# The describe y in x number of words challenge. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 16, 2003, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189 "2003-06-16T11:54:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2003, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/261 "2003-12-21T19:48:20Z")
A diverse and addictive community on the Internet used to destroy ignorance and amuse the teeming millions, sprinkled with know-it-alls and trolls. Elucidate us on the ways of the Illuminati in 12 words. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2003, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/262 "2003-12-21T22:08:36Z")
We could tell you everything, but then we’d have to kill you. Expound upon the advantages of electric toothbrushes over the traditional kind in 37 words. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2003, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/263 "2003-12-24T20:25:07Z")
The electric toothbrush is superior to the traditional in that you don’t need to flex your wrists while brushing. This helps those suffering from carpal tunnel syndrome brought on by posting too often to the Straight Dope. Explain the reason why Kennedy was shot. Please use only 7 words. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/264 "2003-12-24T20:34:59Z")
Because some guy wanted to be remembered. Describe the perfect glass of milk in 17 words. ---
**Author:** ![Dryfreeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@Dryfreeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dryfreeze)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2003, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/265 "2003-12-24T20:35:16Z")
Kennedy died because someone didn’t like him. Explain why Bush shouldn’t be re-elected in 13 words. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2003, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/266 "2003-12-24T20:44:16Z")
I’d like someone to have a go at my milk one too. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/267 "2003-12-25T05:19:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lobsang \* > \*\*Describe the perfect glass of milk in 17 words. \*\* The milk comes from cows, is pasteurized and homogenized, but is whole – none of that skim crap. Still up: **Dryfreeze** ’s challenge. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Babbington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Mr.Babbington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Babbington)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/268 "2003-12-25T07:54:41Z")
> [@](#): > > Explain why Bush shouldn’t be re-elected in 13 words. Because re-electing him means that the terrorists win. You don’t want that, right? I can’t think of one because I had too much wine tonight. Toasted Head Chardonnay RULES! OK. Explain why Toasted Head Chardonnay rules in 27 words. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/269 "2003-12-25T16:03:04Z")
Toasted Head Chardonnay rules because **Mr. Babbington** says so, and that’s good enough for me. So remember, folks: this Christmas, why not give yourself a Toasted Head? Wish everyone a Merry Christmas in 35 words without using the words “Merry” or “Christmas”. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/270 "2003-12-25T17:56:24Z")
we wish you a happy crimbo we wish you a happy crimbo we wish you a happy crimbo and a fabulous new year, good tidings we bring, to you and your king. Three more words. Cheer up a bored and depressed doper working Christmas day in 7 words and one bottle of something alcoholic. ---
**Author:** ![Dryfreeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@Dryfreeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dryfreeze)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/271 "2003-12-25T18:31:03Z")
Smile, we can’t drink Tequila in Iraq =( ---
**Author:** ![Dryfreeze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@Dryfreeze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dryfreeze)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/272 "2003-12-25T18:33:31Z")
Explain the irony of 15 Muslims setting up a 50ft. tall Christmas tree in 17 words. ---
**Author:** ![pufnstuff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c67d28/32.png) [@pufnstuff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pufnstuff)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2004, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/273 "2004-01-15T19:55:33Z")
> [@Dryfreeze](#): > > Explain the irony of 15 Muslims setting up a 50ft. tall Christmas tree in 17 words. Fifteen Muslims erecting a 50 foot monument to a religious figure they do not recognize… exactly WHY? Who’s the better hero… Batman or Spider-Man? And Why? 12 words ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/274 "2004-01-16T05:52:57Z")
with his 360[sup]o[/sup] spidey senses - there is no fear of dying unprepared. batman cannot fly, has no echo location etc. do explain, in 17 words, why is batman, **bat** man. ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/275 "2004-01-16T12:25:22Z")
It is difficult to fit “Rich Brooding Gotham Vigilante Man and his Nephew” on a comicbook cover. Please describe how to “sex” a cannabis sativa seedling in 11 words. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/276 "2004-01-16T17:22:22Z")
Unfortunately the board rules don’t allow us to discuss illegal topics. Please describe how to “sex” a board hamster in 11 words. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2004, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/277 "2004-01-16T19:15:06Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > …Please describe how to “sex” a board hamster in 11 words. Carefully grasp middle of abdomen. Flip on back. Examine naughty bits. Describe the Democratic primaries in 65 words. You may not mention any of the candidates names. But you must mention Bill O’Reilly, Al Franken, and Mother Theresa at least once each. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2004, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/278 "2004-01-17T06:39:17Z")
Various candidates will vie for votes in different states, with the New Hampshire contest traditionally viewed as the “kickoff” primary. Bill O’Reilly will attack most of the competitors for being too liberal, while Al Franken will mock the same individuals for pandering to conservatives. Mother Theresa will not run. Not only is she dead, she was born in Europe, and would thus be ineligible anyway. Do you care who gets to, and ultimately wins, the upcoming Super Bowl? Explain why in XXXVIII words. ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2004, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/279 "2004-01-17T07:10:48Z")
What is Super Bowl? :dubious: Personally, I could really care less about what team actually gets to and ultimately wins the dang thing! I have better things to waste my precious time with and I think football sucks anyway! Explain how one can seduce an attractive woman while unknowingly showing booger in 25 words. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2004, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189/280 "2004-01-18T06:17:10Z")
You arrive at her door with flowers in hand, kiss her tenderly, and whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Did I mention she was blindfolded? Explain the concept of “jumping the shark” in 26 words, two of which are the first and last names of an actor or character. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-describe-y-in-x-number-of-words-challenge/182189.md?page=15)