# The Detroit Lions' spirit of giving **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 25, 2000, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174 "2000-12-25T15:41:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2000, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/1 "2000-12-25T15:41:17Z")
I am not here to particularly excoriate the Lions for their monumental choke Sunday against the hapless Bears. How was this not to be expected? If I’d have been in Vegas this week, I’d have bet my house and the neighbor’s house on the Bears getting **10 points**. Whoever came up with _that_ betting line doesn’t know much about Lions history. The Pontiac Pussies collectively wet themselves and whimper for their mommies any time anything has ever been truly expected of them. Such as beating a 4-11 team at home to make the playoffs. I think I speak for all true Lions fans who have been driven to near homicidal insanity by this team when I say, “Good. I’m glad they didn’t make it.” Did any true football fan want this team clogging up the playoffs like a post-holiday turd overflowing a toilet? Did anyone want the Lions keeping the _Rams_ out of the playoffs? At least there’s an offense to see there. The Lions played great defense the second half of the year – until it counted in the last game. Then they let a running back named James Allen (who?) do his Jim Brown impression. All of a sudden Cade McNown, the player who many Bears players said they would quit if he started this week, he’s that shitty, looks like Johnny Unitas. The Lions offense can’t do **one thing** right with regularity. Not ONE. In the mid-90s, the Lions had the number one offense in the NFL. And they went nowhere because their coach and defense sucked. Then they got a coach, and they went nowhere because both their offensive and defensive personnel had key weaknesses. Now they have a defense, and they go nowhere because their offense sucks. How fucked up is that? They always find a way. This franchise has won **one playoff game since 1957.** So when you Bengals fans (who have been to two Super Bowls) and fans of other sad-sack organizations start your crying, don’t expect any sympathy from moi. Detroit Free Press sports columnist [Mitch Albom](http://www.freep.com/sports/albom/mitch25_20001225.htm) sums it up nicely in his column today: > [@](#): > > As collapses go, Sunday’s was magnificent. You have to step back and _admire_ this baby. When all you have to do to make the playoffs is beat a terrible team at home, and even with that, you still have to throw an interception for a touchdown, you have to fumble, you have to draw an illegal motion penalty on fourth down, you have to fail to reach the end zone from the 10, you have to give up a 54-yard field goal – and you have to do all that in the _final seven minutes of the game_ – well, let’s face it, folks, not _every_ franchise in the NFL can pull that off. What more need be said? Any Cubs fans wanna go get drunk? ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2000, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/2 "2000-12-25T16:53:03Z")
:::snicker::: Merry Christmas, Milo! ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2000, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/3 "2000-12-25T19:06:05Z")
Hey Milo! Where’s that sig! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Road\_Rash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a8b319/32.png) [@Road\_Rash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Road_Rash)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2000, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/4 "2000-12-25T21:01:11Z")
You are getting way too worked up over a insignificant football game. How does it affect your life? Football is good entertainment, fun for hanging out and drinking beers with friends, but it shouldn’t be life. Now Mick Foley getting fired as the commissioner of the WWF, that’s some shit. ---
**Author:** ![edwino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@edwino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/edwino)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/5 "2000-12-26T01:00:24Z")
And now I have to watch my Saints lose to the Rams, at home, in the first round of the playoffs. Bringing their all-time playoff record to 0-6. I’m there with you, Milo. ---
**Author:** ![Xploder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a183cd/32.png) [@Xploder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xploder)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/6 "2000-12-26T04:08:35Z")
I gotta admit…my wife LOVES the Lions for some unknown reason…I quit caring LONG ago since I believe that old people that can barely stand by themselves would probably STILL beat the shit out of them… On the other hand, I got my son the NFL Blitz 2001 Playstation game and have been able to consistently kick his ass every game even with the shitty Lions which is amazing since I’ve never played a sport video game in my life before today… ---
**Author:** ![Oblong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/c0e974/32.png) [@Oblong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oblong)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/7 "2000-12-26T04:50:49Z")
Milo… I’m with you. The suffering has gone on long enough. Ford should move the team to another city and let us start over. This isn’t a curse. A curse involves flukes. ONE PLAYOFF GAME in my lifetime is all the Lions have won. But, really, Milo… what can we expect? What did we expect? It starts at the top and until that changes we are doomed. ---
**Author:** ![Fugazi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f08c70/32.png) [@Fugazi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fugazi)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/8 "2000-12-26T11:25:21Z")
Thanks Milo, Didn’t think anything could make me feel better about the Brown’s season, but you just did. ---
**Author:** ![rushtopher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e47774/32.png) [@rushtopher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rushtopher)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2000, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-detroit-lions-spirit-of-giving/47174/9 "2000-12-26T16:21:13Z")
You could be a fan of that horrid Bears team. But to be honest, I was pretty sure that the Lions would find a way to lose that game. They do have a gift. As I Cub fan I will gladly go drink with you.