hang on to goes into a “Denise box”. These boxes will be stacked up in a central location, and she will be invited to come go through them. I’ll give her a time limit of how long a box can sit before she goes through it, and if it “ages” beyond that she gets one last warning call before it goes.
Thoughts on my approach?
I begin the process tomorrow!!
My thoughts:
Anything that is yours you can do with what you will, obviously.
Don’t pile the Denise boxes in the house - have her rent a storage unit for them if you can swing that. Sell it as her having control over the items. Put the Denise boxes there. That way they really are her problem and you don’t even have to worry about time limits or throwing them out down the road.
Seconded. If it’s Denise’s stuff, she needs to be responsible for storing it and going through it over time. And this way if things turn ugly, EVERYTHING that might be hers is in her custody, and you don’t have to worry about: 1) Delaying any move you might want to make; 2) Having her come over & fight with you about items. Be sure to label any boxes well (Not just Denise, but “Den bookcase, books, Denise”) to the extent you can; that will make it easier for her if she ever gets round to going through them. Tell her ahead of time that you’ll be renting a storage unit and where; find a reasonably priced one. Another alternative is to check out the price of a POD. I know they’ll deliver that anywhere, and they’ll store it (with fees), so if she can’t afford a place now, the POD can bring it right to her door later. Just IMHO.
I completely agree with a storage locker for Denise; be a sweetie and pay for one for her for a year. A small one. (Help the woman out.)
If you are going to sell the house, ask a real estate agent and her stager to go through it with you first. They’ll know what stuff you’ll want to keep just because it “shows” well. (Hint: it’s never the stuff you actually like.)
If Denise has any equity in the house, have her there for the walk through; it will be better if she hears the recommendation directly from the professionals.
If Denise does come over, have your discards groups label in ways she’ll be sympathetic to - is she green? recyclables; compassionate? homeless shelter; pseudo-intellectual? “simplify! simplify!”
Finally - and this is completely reprehensible of me to suggest - if you really hope to get back together, make time to be with her when she is going through all her stuff, when she is likely to get swamped in sentimental memories.
I did not say that.
Went through one linen cabinet and got rid of all the sheets, towels, tablecloths etc that are too old, can’t get stains out of etc. and got a start on the second one.
We can take the fabric stuff to our Vet’s office, they use them for rescues and shelter animals.
It’s amazing how much extra room is in the closet now.
I have also started going through my huge stack of sweaters. I love to wear sweaters, but I really don’t need 5 slightly different red sweaters, or blue or …
OH! I want to go through our linens! I have a charity lined up, but I keep forgetting vets are willing to use worn ones.
Currently, though, I’m working on maintaining what I’ve got, keeping up with the dishes, laundry, garbage, etc. Although I did clear off the rocking chair in the bedroom, so yay me! (The spouse has been rocking, too).
Between the cold sapping my energy and problems with my dad trying to do more has been rough.
I’ve been battling the laundry monster, and mostly winning, this week. I think I might be able to get to 1 load or less by this afternoon.
The dishes are (mostly) done, the downstairs is (mostly) uncluttered.
That is an issue with a lot of my stuff. Much of it represents who I used to be, or who I wanted to be, rather than who I am. I’m slowly letting things go (I have a problem with dishes and glassware…) but it’s hard to admit that I’m never going to need that set of formal china or those pasta bowls or those sushi plates. I’m giving up on ambitions I used to have for myself.
My kids’ former preschool had their annual rummage sale earlier this month and I donated a boatload of stuff that the kids had outgrown. Well, technically, a minivanload, but still. The garage is now looking semi-normal instead of a like disaster area. Yay!
I have also been trying to combat clutter by not buying more stuff. I have a weakness for clearance items and good deals. I am trying to resist the good deals and only buy something if it is on my list of things that I need to buy.
I haven’t been in this thread in two and a half years. Between working too much and then being demotivated by not working at all, I have made very little progess. Until recently. My boyfriend is moving in in a few months. I had to get my act together. I have just arranged to get rid of about 75% of my clothes (I have lots, and even more I don’t wear). They will be all gone by the first week in March. I have a friend who upcycles them into new clothes. I have two bags (so far) of books for the Goodwill. I am spending an hour a day just going through stuff and pitching. It is very liberating. I am loving life right now and decluttering is a big part of it. I am loving looking at minimalist design. I think that’s where I am headed. No more stuff. I can’t wait.
What about setting up an Etsy shop and maybe making some cash off of it?
The Etsy shop is definitely in the works. I intended to open one in the summer, however -
between the new job, and the new job going from part-time to full time quickly I felt it necessary to concentrate on getting up to speed at work. That part is humming along nicely now.
my father has recently been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. Although things aren’t dire yet, I’m a little hesitant about taking on a new project under the circumstances, as I know the spouse and I will be contributing to his final care
BUT I still want to do it. So I’m organizing/cleaning up/doing some planning to open the shop anyway… but when I do so I want to be sure I have items ready to go. I do not think I should be taking on commissions or special orders at present, simply because I don’t want to blow deadlines. Either I have it ready or it doesn’t go up on Etsy.
It will happen, but I want to be careful not to overload myself during the next year given the family upheaval we know is coming.
This is sort of where we, or at least my wife is at. At last count yesterday I noted 4 tubs labeled either “art supplies” or “crafts” including several packed tight with material. She was an art major and former art teacher who still loves that stuff but never has time (somehow). Well at least a tub of fabric is lighter than a same size tub of books. Books are damn heavy!
We went thru our assorted “party goods” stuff and found over 3 tubs of paper plates, plastic ware, and various birthday and holiday stuff like napkins and plates with “Clifford the Big Red Dog” on them.
We used to entertain more.
Seriously I cant believe we have just kept buying paper plates.
But at least now we know where it is and the next time we go to an event we can say “we will bring plates and forks”.
Can I add also when labeling a box;
Make 3 labels. Top, broad side, narrow side. That way no matter how the box sits on a shelf you will know what it is.
Also go out and buy a big bunch of plastic tubs from WalMart. This way when storing they will be a more consistent size plus are sort of rodent and waterproof.
Do NOT buy clear or see thru tubs because those tend to crack.
Wish I could take the board games off your hands. I sort of collect board games.