# The dumbest 8 seconds in sports. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 7, 2006, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816 "2006-05-07T23:03:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/1 "2006-05-07T23:03:18Z")
Bull riding. Is there anything more retarded? It’s not a sport. It’s an insult to atheletes everywhere. What are the skills required? - low IQ - lack of self preservation insticts - delight in pissing off a 1,500lb mass of muscle, hooves and horns The only thing marginally more stupid would be waking a sleeping bear by slapping it on the snout and standing there for eight seconds before trying to run. Fucking rednecks. Is there anything they won’t do after a few beers and a dare by their buddies? ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/2 "2006-05-07T23:18:43Z")
This is going to go well. ::Rolleyes:: ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/3 "2006-05-07T23:18:53Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Bull riding. > > Is there anything more retarded? > > It’s not a sport. It’s an insult to atheletes everywhere. > > What are the skills required? > > - low IQ > - lack of self preservation insticts > - delight in pissing off a 1,500lb mass of muscle, hooves and horns > > The only thing marginally more stupid would be waking a sleeping bear by slapping it on the snout and standing there for eight seconds before trying to run. > Fucking rednecks. Is there anything they won’t do after a few beers and a dare by their buddies? On the other hand, there’s a thread right above this one in which many, many people are riding one single silly ass cow–and it may not be a sport, but it sure is fun! As for bull riding, I kinda like it just because it does weed out the stupid, and given the nature of the activity itself I’d say that even before death ensues a reduction of fertility is likely, so this is a win/win no matter how you look at it. Also, I dig any instance when the animals get a free shot and don’t have to pay for it. When some dumbass cowboy dies under the hooves of a one ton Longhorn they don’t kill the bull–they just change its name to something scarier… Again, win/win. And no, for the record, there really isn’t anything a stupid redneck won’t do after enough beer. A good thing, too, or YouTube would fall apart, which would be a tragedy. A lose/lose, if you will. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/4 "2006-05-07T23:48:42Z")
As opposed to bull fighting- which has been around just about forever. You know, where they stab the animal partially to death ahead of time, then a big strong man comes and kills it. Makes way more sense. Stupid we-- oh wait, the only racial epitaph we are allowed to say here is redneck, I forgot. :rolleyes: They are much stupider, much less athletic “sports” out there to pit. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/5 "2006-05-07T23:54:46Z")
My best friend growing up was a bullrider (partially crippled in an accident at 18 too). I have been on mechanical bulls a few times. It certainly takes strength and technique. That makes it a sport in my mind. I was so sore after riding mechanical bulls the next day that I could hardly walk. It may only seem like 8 seconds but the time probably goes by faster for marathon runners. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/6 "2006-05-08T00:00:08Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > Stupid we-- oh wait, the only racial epitaph we are allowed to say here is redneck, I forgot. :rolleyes: I’m pretty sure you didn’t mean “epitaph”. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/7 "2006-05-08T00:00:22Z")
I don’t believe a Longhorn, one ton or not, has ever been used in a professional bull riding contest. I also believe it is a mistake to call a bull rider a “redneck.” Bull riders belong in a class all their own. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/8 "2006-05-08T00:06:03Z")
> [@Priceguy](#): > > I’m pretty sure you didn’t mean “epitaph”. Wait wait! So you’re telling me that’s NOT what we’re putting on tombstones now? Well, sonofabitch. :smack: Stupid spell check, always misleading me. Of course I meant, “epithet.” ---
**Author:** ![Cowgirl\_Jules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@Cowgirl\_Jules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cowgirl_Jules)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/9 "2006-05-08T00:23:36Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Fucking rednecks. Is there anything they won’t do after a few beers and a dare by their buddies? Um, no. I was all set to defend bull riding, but honestly, that’s where the dimmer bulbs in rodeo gravitate. And after a few years of it, those that weren’t a little off mentally catch up to the rest. It does take a lot of skill and a huge amount of strength. I’ll give 'em that. But I date ropers. They’re smarter and less damaged. Who needs all ten fingers anyway? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/10 "2006-05-08T00:54:04Z")
People do dumber things every day in the name of sport. Bull riding is enough of a tradition so I don’t fault it on that end. Now the whole testicle-squeezing rig to make the bull buck? That I’m kind of squeamish about, in the moral sense. