# The Devil Asks: What do you wish for? **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [January 20, 2021, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024 "2021-01-20T22:07:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/41 "2021-01-22T18:57:55Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > I wish for another five seasons of Supernatural. OANN picks up the option on Supernatural; changes the plotline to mirror “Touched By An Angel”; the cast all quits, to be replaced by various Osmonds. I wish to have the perfect roast beef sandwich. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/42 "2021-01-22T19:22:20Z")
You get the perfect roast beef sandwich, which tastes so heavenly divine, all other food is ruined for you and tastes like rotten garbage in comparison. I wish Sam and Dianne had gotten married on _Cheers_. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/43 "2021-01-22T19:46:05Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > I wish Sam and Dianne had gotten married on _Cheers_ In a plot twist critics decried as “even too bizarre for the cocaine-addled 80s,” Sam Malone marries then-San Francisco mayor Dianne Feinstein playing herself in a cameo appearance. Ratings tank and the series is soon canceled. Let’s do an obvious one: I wish for world peace. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.winston_oboogie/32/2945_2.png) [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Winston_OBoogie)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/44 "2021-01-22T20:08:16Z")
[Former NBA player World B. Free](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_B._Free) changes his name to World Peace. I wish for the ability to control all probability. (I asked my 21-year-old son for a wish) ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/45 "2021-01-22T20:19:01Z")
> [@Dr.Winston\_OBoogie](#): > > [Former NBA player World B. Free](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_B._Free) changes his name to World Peace. _Not playing game_ There was already an NBA player named Metta World Peace (née Ron Artest) and, in a bit of irony, perhaps best known for the “Malice in the Palace” debacle. _/not playing game_ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/46 "2021-01-22T20:58:55Z")
Congrats! You have the ability to control all probability. With that, free, comes the power to see all possibilities. This stuns your brain into permanent aboulia, rendering youeffectively unable to select any choice at all. I wish for Spam. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/47 "2021-01-22T22:56:51Z")
All your filters are removed and ads retroactively flood your UI from the past 20 years. You can no longer use any computer or mobile platform to surf the web because of the massive overload of your bandwidth. I wish for my virginity back. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/48 "2021-01-22T23:27:21Z")
You, and ever other person, have your sex history retroactively canceled, effectively eliminating the human race. I wish for more wishes. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2021, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/49 "2021-01-22T23:30:17Z")
Here you go: all the wishes you want. But, one thing, every time you make a wish, I get a wish, and mine goes first. Mwaa. Ha. Ha. I can haz cheezburger? ---
**Author:** ![Enjoy\_Slurm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enjoy_slurm/32/3937_2.png) [@Enjoy\_Slurm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enjoy_Slurm)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 9:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/50 "2021-01-23T09:20:57Z")
You get cheezburger. And since “cheez” is the slang term for albatross herpes you now also have albatross herpes. I wish to live in the sun. ---
**Author:** ![DemonTree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demontree/32/8646_2.png) [@DemonTree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonTree)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/51 "2021-01-23T10:10:14Z")
You are transformed into the picture on page 3 of _The Sun_, seen but unable to move or speak. I wish to have a long, healthy, and happy life. ---
**Author:** ![Fiendish\_Astronaut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiendish_astronaut/32/3295_2.png) [@Fiendish\_Astronaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiendish_Astronaut)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/52 "2021-01-23T11:03:10Z")
You cannot stop grinning. 24 hours of every day your muscles are locked into a grin and you can never ever stop. I wish to to be the most talented soccer player that ever lived. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/53 "2021-01-23T11:54:46Z")
Your soccer team wins every game you start in. You made the heads of David Beckham, Pele and Christiano Ronaldo spin with your agility and speed. Then you develop incurable toe fungus, arthritic knees, and a deadly allergy to rubber and your career crashes and burns. I wish for a pink ping pong ball. ---
**Author:** ![DemonTree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demontree/32/8646_2.png) [@DemonTree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonTree)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/54 "2021-01-23T13:05:40Z")
Done. You’d better head to the hospital to have it extracted… I wish for better social skills. ---
**Author:** ![Enjoy\_Slurm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enjoy_slurm/32/3937_2.png) [@Enjoy\_Slurm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enjoy_Slurm)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/55 "2021-01-23T17:18:32Z")
You are the Belle of The Ball. Everyone loves talking to you. People just can’t get enough of your witticism charm and humor. So much so that people stalk you everywhere and break into your house constantly. It’s like everyone has a fever and the only prescription is you. You are “more cowbell.” To get away from this zombie horde you move to Antartica to live with the penguins. I wish I had new socks. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/56 "2021-01-23T17:27:24Z")
You get new Socks the Cat. Dozens of them. Hundreds of them. And they keep reproducing faster than you can get them fixed. [![](https://mondrian.mashable.com/uploads%252Fcard%252Fimage%252F485627%252Fae271f7c-a125-4f1b-bf98-ebd042ad2c07.jpg%252F950x534__filters%253Aquality%252880%2529.jpg?signature=mi84NIiEhlP0HI9K6NR2u2gy8Us=&source=https%3A%2F%2Fblueprint-api-production.s3.amazonaws.com) ](https://mondrian.mashable.com/uploads%252Fcard%252Fimage%252F485627%252Fae271f7c-a125-4f1b-bf98-ebd042ad2c07.jpg%252F950x534__filters%253Aquality%252880%2529.jpg?signature=mi84NIiEhlP0HI9K6NR2u2gy8Us=&source=https%3A%2F%2Fblueprint-api-production.s3.amazonaws.com) I wish I had a great singing voice. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/57 "2021-01-23T17:41:33Z")
You have a great singing voice on Earth. But you are transported to the planet Pookry with has an atmosphere made up of mostly helium. I wish I had great woodworking skills. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/58 "2021-01-23T19:16:25Z")
> [@racer72](#): > > I wish I had great woodworking skills. Just like that other Carpenter I ran into, you can make anything outa wood, but sooner or later you’re gonna end up making your own cross. I wish everyone had their own personal pelican. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2021, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/59 "2021-01-23T21:20:52Z")
Everybody has their own personal pelican. And they reproduce. Billions and billions of them. The entire planet is knee-deep in pelican shit. I wish I could fit into my old size 32 jeans. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2021, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024/60 "2021-01-24T00:54:06Z")
You are now 2.5 feet tall. You can fit _entirely_ into your old size 32 jeans! I wish for the heat death of the universe to occur right now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-devil-asks-what-do-you-wish-for/931024.md?page=4)