# The Doorman cometh **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 23, 2026, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911 "2026-02-23T18:44:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/1 "2026-02-23T18:44:34Z")
I’m not sure. It may just be my addled brain… A guy was holding the door into the pharmacy. 4 or 5 people walked in as he held the door. Me and Ivy were nearing the entrance, I see his other hand doing a weird come-on through motion. I spun around and went right back to the car. Ivy scrambled to catch me up. Asking what the heck was my problem. I side-eye and see the guy still standing there with the door in his hand. Looking after us like we were nuts(well, I kinda am, but still) First off, I’m thinking every one inside wishes he would move on and shut that pneumonia hole. It had to have let much cold air inside. Second, I don’t trust people who do these things. I’m not sure why I don’t trust a creepy looking guy holding the door and many people pass and then he follows behind. Just why? Now if you see someone struggling on a crutch or walker, yes sure. Help. But just a average looking shoppers? Something ain’t adding up. I just know I’m not passing through a door, after a crowd and be the last in line. Not happening. Is it just me? I am normally a trusting person, some things just make hairs on my neck to stand up. This is one. (ETA, This is not a store employee) ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/2 "2026-02-23T19:04:21Z")
I think it’s just you. I’ve often seen someone hold a door when a group of people, not necessarily all together, were approaching, and continue to hold it until everybody was through. I never thought anything of it. What did you think he was going to do? Did you have your wallet sticking out of your back pocket and thought he was going to grab it? ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/3 "2026-02-23T19:06:05Z")
I would consider it gentlemanly. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/4 "2026-02-23T19:11:57Z")
I think it’s you. Where I’m from it’s considered a courteous thing to do. I still do it frequently and most say thank you and seem genuinely appreciative. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/5 "2026-02-23T19:25:46Z")
Another vote for “it’s just you”. It’s called courtesy. Although I do wonder about people who think they need to hold the door open for people who are still halfway across the parking lot. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/6 "2026-02-23T19:40:10Z")
Ok. I’m gonna mark it up to my general anxiety about most everything. The thing is we were a good bit away from the door and him waving was just creepy. And yes, stuff in the back pocket is an issue. My daughter’s phone was slipped outta her back pocket in a Walmart at Christmas. She was able to find it at someone’s house but there’s no recourse. The police ain’t gonna recover it. Big mess to get all her stuff and passwords redone. Get a new phone. Don’t wag your phone on your butt where the world can see it. Too many thieves roaming around. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/7 "2026-02-23T19:46:00Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Is it just me? I don’t know if it’s just you, but I do know that it ain’t me. mmm ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/8 "2026-02-23T19:48:59Z")
Are you the door holder type?😀 I would trust you. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/9 "2026-02-23T19:52:42Z")
I am. But I am also aware when _not_ to hold the door open, when doing so would place pressure on the incoming pedestrian to unnecessarily pick up the pace to not further inconvenience the door-holder. It is a fine line. mmm ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/10 "2026-02-23T19:59:07Z")
Thank you. See a smart person knows this. My encounter today was not _this_ type at all. Sorry. But yes, I judged him. In my tiny lizard brain my spidey senses perked up. I’m in a real anxious mood today. Another day I might feel less bothered. In the end we were able to go thru the drive thru to get my drugs I need before I go to the hospital in the morning. ---
**Author:** ![Eric1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3bc359/32.png) [@Eric1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eric1)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/11 "2026-02-23T20:58:04Z")
It’s the new anticipation right before a surgery that gets to me. My nervousness and others as well - that’s a doozy all right. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/12 "2026-02-23T22:42:20Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Thank you. See a smart person knows this. > > My encounter today was not _this_ type at all. I also know when it’s the right time or not. You should have just stood there and said, “no, after you!” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2026, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/13 "2026-02-23T22:45:42Z")
Would, that I could. I’m a runner. If it bugs me I’m outta there. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/14 "2026-02-24T00:45:45Z")
Beck, this is the most UnSouthern thing I have heard from you. Our beloved Mothers raised us to hold the door open for women and girls. Were I to fail in that, Mama Plant, G-d rest her soul, would come back from the grave and slap me. Granted, in New Hampshire, I stepped back for two ladies (and I use the term loosely) to enter a super market automatic door before me, and they ran away in panic. We ain’t Yankees! Calm yourself. Eat some pecan (PUH KAHN, dammit) pie and grits. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/15 "2026-02-24T02:24:42Z")
I believe it’s a personal failing. On my part. I’m working on it ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/16 "2026-02-24T04:10:52Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Sorry. But yes, I judged him. In my tiny lizard brain my spidey senses perked up. > > I’m in a real anxious mood today. Another day I might feel less bothered. I think that’s OK. Something in a more primitive part of your brain was alarmed (even if you couldn’t say why exactly) and it set off your defense mechanisms. I don’t think it was “judgement” so much as an instinctive reaction to perceived danger. Those senses can keep you alive. They can also leave you feeling silly. Note: This post comes only about an hour after I semi-chastised Beck for “judging” all delivery people based on YouTubes of some fetchboyz\* being assholes. She wasn’t really being _that_ judgmental in [that thread](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-likely-is-uber-to-ban-me-if-i-do-a-credit-card-charge-back-for-food-that-was-never-delivered/1027885), but I push back against some generalizations when I come across them. “Beck, you judged.” “Beck you didn’t judge.” Rather inconsistant! \*Band name? Maybe. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/17 "2026-02-24T05:17:34Z")
Maybe a nice little ditty. 😀 The “fetchboyz” are not exactly a consistent bunch. There’s good and there’s bad. Like I said I’ve never used a food delivery service. I have gotten loads of deliveries. Being nice is nice and all, but they want tips. Just like my hairdresser, and many service persons. I judge the waitress at the restaurant otherwise I wouldn’t know how to tip. I judge how my hairdresser does my hair. I have too, I spent many years finding the good ones. Yes I tip well. I assume I’ve made many of her credit card payments. Some judging is important to decision making. Else we just accept things and just kick the wall. I’m sorry, if you say you never judge you must be a saint. Good or bad, we all do it. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/18 "2026-02-24T08:20:10Z")
I didn’t mean to start something with you, Beck! I’m sure I’m as judgmental, or more so, than the average joe and I’m certainly no saint. I was never trying to claim that I was any great shakes. And I do agree with you that tipping matters to fetchboyz. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/19 "2026-02-24T15:11:11Z")
Beck, what does it mean, “fetchboyz”? ---
**Author:** ![minor7flat5](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minor7flat5/32/258_2.png) [@minor7flat5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minor7flat5)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2026, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911/20 "2026-02-24T16:40:13Z")
A few years ago I broke my shoulder, and I was shocked at the number of people who would simply blow past me and go into a place of business, letting the door close behind them, not caring that they shut the door on a one-armed man. And it’s pretty obvious if you are walking with your arm in a sling. The funny thing is, the prime offenders were women. Guys held the door open for me–possibly from a finer tuned sense of “see if someone is coming behind and hold the door” So if you see someone in a sling, hold the door open for them. Don’t get me started on those clueless passengers when I had to fly with a broken shoulder (family emergency). [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-doorman-cometh/1027911.md?page=2)