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/11 "2006-05-08T01:19:58Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > I don’t believe a Longhorn, one ton or not, has ever been used in a professional bull riding contest. I also believe it is a mistake to call a bull rider a “redneck.” Bull riders belong in a class all their own. Saw one my ownself–actually a Longhorn-Brahma cross with a big old hump on his neck and a pretty impressive set of horns. After he tossed the rider on his ass he trotted calmly down the chute, then took a nearly standing leap over a six foot fence and didn’t even knock a hoof on the top bar. :eek: I’ve had a ton of respect for them stupidy lookin’ cows ever since. I wouldn’t mess with one on a bet nor a dare! ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/12 "2006-05-08T01:31:19Z")
Bull riders may not be the sharpest pencils on the desk, but the stock contractors who provide the bulls for bucking are no fools. [In fact a number of them breed for topflight athletes:](http://teampbr.pbrnow.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=bull.faqs) > [@](#): > > Q: CAN ANY BULL COMPETE IN A PBR EVENT? > A: Definitely not. Saying that any bull is suitable for PBR competition is like saying that any human athlete is fit to compete in the Olympic Games. PBR bulls are the highest caliber bucking bulls in the business. Many are products of elite breeding programs that for years have been fine-tuning the important role genetics play in producing great bucking bulls. A majority of PBR bulls are bred and born to compete in the PBR arena. The best bulls are worth serious money: > [@](#): > > Q: WHAT IS THE AVERAGE PBR BULL WORTH? > A: The monetary value of a bucking bull depends greatly upon his proven performance in the arena, however most PBR bulls are worth $10,000 or more. As a PBR bull develops a proven record in the arena, his value increases. Chad Herrington, the 2000 PBR Stock Contractor of the Year, purchased two proven PBR bucking bulls - Blueberry Wine and Red Wolf - for $50,000 each. Berger Bucking Bulls, which owns Little Yellow Jacket, voted best bull of the 2001 Built Ford Tough Series World Championships, turned down a $100,000 offer for the second-generation bucking bull. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/13 "2006-05-08T01:36:49Z")
Sure is fun to watch! So hey, OP, what got under your skin so much about it that you felt the need to Pit it? Did someone say you looked like a bull rider or something? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/14 "2006-05-08T01:41:38Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > Sure is fun to watch! > > So hey, OP, what got under your skin so much about it that you felt the need to Pit it? Did someone say you looked like a bull rider or something? 😛 You don’t understand–a bull rider… KILT HIS DADDY!!! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Cowgirl\_Jules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@Cowgirl\_Jules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cowgirl_Jules)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/15 "2006-05-08T01:46:35Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > Now the whole testicle-squeezing rig to make the bull buck? That I’m kind of squeamish about, in the moral sense. That’s a flank cinch, and is nowhere near their testicles. It pisses them off, but doesn’t hurt them. Try sliding your rear cinch back too far on your saddle horse by mistake someday - it’ll buck too, most likely. ---
**Author:** ![Cheez\_Whia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d26b3c/32.png) [@Cheez\_Whia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheez_Whia)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/16 "2006-05-08T01:51:50Z")
I have only seen bull riding once, in person. It was enough for me. I wasn’t wondering about the contestants IQ, I was wondering about their _sanity_. Anyone who gets on the back of one of those things is batshit crazy! ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/17 "2006-05-08T01:52:28Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > You don’t understand–a bull rider… KILT HIS DADDY!!! 😛 Smart Aleck! Wait … I don’t think they’re dumb, per se. But the ones I’ve met in my lifetime do seem to have a rather aggressive streak to them. Bulls AND riders! I was working with a restaurant remodel crew that was mostly small town firemen with a second career. And two of them were bull riders. They weren’t stupid. They ran their subcontracting businesses quite well, could work off of blueprints just fine, and were fairly successful financially. Their problem? They were adreneline junkies. And ultra conceited ass holes to boot. Now, I won’t let them paint a whole group of people for me as ass wipes or anything, but I just have to wonder. Ever go to a prison rodeo? Listen to the taunting and bragging going on all around the bull riding events. It’s … interesting. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/18 "2006-05-08T02:43:45Z")
The really gutsy guys in bull riding, IMO, are the [rodeo clowns.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rodeo_clown) > [@](#): > > [Rodeo bulls, not known for their gentle nature in the arena, know that the sooner or later what’s behind their hump will be on the ground and many will instantly turn on a fallen rider. The one factor that keeps bull riding, the most dangerous event in rodeo, from being the least popular with contestants is the rodeo clown and bullfighter. > > Unlike his Latin counterpart who slays each bull that he sees in the arena, the rodeo clown fights bulls that have been there many times — they are arena-wise and know every trick in the book. Not only must the clown be a well-coordinated athlete in superb physical condition; he must be an expert on bovine psychology. Top rodeo clowns and bullfighters must also display a sixth sense that gives them the uncanny ability to be in exactly the right place at the right time. While the matador is concerned only with self-preservation, the rodeo clown operates with callous disregard for the commodity; his one objective is to save the cowboy.]([http://www.stuorg.iastate.edu/rodeo/rodeo/rodeo.html](http://www.stuorg.iastate.edu/rodeo/rodeo/rodeo.html)) ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/19 "2006-05-08T02:52:20Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > So hey, OP, what got under your skin so much about it that you felt the need to Pit it? Did someone say you looked like a bull rider or something? 😛 I’m watching Giro d’Italia and every other commercial on OLN is this stupid bull riding crap. Every time I see it I find myself rooting for the bull. Cycling is a sport with over a hundred years of history, skill, endurance and nigh superhuman performance. Bull riding is what Bubba, Cleetus and Billy Bob do on a slow weeknight with too much beer in their gut and not enough brains in their head. As for skill… meh… if I was sitting on the back of a monster like that, I’d be hanging on for dear life as well. If there is skill involved, it evades me. It looks like survive as survive can. Fun? It looks like something that takes place immediately after the phrase, “Hey guys! Watch this!!!” Yeah… I’m a bit of an elitist snob. What are you gonna do about it?! ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816/20 "2006-05-08T03:10:59Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > I’m watching Giro d’Italia and every other commercial on OLN is this stupid bull riding crap. Every time I see it I find myself rooting for the bull. Cycling is a sport with over a hundred years of history, skill, endurance and nigh superhuman performance. Bull riding is what Bubba, Cleetus and Billy Bob do on a slow weeknight with too much beer in their gut and not enough brains in their head. > > As for skill… meh… if I was sitting on the back of a monster like that, I’d be hanging on for dear life as well. If there is skill involved, it evades me. It looks like survive as survive can. > > Fun? It looks like something that takes place immediately after the phrase, “Hey guys! Watch this!!!” > > Yeah… I’m a bit of an elitist snob. What are you gonna do about it?! ~sigh~ Yeah, I managed to stay out of this the first time it topped the page but I cannot let it go. **EddyTeddyFreddy** is right, rodeo clowns are the gutsiest (is that a word??) and PBR bulls are some fantastically expensive creatures. Does being an elitist snob really mean that you get to slam something you obviously know _nothing_ about? What happened to fighting ignorance? Yes, bull riding does take skill and it takes a lot of nerve. And yes, it’s a valid sport, moreso than bowling. However, not many bull riders self-identify as athletes, so that’s not really a big deal. Bull riders do not ride bulls drunk. That is the height of stupidity. When riding a bull, one has to be extremely alert and ready to move when he or she is thrown. There are points awarded in bull riding - 50 to the rider and 50 to the bull. The combined score is their total and the closest to 100 is, of course, the winner. Points are awarded based on the way that someone rides - where their hands are positioned, how they move while the bull is bucking and how well they spur. The bull is rated basically on how well he does his job. Does he spin? Does he stay lively through the entire 8 seconds? And **Cowgirl Jules** is right, too. They don’t actually tie anything to the bull’s testicles. The flank is just lowered into the chute and tied around the back…close to the end of the stomach of the bull, and then the cowboy’s rope goes around the bull’s chest. Sometimes they tie the tail up in the back flank so it doesn’t get in the way. I guess that the history of bull-riding eludes you as well? It may not be as refined as cycling but all the elements of cycling that you mention are present in rodeo (and bull-riding) as well - history, endurance, skill and “nigh superhuman performance”. Bull-riding may seem to be a dangerous, dumb thing to do in your opinion, but since you don’t get to decide what we all do for fun, watch your boring cycling event and just ignore the damn commercials. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-8-seconds-in-sports/355816.md?page=2)